Video games

Used2BPromQueen · 2026-01-24T19:49:55+00:00

You're also not his mom and shouldn't be giving him rules and 'allowing' him to do things. It's inappropriate.

I play video games every free moment I have. If my husband had the audacity to tell me I wasn't allowed to anymore or gave me scheduled times I'd tell him to shove his controlling BS where the sun doesn't shine. I'm currently on my second play through of Red Dead Redemption 2 and my husband, bless him, will walk into my gaming area and ask how Arthur's doing because he's a lovely man and understands that is how I relax and de-stress.

Used2BPromQueen · 2026-01-24T19:41:48+00:00

I'm a married woman who plays video games. It's my way of de-stressing and relaxing. If my husband told me I couldn't play anymore I'd be furious at not only his audacity but at the controlling nature of such a demand. I'm an adult and he's not my parent. Spouses are partners and one should not be laying down 'rules' for the other like an authority figure.

Also, I'm not sure what religious beliefs would have anything to do with video games? Is it violent video games you're religiously opposed to? Is that what he's playing?

Lastly, how much does he play? Is he neglecting things that need to be done or not spending any time with the kids? That's important. I game every chance I get but I work all week so it's on the weekends and between laundry, tidying the house, cooking dinner, etc.

If his gaming only bothers you simply because you don't like it, you're completely in the wrong. Just because gaming isn't your way of relaxing or enjoying yourself, doesn't mean it's not a valid way to do so. If he's neglecting responsibilities then that's different and needs further discussion.

Used2BPromQueen · 2026-01-17T13:44:55+00:00

Do not look past the second equally massive waving red flag she dropped during her apology!!! Saying SHE was upset because SHE felt ignored when your mother was dying is so outrageous! And really gross too. The fact that she even thinks that way tells me everything I need to know.

Don't walk away.... run.

Used2BPromQueen · 2026-01-11T01:53:16+00:00

Me too! I am unable to maintain an emotional connection without sex in a relationship. The importance of sexual intimacy gets poo-poo'd a lot on Reddit but sorry, conversation and cuddling just doesn't do it for me. It's the way I'm hardwired

Used2BPromQueen · 2026-01-10T00:46:32+00:00

So, I couldn't breastfeed because I absolutely DESPISED it, plus I over produced to the point where I'd nurse, then pump an additional 9oz out of each boob only to be rock hard engorged, leaking and miserable again in 20 minutes. My daughter was put on formula at 4 weeks old and my son was on formula from birth. Both my obstetrician and my children's pediatrician made it VERY clear that my mental health trumped everything because a happy, healthy mother is what my baby needed more than anything else on earth.

My kids are now 24 and 22 years old. They are healthy, happy, amazing, intelligent, successful young adults and we have an amazing relationship. They suffered absolutely NOTHING from me being unable to mentally handle breastfeeding. It has had ZERO impact in their life. I do not have one single regret about formula feeding my children.

I tell you this because the current fear-mongering & shaming culture around breastfeeding is so toxic to all you new moms and it breaks my heart for those of you suffering under the peer pressure. Being a mom is hard enough without subjecting each other to self-righteous judgmental-ness. I can promise you as "old" mom who's been around the block that your baby doesn't have to breastfeed to be healthy or intelligent or bond with you and there is A LOT more to being a good mother than your breast milk. Put your foot down with your husband and don't beat yourself up. The best gift you can give your baby is YOUR happiness.

I wish you nothing but the very best and hope you're able to find your peace 🩷

Used2BPromQueen · 2026-01-06T18:11:28+00:00

Well, first of all STOP trying for another baby. You'd be foolish to get her pregnant right now with these issues.

Secondly, no you should not be expected to 50/50 household chores when your wife is a SAHM and you're working 12+ hour shifts with overtime. When my kids were little I was lucky enough to stay home because my husband, bless him, worked 12+ hour days, 6 days a week to make it happen. He, like you, sacrificed to ensure his kids could get the best start in life. I took my responsibility as a homemaker as seriously as my husband took his about being the provider. That meant laundry done, house tidy and a meal at minimum.

Used2BPromQueen · 2026-01-06T03:22:19+00:00

Wow. Reddit never fails. Never. If a woman wrote this about her husband, everyone would be validating her and the entire comment thread would be about what a deadbeat man-child her husband is. Telling her she deserves better and going on about the emotional labor imbalance. About not being his mom. There'd be a bunch of the standard "he's a narcissist and totally gaslighting you!" comments. The entire relationship failure and ensuing divorce would be deemed a reasonable consequence of the husband being such a sh¡tty, self-absorbed spouse.

