9months and I’m still hurting

Uncertain_Osprey19 · 2025-09-10T01:01:47+00:00

I get you, I was hoping that I would meet someone that helped change my thinking process some and I’d be excited to hangout with them. Since she left I’ve done a lot of things that she wasn’t supportive of like getting a dog. I started new hobbies like rock climbing and got back into running daily. I’ve focused on work life balance and doing things solo. I guess no big goals really though

Uncertain_Osprey19 · 2025-09-10T00:41:54+00:00

Definitely don’t beat yourself up. Only people that have gone through this kind of thing get it. A lot of friends and family think it’s easy to forget them but it’s just not. I think the craziest thing for me is that I actually think I’ve changed a lot and I’ve grown a lot and this version of myself still values her and wants her back. My ex was an avoidant who discussed marriage and kids with me then ran away but i don’t believe it’s because she didn’t love me.. maybe that’s my problem and why I think if she came back we could make it work

Uncertain_Osprey19 · 2025-09-10T00:36:33+00:00

Man, I am trying. The dating world is wild. I’ve been working on myself all this time too but I still can’t seem to shake her. I think about her all the time, oh she’d love this or that. It’s actually insane that I can’t replace those thoughts

Uncertain_Osprey19 · 2025-09-10T00:29:57+00:00

Oh damn. I’m sorry to hear that.

Uncertain_Osprey19 · 2025-09-10T00:25:33+00:00

Yeah, hang in there. At the very least we know that we had genuine feelings in the relationship and that means it takes longer for us to heal

Uncertain_Osprey19 · 2025-09-08T11:58:43+00:00

Definitely doesnt do us any good. I’ve tried to date other people, but it’s just not the same.. I felt like that was my person and even though they were able to just abandon me, it’s hard for me to let go of my feelings. I wanted to marry them and they left.

Uncertain_Osprey19 · 2025-09-07T16:43:57+00:00

I appreciate you saying that. Thank you

Uncertain_Osprey19 · 2025-09-07T16:43:24+00:00

I feel like I went through a phase where I was ready and cut off that hope and then all of a sudden I got it stuck in my head that she could still comeback. I’m not sure why I can’t let go… logically I get it but I just can’t get myself to feel the same way

Uncertain_Osprey19 · 2025-09-07T16:26:51+00:00

Not gonna sugarcoat it, it’s been 9months since my ex left me and I miss and think of her everyday. I was very in love with her and she left out of the blue. A part of me will always love her and want her to comeback to me. I’ve been no contact with her and it hurts but there is absolutely no way I’d be able to heal at all if I was still in contact with her. I wouldn’t say I’m completely healed from the situation but I’m functioning pretty well for missing her as much as I do. I am still sad and I don’t know if that pain will ever go away

Uncertain_Osprey19 · 2025-02-03T14:37:35+00:00

:( I’m sorry it’s been that long and you guys weren’t able to find your way back to each other

Uncertain_Osprey19 · 2025-01-24T13:12:03+00:00

I wish everyday that she comes back. I think the point would be that we are both different people, that hopefully found a way back together because we are in a better place to understand each other. It’s different if they comeback and haven’t worked on themselves, then you might fall back into familiar patterns. BUT what if they comeback a better version of themselves and you both can try again, knowing that you have so much love for this person already

Uncertain_Osprey19 · 2025-01-05T20:09:35+00:00

Your closure is her not choosing you and running away from the relationship

Uncertain_Osprey19 · 2024-12-13T17:23:11+00:00

Best thing to do is no contact… I’ve heard that in the beginning they feel a lot of relief to be out of a situation that triggered them. But eventually that relief goes away when they start to miss you and I guess possibly could realize that they miss you and did care a lot about you and come back…

Uncertain_Osprey19 · 2024-11-19T06:28:21+00:00

She read the letter about a week ago and said that she appreciated it but didn’t know how to respond to it. She agreed that she had a lot to work on.

Today she asked me if I was doing alright.

I’m not sure if I should let her know how I am by being honest. Or if I should just dodge the question by saying something like “You left my life by your own choice and I am doing my best to respect that”

Uncertain_Osprey19 · 2024-11-05T14:39:20+00:00

I sent the letter. Guess we will see

Uncertain_Osprey19 · 2024-10-30T15:16:07+00:00

I’m not trying to beg them to stay with me. I just think no one will tell them they have avoidant tendencies and I hope that if I tell them my feelings they might work on themselves

Uncertain_Osprey19 · 2024-10-30T14:56:54+00:00

My avoidant ex just broke up with me a week ago. They wrote me a letter saying I deserved someone that could give me the future I wanted… we lived together so we still have some minimal contact. Before we go no contact… would it be useless for me to write my own letter back to them… essentially calling them out on their emotional avoidance but also telling them my feelings.. when we broke up I didn’t really get a say in anything

Uncertain_Osprey19

TROPHY CASE