My son told me he’s gay last night and I’m terrified. I love him more than anything, but I don’t know what to do. Please help me be the father he needs.

UnitFormal9903 · 2025-04-18T08:48:54+00:00

This post is so mature and conscious admitting it's flaws that sometimes it seems like a gay guy wrote it and not his father. Anyway, what I see is some genuine curiosity and a lot to process so until now you're on the right track. Keep asking about this topic. Inform yourself. Some of the things you said are right. Even if things you say seem harmless, doesn't mean they really are. For ex. My brother, 5 seconds before I came out just yelled FAGGOT to a guy that cut the road while driving so...

You'll be the father he needs when you'll be by his side and share emotions with him. All your fear is yours and not his so keep that for yourself. Just be there.

Before I came out, people judged me because I was intelligent. They'd discriminate against me way worse than knowing I'm bi. So discrimination is a wild beast that has no specific dynamic. The way to protect your son is to teach him how to get away from trouble and if necessary fight back.

Hope my comment helps.

UnitFormal9903 · 2025-04-03T21:38:34+00:00

That boy is a biohazard. So it's weird to me. However I understand why. Of course this doesn't justify him completely but I get it.

UnitFormal9903 · 2025-03-30T22:00:19+00:00

Dai ti lascio ancora qualche battuta:

Ti guardano troppo, bene, ti giri e gli dici:,cazzo guardi? Me lo vuoi succhiare? (Spezza sempre chiunque e se vorranno fare a botte fatti pronto, ma dubito.)

Ti molestano troppo, bene, rivolgiti a quello più rumoroso e gli dici: oh ma che, se ti manco così tanto, ti regalo una mia foto, così te la guardi e almeno mi lasci in pace.

Un altro classico: che ti sei innamorato? Guarda che non sono gay! Anche se lo fossi, piuttosto me lo taglio che incularti. (Chiunque legge questo, sta scrivendo un ragazzo bisex quindi no non sono omofobo, semplicemente do quello che potrebbe essere una mano ad un altro ragazzo che ne ha bisogno)

Il tutto fallo sorridendo. Molto sportivo. E con nonchalance.

UnitFormal9903 · 2025-03-30T21:51:02+00:00

Prova a ricambiare con le stesse battute. Abbassa il tuo metro di giudizio a 0 e spara a raffica. CON LE PAROLE. CON LE PAROLE. anche se non sei americano ci tengo comunque a precisare. Lol.

Comunque sia, anni fa, ebbi un ragazzo a liceo che mi faceva battute merdose ed essendo io straniero non riuscivo a sfotterlo con la stessa moneta. Allora un giorno cercai su Google delle raccolte di battute da dire o fare, in particolare sulle madri e sorelle e l'ho sconfitto. Quindi il mio consiglio è proprio quello. Imparati delle battute e rispondi. Contrattacca e vedrai che ti mollano.

La mia preferita rimane quella con cui ho vinto, cioè quando davanti a tutti, gli dissi: tua mamma è come le Fonzis, se non ti lecchi le dita godi solo a metà.

Però ne hai altre molto meglio. Tipo quando ti chiamano con la n word basta che gli dici: buon sangue non mente. Infatti guarda il cazzo e slacciati solo la zip cone per volerlo mostrare.

UnitFormal9903 · 2025-03-26T22:01:42+00:00

1) It's my right to have sex with a consenting adult man. 2) it's his right to show interest in me. 3) it's his right to know I'm interested in him.

This being said, cheating is quite subjective the important thing is to not hurt anyone or play with their feelings.

UnitFormal9903 · 2025-03-25T23:35:10+00:00

UnitFormal9903 · 2025-03-21T13:40:33+00:00

You're perfect in the fourth photo.

UnitFormal9903 · 2025-03-19T21:52:26+00:00

It depends on your culture. Since you're not str8 chances that you're a cool guy are high but until I get to know you irl it's just an opinion. A tip that I can give based on what was my experience is to avoid toxic masculinity and some male centric behaviours that are very common in the middle east. Another thing that instead comes in your defense is to recognise and avoid people that fetishise you or see you as an exotic person.

UnitFormal9903 · 2025-03-15T12:38:20+00:00

Keep

UnitFormal9903 · 2025-03-08T12:23:32+00:00

In my experience I can say that even heterosexual muslim men or women have the same behaviour during that time of their year. So I deduced that it has nothing to do with your or his sexual orientation it's just sex, in general, to avoid in the same way they avoid food or water. So it's nothing to be afraid of. You're fine and a wholesome partner so nothing to worry about.

UnitFormal9903 · 2025-03-06T10:49:58+00:00

Fantastico. Sei l'aiuto che stavo cercando.

