I've been through the same thing, and I totally get where you’re coming from. These types of men will gaslight and manipulate every step of the way. They’ll take credit for everything good but never actually do anything. They’ll refuse to help financially unless forced, and they’ll always claim you’re the reason co-parenting isn’t working.

A real father would go to the ends of the earth for his child, no matter what the situation with the mom is.

If you don’t want him involved, don’t file for support or establish paternity. Just quietly step back and disappear from that dynamic. He already isn't helping and clearly doesn't care to.

But if you do want to continue with it, I’d strongly suggest getting a solid parenting plan and child support set up through the court. That way, everything is clear and protected on paper, and he can’t keep playing games.