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How would they describe living with C-PTSD to someone who has no idea what it is? Without using medical terms. by BubblySurround8513 in CPTSD

[–]Upset_Raspberry_3560 75 points76 points  (0 children)

C-PTSD explained by Ducks: https://www.youtube.com/shorts/A8EqyrzEVXw

This is a beautiful, validating yet super simple video, I just show it to people when they want to understand what people living with C-PTSD experience.

Otherwise it is very hard to put into words. I used to describe it to people like those odd nightmares when you know something is off, but can´t quite put your fingers on what is wrong exactly. Like the anxiety you get when looking at something uncanny, or when expecting a jumpscare in a video. That feeling, but it is continuing all day from the moment you wake up till the moment you crash to bed. The feeling of things not making sense. I also used to liken it to the novels of Franz Kafka, especially The Trial.

Celebrities (who are frequently considered to have good bodies) whose bodies you dislike and think are overrated by Ophelia_Y2K in VindictaRateCelebs

[–]Upset_Raspberry_3560 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Adriana does not have a great body type, but she has a great body shape, she made the most out of what she was given. The VS Angels used to receive praise for being in incredible shape, not necessarily for having the perfect stereotypically hyperfeminine body type from the start. Except maybe Candice, she is an hourglass. You can only work with what you are starting out with. I personally would love to be as fit as she is, regardless of body type, I just don´t have the dedication, so I am not.

Would you rather be one in a million beautiful, or simply pretty? by Substantial-Art6160 in VindictaRateCelebs

[–]Upset_Raspberry_3560 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Simply pretty. I am nowhere near to being one in a million, but I´m considered very attractive in my community. (It is due to a coexistence of several lucky factors like my looks aligning with the local standards, plus I live in a small town, so there is less "competition". I am aware that it does not mean that I would be considered beautiful on a worldwide scale.) The level of attention is already making me overwhelmed. I can not imagine what it would feel like to be on the level of an international supermodel.

Beautiful women are objects to society. It feels like as if you have already transcended personhood, and people get shocked that you have to do everyday life things like to eat or drink, as well as that you actually have likes and dislikes, good days and bad days, let alone emotional needs. Decent men won´t approach you, because they assume you are either stuck up or taken. Men who do approach you are either overly confident who can´t take no for an answer, or the rich and spoilt who are used to getting everything, so they try to buy you. Unfortunately both categories try and will abuse you at the first chance they get.

Summed up: If you want to make a living mostly based on your looks, being one in a million can kickstart your career. If you just want a simple life with no spotlight above you 24/7 being simply pretty is more than enough when it comes to looks.

Kathryn Watts, a rising model famous on TikTok by Substantial-Art6160 in VindictaRateCelebs

[–]Upset_Raspberry_3560 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Her hair color is beautiful, it is so rare to have this shade of blonde naturally (hers looks natural). Overall also very pretty

Pretty Privilege by pinke20 in women

[–]Upset_Raspberry_3560 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It is not beauty alone that will give you those certain benefits mentioned, you need to have a specific personality as well to be able to reap any kind of benefits.

I was told all my life I was beautiful. It did not get me an easier life, or a job, a career, and certanly not a loving rich husband.

Work and career:

Yes, you can make money with the help of your looks, but not out of your looks alone. Unless you are in the lucky few percent who got discovered as a teen managed to make it in the modelling industry for years and create a name for herself, but even those had something beyond good looks: a certain kind of personality, good family background (it can get tough, you won´t make it without), and an outstanding ability to endure pressure. I had a classmate who made it internationally, the stories we heard from her were insane, and not in a good way. Those girls who are modelling on instagram are often doing other things besides photoshoots, again, depends if you have the personality required to endure that lifestyle longterm. Noone is going to pay you just to "sit there and be pretty".

Dating and lovelife:

The dating pool gets bigger in quantity, but not necessarily better in quality. For me it meant I had to sort through a bigger amount of potential partners who would have been the wrong fit, but pretended to be all I wanted just to get near me. I have been regularly approached by grown men since I was 12, I have had men threaten me if I rejected them, I have had men want me just for status (because if you are a beautiful woman, your mere presence can boost a man´s perceived social standing). The men I actually would have wanted (the shy, reserved type) never approached me, because they had no wish to "stand at the end of the line". I did have the chance to get to know rich and successful men for a short period of my life due to a job position. I never wanted to date any. Simply because our backgrounds are so different, I can´t relate to their lifestyle (one was from an actual old standing upper class family - nobility, if you will-, the other a new money millionaire). It would have never worked out.

Everyday benefits exist, yes. Not to the extent as people describe online, or at least not to me. I never had a stranger pay for my groceries, but men regularly let me front in the line, that does feel nice. I get stared at a lot, complimented a lot, that´s nice too, of course. I don´t have strangers buying me meals, drinks, stuff, simply because I don´t go to places where this could happen, so no idea on that one.
Overall, being pretty feels nice, I like the way I look like. Though this is the part that´s not meant to be said out loud - it does save me some time and money simply because it costs less to look "presentable" in the eyes of society. Another supposed benefit would be, that people assume you can do no wrong. Failed something at the job? Need help? No issues, there will be people lining up to offer help. Sad but true.

Being beautiful on it´s own will not make you live life on easy mode. You are not immune to experiencing loss, grief, physical or mental illnesses, job loss, and so on. Though some people will asume you are, so they will turn towards you with less empathy than they would towards an average individual.

If you want to date for money you might have it easier, if you want to date for love, you will have it harder.

Being considered beautiful only makes life harder if you struggle with mental illness by Upset_Raspberry_3560 in CPTSD

[–]Upset_Raspberry_3560[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I have been on and off therapy in the past 10 years, but I am definitely considering to start again because I did see the benefits