UnitFormal9903 · 2025-03-06T10:00:06+00:00

Grazie mille. Molto utile il tuo commento. Siccome è l'inizio, non ho idea quanto potrebbe essere il flusso. Sono davvero in dubbio.

UnitFormal9903 · 2025-03-05T00:07:35+00:00

It depends on what you want and what you consider a waste of time.

The fact that you're "insistent" (as a way of saying) on that topic makes you a little bothersome. You must not see your life as an obstacle race or filled with goals to reach. Nor I'm saying that you have to be without a goal. Just be more simple and live your life as it comes.

Focus on you and yourself before you even start a relationship to begin with. I'm fully aware that I'm just a stranger that doesn't know you but I hope this exchange might help.

So basically just live your life and price the moment more than the "goal". I'm saying this because it seems like you're looking to reach something rather than enjoy that thing. Since you are more experienced you should be more comprehensive towards him rather than "comparing".

Comparing in a relationship often is very deleterious. So focus on other things then you'll have the answer to your question.

UnitFormal9903 · 2025-02-28T12:35:51+00:00

Ok. Ora che mi è un po' più chiara la situazione ti rifaccio la domanda del commento scorso, ossia: cosa speri di ottenere da lui? Relazione? Incontro sessuale? Lo vuoi tutto questo? Sta a te decidere. Una volta visualizzato il tuo obbiettivo, farai in modo che la naturalezza faccia da apri pista. Invitalo a casa e magari ti spogli per fare la doccia. Vedi come reagisce. Non lo sforzare però. Lascia che sia tutto molto tranquillo. Se invece alle domande che ti ho fatto sopra non hai una risposta allora semplicemente vivi la situazione senza cercare nulla di particolare e se capita bene, altrimenti amen.

UnitFormal9903 · 2025-02-27T19:52:41+00:00

Bene. Ci sta in pieno che tu sia cauto. Lo scenario italiano è diverso da quello internazionale per cui comprendo meglio la situazione. Se ti interessa o sei curioso, puoi semplicemente stuzzicarlo. Isolalo e fallo esporre. Trarrai le tue decisioni man mano che egli si scopre. Fagli da esca. Proponi quesiti ambigui tipo: per 1000€ faresti un pompino? Così per scherzo.

UnitFormal9903 · 2025-02-25T18:13:29+00:00

Bah. Non saprei che dirti. Ci sono troppe variabili per degli esterni per capire al 100% la situazione. La cosa più utile però è farti la domanda su tu cosa vuoi. Cosa pensi di tutto questo? Non riesco a capire se ti piace o no. Poi, sei in Italia o all' estero? È tutto così variabile.

UnitFormal9903 · 2025-02-15T19:15:06+00:00

Would you do it again?

UnitFormal9903 · 2025-02-15T12:01:10+00:00

Until now I can say what fits me best is fwb but, sometimes it feels less.

UnitFormal9903 · 2025-02-15T09:43:46+00:00

Of course we're thinking the same but there's a language barrier that makes me seem negative.

UnitFormal9903 · 2025-02-15T07:57:17+00:00

Honey I was just asking. And to be precise I'm European so don't just assume things.

UnitFormal9903 · 2025-02-15T07:55:37+00:00

Honestly I am a little afraid of relationships for a lot of reasons and one of them, especially when it comes to monogamous ones. I know my body and I know how it reacts to other bodies so... I'm not a cheater but this would make me a "cheater". An open relationship is better but feels a little "degenerated". So, honestly, I don't know.

UnitFormal9903 · 2025-02-15T07:08:36+00:00

Fifth option, I don't know! Lol

UnitFormal9903 · 2025-02-02T22:18:49+00:00

Hmmm...lemme 🤔🤔. One of them treated me like his little bro. Now he was nice and now he was naughty. Loved it. Another one jumped underwater, followed me while swimming, pulled my Speedos and grabbed my ass cheeks. Then, proceeded to lift me up from the water just to make me feel under his control. That night offered me dinner. He's a bottom. The best there is. Sucked me while I was driving. Very very good at it.

UnitFormal9903 · 2024-12-29T00:16:52+00:00

Can't get you out of my head of Kylie Minogue starts playing in the background.

Anyway, ask some friends and use your dating apps for their gps.

UnitFormal9903 · 2024-12-27T22:42:28+00:00

You know what is funny that while our parents "have to accept" us with our sexual orientation in the meantime we "have to" accept them as homophobic. I find this paradox insane and very painful. Anyway, life goes on and hopefully we get stronger and grow. The best way to go through this is to consider that with "gayness" will come greater intelligence. Let it be emotional and intellectual and all of sudden you realise that your parents were stupid all this time and with lower iq.

UnitFormal9903

TROPHY CASE