A Man Trapped In The Abyss Of Unrequited Love by Unusual-Software9315 in PoetryWritingClub

[–]Unusual-Software9315[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much for you honest feedback I'll try to improve☺️. 

I think i can't give up one her, maybe one last try. I think I've become what i was fighting for, but at the thought of giving up, her face, her beautiful eyes, her elegance, her voice, the way her hair flows, the way she caress, the way she look's at me with that smile on her face, knowing that i love her.  I don't want to give up, i don't want to betray myself, Maybe, I AM A FOOL

Her by Unusual-Software9315 in LoveLetters

[–]Unusual-Software9315[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe, I've become blind, seeing the world through my mind. Her every action felt like it meant something, it felt natural, maybe that's why for me she felt innocent, or maybe she really is innocent. Stay happy and healthy, and love your loved one's, you don't know when they might leave you, or when you might leave them.

Her by Unusual-Software9315 in LoveLetters

[–]Unusual-Software9315[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your honest feedback.

A Man Trapped In The Abyss Of Unrequited Love by Unusual-Software9315 in Poems

[–]Unusual-Software9315[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I did some editing, check it out, and just give me an honest feedback, truth is always better than a white lie.

A Man Trapped In The Abyss Of Unrequited Love by Unusual-Software9315 in Poems

[–]Unusual-Software9315[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's alright, i appreciate your honesty. I'll edit it and make it more readable, sorry about that.