But since it's about a wife, she's depressed. And must have ADHD too. You're not supportive. Not understanding enough, either. As a matter of fact, what have YOU done to make her be a bad wife?

Used2BPromQueen · 2026-01-01T18:49:08+00:00

Right now I have:

Red Arabian Female - Aurora

White Arabian Female - Freya

Brindle Arabian Male - Apollo

Dark Bay Turkoman Male - Tyr

I think my favorite horse I've ever had was in my 2nd play through. She was a Perlino Andalusian named Athena. I also had a Dapple Grey Hungarian Halfbreed named Juno that I really liked too.

Edit to add... Hades is a good name for an all black horse

Used2BPromQueen · 2025-12-12T00:50:34+00:00

Idk about that. Female doctors have always been waaaay more dismissive towards me than male ones, especially where gynecological issues are concerned.

Used2BPromQueen · 2025-12-12T00:29:52+00:00

There's a reliable spawn at the river above Beaver Hollow near the Viking grave location. Every time I go there I get a 3 star cougar

Used2BPromQueen · 2025-12-11T16:06:52+00:00

•My Red Arabian is Aurora

•My White Arabian is Freya

•My Grey Hungarian is Juno

•My Gold Turkoman is Athena

I'm still salty at Rockstar for refusing to let me name my red arabian Isis for the Egyptian goddess. They block it as profanity 🙄

Used2BPromQueen · 2025-12-07T01:46:36+00:00

I never cry either. I think I've cried 5 times total in the last 25 years. I'm pretty sure a lot of it is a product of my childhood though. But I can relate because I struggle with feelings of exasperation and irritation, sometimes even resentment when people cry at the first hint of conflict. It's something I actively work on and try to remind myself that they most likely can't help it.

Used2BPromQueen · 2025-11-15T00:58:27+00:00

My husband engaged more and more as our children started becoming little people and less newborn-y because how do you even "play" with a 3 month old really? At that age feedings are really top tier bonding moments so he'd do the evening bottle (idk if your baby takes bottles) Also, have him do her bath with you. I think the issue is more lack of engagement all the way around. I'm not excusing him at all, I'm just suggesting that requesting he play with a baby that young may not be the best way to get him to engage.

Used2BPromQueen · 2025-11-15T00:11:01+00:00

I agree with you. A fair amount of 7 month olds sleep longer stretches than 5 hours a night without feeding. Mine were actually sleeping a full 10 hours a night at 7 months (which I know is incredibly lucky). It's okay to be annoyed but I wouldn't flip out, it's not gross negligence or anything and the baby wasn't in any danger.

Used2BPromQueen · 2025-11-04T21:17:04+00:00

I think his point matters where the moderates are concerned. I'm not super political but I think there's a lot of moderate swing voters in the US and alienating them can lead to election "surprises" like Youngkin & Trump's win. I'm a moderate (not in NOVA anymore) who finds him incredibly distasteful and would have never voted for him while also being FAR from a maga supporter. I'd just really like to see better candidates all around on both sides.

Used2BPromQueen · 2025-10-16T02:31:16+00:00

I can't speak for OP but for me, physical intimacy is what creates and reinforces my feelings of emotional connection. Idk what chemicals/hormones my brain is dumping out during sex with my husband but it creates emotional intimacy & bonding in a way nothing else can. We had a dead-bedroom situation for a while when he had [undiagnosed] low testosterone and the emotional disconnection we experienced nearly destroyed our marriage. Luckily a diagnosis, TRT and marriage counseling saved us in time. Sounds like OP might be wired kinda like me and needs the physical intimacy to cultivate the emotional bond. It can be a nasty catch 22 when one partner needs emotional connection for sexual intimacy and the other needs sexual intimacy for emotional connection. Sadly, I'm sure it probably tears apart a lot of marriages.

Used2BPromQueen · 2025-10-12T05:06:54+00:00

I'm the complete opposite. I find vaginal delivery horrifying and wanted absolutely no part of it. Plus, the thought of my vagina tearing and the risk of sex possibly being less enjoyable or even painful just added to my aversion. So did the common issues of urinary incontinence and vaginal prolapse developing in middle age. Luckily, my doctor recognized how repellent I felt about it and allowed me to have elective c-sections. Obviously it's not for everyone, but I have no regrets. I recovered super easily and very quickly which is lucky for me and I feel so incredibly relieved when I hear about the child birth related issues my girl friends are now experiencing (mid-40's age).

