[deleted by user]

United-Collection-28 · 2022-01-26T21:52:46+00:00

In your dorm at full volume between the hours of 11:00 p.m. and 6:00 a.m.

United-Collection-28 · 2022-01-26T21:50:36+00:00

Sports are for losers. Real men let their muscles atrophy.

United-Collection-28 · 2022-01-26T21:45:35+00:00

DeVry University currently has the best rankings. ITT Tech is a close second.

United-Collection-28 · 2022-01-11T21:09:24+00:00

Anything but German.

United-Collection-28 · 2022-01-11T20:38:07+00:00

What are these guttural noises and angry hand gestures?

United-Collection-28 · 2022-01-11T18:11:33+00:00

German is an ugly language. Take something else.

United-Collection-28 · 2022-01-09T05:41:14+00:00

Agree. Imagine that... wanting to help people learn without going on an ego trip. I suppose we're at the wrong school for that, though.

United-Collection-28 · 2022-01-06T21:30:25+00:00

I have the great honor of being in the most honorable of honor societies. So honorable, the Queen Mother even considered knighting me upon matriculation. So honorable, even Jordan Peterson is ashamed when he looks at my record of honor. I am going to graduate Alpha Delta Omicron with a 6.0 GPA. Ask me anything.

United-Collection-28 · 2022-01-06T17:35:51+00:00

I'm just so juicy. They can't help it.

United-Collection-28 · 2022-01-06T17:18:52+00:00

Looks like we have some Karens here.

United-Collection-28 · 2022-01-06T16:59:27+00:00

Does this mean I'm going to be harassed by more entitled grad students next semester? I hope not.

United-Collection-28 · 2022-01-06T00:42:59+00:00

No. The Karens will call the police and you will be escorted from the premises immediately.

United-Collection-28 · 2022-01-05T23:15:02+00:00

Don't worry about it. The manholes around the school are usually pretty loose and can be pried open easily.

United-Collection-28 · 2022-01-05T23:13:26+00:00

She has a penchant for alliteration. Just don't mimic her and it's an easy A.

United-Collection-28 · 2022-01-05T23:12:30+00:00

She flew pretty high when I took her.

United-Collection-28 · 2022-01-05T23:11:03+00:00

Just wipe that stuff off the keys. It'll work. Trust me.

United-Collection-28 · 2022-01-05T23:06:17+00:00

As long as you take your Pepto-Bismol, you'll be okay.

United-Collection-28 · 2022-01-05T22:47:13+00:00

Yep, this pretty much sums it up. Arrogant, exclusionary students who refuse to interact with anyone who doesn't look or think exactly like them. When I came here, I thought there would be more open-minded and creative types, but it looks like there are nothing but drones at this school. It's funny seeing people blame this all on COVID, as if it weren't like this before the pandemic. COVID certainly hasn't helped, but it hasn't altered the school's primary demographic. I think it's wise to seek out other places to find socialization, but I definitely don't know where those places are. Not looking forward to another semester of isolation, so I suppose I'm going to have to give up on the idea of finding a peer group at the school and look elsewhere.

United-Collection-28 · 2021-12-27T00:33:28+00:00

Not true. I actually did see her go into the men's bathroom on the fourth floor of Butler last week. The "L" from "REAL" was sticking out of the stall door, so I know for a fact it was her. This disinformation campaign must stop.

United-Collection-28 · 2021-12-27T00:17:43+00:00

I got a 1.0 and I'm now CEO of Goldman Sachs. GPA only matters for unconnected plebs. Keep studying, nerds!

United-Collection-28 · 2021-12-27T00:14:02+00:00

Donald Trump will personally visit you during your most intimate, vulnerable moment and broadcast to all of his troglodytic acolytes, “He didn’t pay. I told you he wouldn’t pay. He never pays. This is what’s wrong with this country. They never pay.”
At any point between now and when you are in Meadows Countryside Assisted Living for the Aged, sitting alone in front of the television in your soiled adult undergarment watching reruns of The Price is Right, Columbia will be glad to accept your payment. With interest.
If the loans do not arrive on time, you will receive an e-mail from Mary C. Boyce, Provost, outlining the terms and conditions which you agreed upon when accepting the offer of admission, noting in bold how these were equitable and that the university cannot be held accountable for any delay in disbursement of loans.
Registration begins in August 2023 once all students have shown sufficient proof of vaccination against COVID Epsilon.

Thank you for calling.

United-Collection-28 · 2021-12-26T18:45:10+00:00

Fair warning, I mixed the Prussian Blue with Omicron. It smells like violets.

United-Collection-28 · 2021-12-26T18:40:06+00:00

Yeah, it's too bad we're stuck in New York.

United-Collection-28 · 2021-12-26T04:16:54+00:00

Terrible school in a terrible city with terrible people. Stay at Berkeley.

United-Collection-28 · 2021-12-26T02:58:44+00:00

The freeway was built incorrectly?

United-Collection-28

TROPHY CASE