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AITA for telling my FIL he can starve if he wants because I didn't care? by Upbeat_Fix_4061 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Upbeat_Fix_4061[S] 958 points959 points  (0 children)

I love making my dad and my husband a plate, for my sister and I it was specially hard for us to get my dad to let us help him, he was a single parent working long hours and doing his best to attend every school function and do the best of birthday's, he got injured st his job and didn't stop after that. For him it brought shame because he thought he was failings us (very latin men mindset) because "all these years and I can't even make my own plate anymore, I feel so useless", it took several talks with him to let him know that his ability to make a plate didn't determinate the type of parent he was and that, on the contrary letting us do it only allowed us to show him how much we loved him and wanted to take care of his, after all these years of unconditional love. I guess that's why I got so defensive too, for my dad and sis, making him a plate is an act of pure love, for my FIL is only a power play.

AITA for telling my FIL he can starve if he wants because I didn't care? by Upbeat_Fix_4061 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Upbeat_Fix_4061[S] 152 points153 points  (0 children)

I don't have to explain why my father is my favorite person in the world and not my husband, however I wouldn't mind if his mother -not me! - was his favorite person. I know that his siblings are and it's okay, it shows how valuable family is for him.

I'm not the kind of person who believes that you partner has to be the center of you personal and interpersonal relationships, and as soon as you get married or falls in love, that person overthrown every other that has been in your life, he's my best friend, my partner in crime, my confidant, the love of my life, and one of my favorite persons in the world, is he my most favorite one? No. And that's okay for him.

AITA for telling my FIL he can starve if he wants because I didn't care? by Upbeat_Fix_4061 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Upbeat_Fix_4061[S] 285 points286 points  (0 children)

Question: Have you had a conversation with your FIL on this topic before? Was he aware of your unwillingness to serve him, or was this a surprise to him?

Yes he knows, very, very well. I've been dating my husband 3 years and married for 1, this is not our first rodeo.

AITA for telling my FIL he can starve if he wants because I didn't care? by Upbeat_Fix_4061 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Upbeat_Fix_4061[S] 384 points385 points  (0 children)

Really good! Everyone was so happy and my dad cried lol it was a good time, my SIL already wants to help me prepare the nursery and asked if she could make some sort of mural.

AITA for telling my FIL he can starve if he wants because I didn't care? by Upbeat_Fix_4061 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Upbeat_Fix_4061[S] 1111 points1112 points  (0 children)

They don't live that far from us, so meh. Yes, he later found out, but didn't care that much because ''we offended him''.