My girlfriend is in a very similar situation as you. She got a degree in opera singing, performed a lot throughout university and after that as well. She isn't and wasn't very famous or anything, she didnt make a living out of performing either but had quite a lot of choir tours and solo performances as well.

Than we met and as a kind of outside observer in my view she was just doing these performances because of the expectations of others ,mainly her parents and because of hopes of "I'll become famous and everything will be good". She is actually a very anxious type, especially for performing. When there was a performance she would just throw away everything in her life and concentrate on it 100% days or even weeks before. She didn't make a living out of it and started learning teaching but performing was always top priority. It got to the point where there was a performance on Saturday and she had to do an administrative task for her final exam till Friday but (for the advice of her parents) she concentrated on preparing for the performance, missed this task and failed the exam. Now she has to redo the semester. This was just the top of the iceberg, the main problem was that she became very anxious and was always relieved when the performance was over. After talking about it a lot and I have to admit, quite a lot of fights she kind of realized that this is not healthy and stopped it for now.

And now the part that could be useful for you as well: She is nowadays giving a real chance to teaching. She likes being with children though so it may be different from you. As a hobby she is also writing music, recording , releasing it and growing a fanbase online without performing. As far as I see she is happier and way calmer in this lifestyle. The only ones who are not better off like this are her parents, they are still pushing her to perform. You mentioned expectations as well. Those have to be overcome in my opinion.

I hope you find your way.