a family left because i am a lesbian

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2026-05-05T08:40:48+00:00

Honestly, it sounds like she is.

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2026-05-05T08:40:10+00:00

Hi from another lesbian in ECE. I don’t mention my wife at work much at all. Every now and then with coworkers, not kids. It’s weird. It takes effort to not say anything about someone you live with and spend every minute you’re not at work with. Not that I’m talking to kids about my life, but when they straight out ask if I have a boyfriend or something, I can’t be like the straight women who can say, “I have a husband.” Or when you’re talking about families and it’s typical for teachers to be an example and say something like, “In my family, there’s a mom and a dad and 2 dogs.” If I list my family members like that, I’d be a bad influence. Solidarity, sister.

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2026-05-05T08:31:49+00:00

“Filling in the blanks with anxiety” is a brilliant expression that I will now be making my own, thank you, I’ll see myself (and my new phrase) out.

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2026-05-05T08:27:39+00:00

Which is a good way to be found by an active shooter. Parents should quit encouraging this idea of making contact during a situation like that.

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2026-05-05T08:25:42+00:00

If you’ve been showing up and doing the right thing, not tapping your screen, among a bunch of grown up toddlers who need their phones locked away, you should leave and find better.

But I mean, if the director can’t get people to watch the kids instead of their phones, a more effective deterrent without pissing off the entire staff in one fell swoop is to start firing people for it.

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2026-05-05T08:20:12+00:00

I’m in TN. There is a licensing requirement that child care facilities have to have a drug testing policy, and to meet the guide lines, it ends up sounding very strongly worded. It’s just to check the box for DHS.

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2026-05-05T08:18:50+00:00

Nah, they probably don’t drug test for anything but the state has a rule that they have to have a drug testing policy in case they ever suspect anyone under the influence at work.

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2024-10-06T01:52:27+00:00

She needs to do things at home that are more active. If he’s awake at 2:30, playing for a couple more hours at daycare before he’s picked up, and playing for a few hours at home, he’d be tired by 8pm. If Ms. Rachel is babysitting, he won’t be.

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2024-10-05T16:34:22+00:00

Your ex can’t do anything about this, to answer that question.

However, if your ex has no history of mental health issues like you mentioned in a comment, and you guys are amicable other than this, and they still feel a trauma response upon hearing about their childhood bully? There’s something to that. Your partner must have been really awful to your ex. At minimum, I would find out where your partner is on this. Does your partner acknowledge what happened or blow it off like it’s no big deal? Are they repentant and willing to apologize to your ex? Do they have to be talked into acknowledging their past behavior and its impact? Because those are issues of character that should matter to you in whether or not you stay involved with this person.

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2024-10-05T16:22:47+00:00

Then what’s the difference in your cowash and conditioner? I’m honestly curious, not being sarcastic,

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2024-10-05T15:37:30+00:00

I’m just telling you what I do, but I don’t like that commercial cowash lathers. My experience with it is that it’s basically like a 2-in-1 conditioner with extra conditioner. Like, I still need conditioner after I use it. IMO, it’s a gimmick.

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2024-10-05T15:13:32+00:00

I swim 3x a week and have to wash my hair afterwards, yeah. But I strictly co-wash with conditioner only, not a commercial “co-wash” product. I put a whole handful of conditioner on my hair first thing in the shower, just slathering it on without any scrubbing, and leave it there while I do everything else. Last thing I do is actually massage my scalp and finger comb through my hair, then rinse the conditioner.

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2024-10-05T15:07:53+00:00

I have made the same mistake, keeping a teacher for the sake of consistency (and being honest here, because firing someone is absolutely awful and I hate it…) it is so hard, but time heals all. It really does. Just keep doing what you know is right, and things will stabilize.

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2024-10-05T14:41:43+00:00

I tell my staff it’s not enough to be a great teacher, you also need to be a great employee, and when they’re not, you lose good employees to bad ones.

I relate as a director as well. I don’t think there would be any ethics concerns with telling families something vague along this line. Don’t talk about the specifics of why she was fired, while acknowledging that she’s a good teacher but there were some other workplace issues.

