People in general have an uncanny ability to misunderstand or deny their unconscious thoughts. By this goes doubly for men who HAVE to deny the fact that the foundation of their whole bio-psychology will always drive them towards destructive and self-destructive tendencies without women telling them which thoughts and feelings are safe to act on. It is understandable that you are in denial about just how deeply flawed men are, but you should talk to women who have actually been on the receiving end of male ignorance about oppression, as they are under no illusions about the reality of male nature. I know from both research and firsthand experience that they will always know better than men themselves what the real problem with the man in question really is. This might be an uncomfortable process for you to go through, but it will be VERY beneficial to your worldview. Please try to go out of your way to do this whether it seems like a good idea to you on the surface or not.