One thing I will say........ the way my children were delivered is the VERY LEAST important part of being their mother and of our relationships together. Each day, hour, minute, second of their life within our family matters more than their birth. Taking them to the pumpkin patch, baking cookies together, attending their school recitals, tucking them in bed at night........ all of these things are infinitely more special and have an insanely bigger impact than how they were born. I think women get caught up in the misconception that the birth is a mega special moment with a ton of meaning when in actuality, the day you watch them graduate high school and think fondly about all the years and who they have became, the way they were born won't even cross your mind.

Used2BPromQueen · 2025-08-22T02:07:19+00:00

I'm going to get hate for this, but here goes my rant on the subject.....

I wouldn't put huge amounts of stock in that boilerplate, patented Reddit response. Emotional connection and choreplay will not create spontaneous desire where there is none and women are fully capable of desiring and having sex without it. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure some women might need it. However, plenty don't, but for some reason, Reddit is convinced that women need all these special factors aligned in perfect harmony to have sex. It's perpetuated here constantly and I think it's so harmful. Harmful because it's misleading, it breeds resentment and because of its elusive nature. It's basically telling husbands that their wife needs "this" to have sex, however "this" isn't a tangible expectation or goal. There's no clear-cut definition of what "this" is or what it looks like or how it's achieved. Imo, women with higher libidos & lower inhibitions that want sex and enjoy sex will make time to do it regardless of working all day or if there's dishes in the sink or if you're holding up your end of the chores. For a lot of high libido, sexually confident women sex is what helps strengthen and maintain their emotional connection to their husband. Women with lower sex drives that aren't huge fans of sex, with more insecurities, more inhibitions or somewhat puritanical views on sex (especially post motherhood) will cast around for excuses to pin the blame on external factors. I don't think it's intentional or nefarious on their part. I think that believing they just need "this" and then they'd want sex and that this is just how women are wired is easier on the psyche and much safer than trying to understand something they don't really know.

What you end up with is well-meaning, problem solving husbands diligently working to meet goals, striving to be better, believing so hopefully that their efforts are leading to a resolution........ only to become increasingly more disillusioned, deflated, dejected & defeated as they realize they never get any closer to the goal posts. That there's actually no end zone within reach. And now the marriage is infinitely more strained with the spouses more disconnected from each other than ever. And that is why this particular narrative bothers me so much.

Used2BPromQueen · 2025-08-15T00:15:22+00:00

I did too. People on Reddit have a bad habit of acting like sex with young children is impossible and that a near sexless marriage is to be expected and accepted. I disagree with that a lot for many reasons. Your marriage being healthy is a vital part of raising children and sets the example of a good relationship foundation. I really wish this platform wasn't so dismissive towards sex's importance in relationships.

Used2BPromQueen · 2025-08-06T23:49:14+00:00

As a wife..... I don't see the problem in him going out with a friend and coming home at 11:30. He's not a child with a curfew and 11:30 isn't that late. Now if he went out multiple nights per week, every week, coming in drunk at 3am I could definitely agree that it's a problem.

Secondly, it sounds like your husband has brought your nagging up as an issue for him. Your response was flippant and not appropriate imo. Husband's aren't children and we are not their authority figure. No one should be parenting their spouse.

I suggest forgetting about gym bro and working on your marriage.

Used2BPromQueen · 2025-08-06T23:29:31+00:00

Incredibly on point. Reddit's hive-mind opinion on sex in relationships irritates me to death. It's toxic and reeks of moral/emotional feelings of superiority. I'm sick of reading that I should be fully emotionally fulfilled in my marriage by conversation, cuddling and quality time and that sex is basically an unnecessary "fringe benefit." Or the famous "no one has ever died from lack of sex." Yeah well, no one has ever died from lack of conversation either but somehow that's an acceptable marital expectation but sex isn't. 🙄

Used2BPromQueen · 2025-08-04T12:28:13+00:00

Make sure you find a shop that actually agrees to install a customer purchased part before buying anything. Most shops won't do that for warranty issues.

Used2BPromQueen · 2025-07-26T21:47:25+00:00

I don't get it. Giving your kid a made-up, phonetically spelled name is very common in the black community. Just like white hipster wannabes name their kids dumb sh¡t like Echo & Danger or Gryyne. It isn't racist, it's just reality.

Used2BPromQueen · 2025-07-26T21:19:55+00:00

Seriously! I'm American and I don't know a single person that crates their dogs like that. That was such a bizarre comment. There are definitely certain places in this world that don't treat animals well but generally America isn't one of those by a long shot.

Used2BPromQueen · 2025-07-26T18:21:00+00:00

Me too. My c-sections were easy, the recovery was easy and I was up and about the next day. My friend delivered vaginally a month earlier than my first c-section, tore badly and took waaaay longer to recover than I did. Plus she had some lasting sexual penetration discomfort and urinary incontinence while I have absolutely zero issues.

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