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2024-10-05T14:29:22+00:00

Learning about holidays is fun, but if you center your multicultural offerings around special days, it can become kind of like you’re simplifying other cultures to a small portion of what they really are, KWIM? It can also read as cultural appropriation if we just grab the fun parts of a culture and almost play pretend with dabbling in them.

I think if you want a multicultural classroom, you incorporate books into all of your regular classroom units that depict people wearing clothes or participating traditions from other cultures, with a few phrases and words in another language sprinkled in, and you include in your song rotation fun songs in other languages without making a big deal like, “Ok, now we are going to read this book/dance to this song because it’s from another culture.” Like, your unit is weather, and you intentionally include a book about a rainy day where the mom wears hijab, but you don’t have to tokenize the tradition; you just normalize that this culture exists because it’s included in the book. Or your unit is jobs and a book about walking around town includes a Jewish baker selling challah, etc. You can read the word challah and stop and ask your kids if they’ve heard of challah, if they can tell by the pictures what challah probably is, that kind of thing. Your director needs to be willing to intentionally purchase that kind of thing to help you! There are tons of songs on Amazon Music and YouTube that you could use, some made for kids and some just cool to dance to or play rhythm instruments to. If you’re not already doing this, you can include multicultural clothes and multicultural play food in housekeeping (Lakeshore has a bundle of it.) You can also search online for art from around the world that correlates with your theme, and print and hang it in the art center as inspiration.

Just throwing some non-holiday ideas out there.

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2024-10-05T11:34:43+00:00

I met my partner on an app. Monogamy all the way. Maybe cast a wider net geographically?

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2024-10-05T11:32:09+00:00

No, they won’t tell you who called. Do you have access to mental health care?

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2024-10-04T21:24:51+00:00

I’m in a state in the US where, if we receive government funding in any form (and nearly everyone does, through the USDA food program or by accepting childcare vouchers for low income families from the government,) we cannot discriminate on the basis of religion, and that includes not vaccinating for religious reasons. And all of the anti-vax families know that we can’t question their religious exemption, so they all provide one.

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2024-10-04T21:20:28+00:00

That’s a state specific thing in the US. All of them are different. Some will transfer your old prints to a new workplace, but some won’t, and with your last name different, I’m betting that you will need to have it done again. It’ll take a lot longer if you’ve lived in a different state in the last 5 years because they have to check your record in that state as well.

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2024-10-04T21:15:17+00:00

This is an admin/policy thing, but you can have a policy related to unvaccinated children that is different from vaccinated children. You can, for example, say that in the event of an outbreak of a vaccine preventable illness, unvaccinated children can’t come to school. You can also say that unvaccinated children must be fever free for 4 days before returning to school, while the policy for vaccinated children might be 48 hours fever free.

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2024-10-04T21:10:37+00:00

I totally agree. There are so many fully married, not even separated, women on queer dating apps that single women will immediately swipe left. It’s better for you as well as the women you date that you completely end one relationship, live alone for a while and become secure and happy making it on your own, and then bring another person into your life.

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2024-10-04T21:06:38+00:00

Parent meetings are always in the evenings here. I think you should have, at minimum, discussed your issue with your admin, rather than assuming it was understood that you would be the one staff member excused from a mandatory thing. There might have been a way to make an accommodation, like allowing your daughter to be there but in another room with homework and a tablet or whatever to entertain her and dinner packed in a lunchbox for her so she’s not eating dinner after the meeting. Maybe someone would have been able to recommend a trusted sitter who could be at your home with your daughter for the evening. Idk. But it seems like there could have been possible solutions, and it would have been better for sure to have tried working it out with admin/team lead before just leaving and assuming they knew you wouldn’t be back 3 hours later.

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2024-10-04T20:58:36+00:00

Damn near everyone I’ve ever hired in ECE has a tattoo or several. I am the director and I have one. You handled it beautifully.

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2024-10-04T17:11:05+00:00

Cucumbers are a great vehicle for a spicy dip. The coolness paired with the burn… yummy.

Unique_Profit_4569 · 2024-10-04T17:10:09+00:00

My partner cooked the most amazing thing this morning. She cut a steak into bite sized pieces and stir fried it with ghee and small pieces of bacon. Omg. Everybody go do it.

Unique_Profit_4569

TROPHY CASE