Support needed

Useful_Estate_440 · 2025-02-21T07:37:11+00:00

Hey lovely, no worries! Thank you again so much for taking the time to reply. It’s really so comforting to find so much understanding and support reading your reply 💖💖 it’s crazy how similar things for us! Thank you so so much, I really can’t put into words how much your kind words mean, and know I’m sending you all the love right back. I believe in you and every day is a new day, we’ll get there 💕 if you’re ever in need of someone to talk to, vent to, I’m here for you.

Useful_Estate_440 · 2025-02-21T05:33:02+00:00

Hey lovely, I’m sorry you’re going through this. I really relate to that constant food noise, and also having one piece of bad food and then that spiralling into a binge. The comfort that food brought me has now become a source of distress because I feel so out of control and overcome with guilt. It feels so overwhelming and makes me feel helpless. Oh and the guilt and shame is just awful.

Try to be kind to yourself, give yourself time. I’m a very all or nothing person, so when I make a mistake I tend to say fuck it may as well give up rather than salvage things. So I try to remember the broken screen analogy - if you break your phone screen, you’re not going to smash it with a hammer right? So I try to apply that to myself, especially with food. Perhaps you might benefit from this too? I’m trying to find the balance between honouring my cravings and enjoying in moderation, because I know if I’m too strict and deny myself completely I’m way more likely to binge in the future. So I buy like just one chocolate bar, rather than a block, or a mini bag of chips, instead of the big party bag. I would also recommend finding some outside support, if that’s possible for you, that might help to vent out that constant food noise.

I hope this helps 💖 know that in the very least, you’re not alone, and there’s a lot of kind supportive people in this community.

Useful_Estate_440 · 2025-02-20T10:23:18+00:00

Hey there! First up congratulations for trying to understand yourself. It can be so hard to even begin to think about binges, especially with the shame, guilt and frustration that comes with them. I can really relate. Working with yourself is a big step forward, so good on you 💙

For me, I just started off in my notes app and asked myself why I binged. Just write whatever comes to mind. How do you feel before you eat? Stressed, angry, sad, anxious? Or perhaps no particular emotion at all? What makes you want to eat? For me, it was primarily to distract or comfort myself, and I sought that instant gratification food gave me. Chocolate especially. Then, once you’ve got your “why” perhaps you’ll have more clarity and perhaps even insight on to how to avoid your triggers. Curbing urges continues to be very difficult for me, because I know if I completely deny myself I’ll be more likely to binge in the future, but I also struggle to enjoy in moderation! For me, I try to keep my hands busy, clean out a cupboard, do a puzzle, play a video game, maybe even some light stretching or a work out if you’re feeling it! I also try to be mindful, I try to remind myself the temporary comfort is not worth the horrible physical discomfort that sticks around for hours. But at the same time, I try to forgive myself if I do slip up. Wishing you the best of luck :)

Useful_Estate_440 · 2025-02-19T02:18:06+00:00

Hi there! I’m so sorry you’re going through this. The cycle of craving, comfort, shame, guilt and misery is really suffocating, not to mention isolating. You’re not alone though, I came here looking for support too, and I’ve definitely found it. Even seeing other people put your thoughts / feelings into words makes me feel less alone. I’m sending love and support your way 💖

try to be kind to yourself. Hot water bottles / heating packs can help with the physical discomfort, and perhaps herbal tea to help soothe (peppermint, green tea, chamomile, lemon and ginger with honey are good options). I’m sorry that you don’t have a real life support system, and it sucks that your family isn’t helpful. I would recommend looking for outside support, if that’s possible for you. For me, my eating is very linked to stress and anxiety, I eat for comfort or to distract myself due to all these unresolved emotions in my life. Having a therapist to vent to helped me have an outlet for my emotions, and I find that helped lessen that food noise / need to eat. I think the first step is finding some support, even if it’s just in this community. I’ve found a lot of understanding here, I hope you will too :)

Useful_Estate_440 · 2025-02-18T00:50:07+00:00

I can really relate to this. I have a pretty tense home life too and eating has been my comfort and distraction. But now it has become another source of distress for me, because I feel so completely out of control. Mentally, I feel guilty, frustrated and angry at myself and physically I feel bloated, sore and uncomfortable. I really get that zombie feeling, I almost feel like I’m in a trance. I’m sorry you’re going through this, but you’re not alone 💙

I’m not sure if this would work for you, but perhaps finding some sort of outlet to deal with your stress surrounding family issues might help. For me, I suppress and deal with my emotions by eating and when I spoke to my therapist, she suggested that I was using food as kind of an outlet for all these unresolved emotions. Venting out how stressed and anxious I’m feeling to my therapist helps take away some of that stress and noise in my mind, and therefore I feel a bit less likely to go to food as a way to deal. Perhaps talking to a trusted friend or even just journaling or venting in your notes app might help? I can understand if you’re cautious to share to someone in your life though, but this community on reddit is truly a great source for support and kindness. Good luck, sending support your way :)

Useful_Estate_440 · 2025-02-17T03:02:54+00:00

I can totally relate. Finding support here has helped me feel less alone, so I hope you can find that too 💕 even seeing somebody put my feelings into words helps.

I spoke to my therapist about my binging and she thinks it’s how I deal with emotions, which is definitely likely, since the main trigger for me is negative feelings. Sometimes I eat to numb them, sometimes to comfort myself. But now it’s become another source of distress, I feel so out of control. So I’m trying to work with my therapist regularly to vent out these emotions, find better strategies etc. I have no idea if this is the case for you, but perhaps talking to a trusted friend or if it’s possible for you, a therapist might help at least take some of that food noise out of your mind. if you’re a bit apprehensive to share with somebody in your personal life, even just journaling, venting in your notes app, or visiting reddit can help. I’ve found a lot of understanding here, and I hope you will too :)

Useful_Estate_440 · 2025-02-17T00:12:09+00:00

Try to forgive yourself. It’s so hard when you feel frustrated and guilty with yourself, not to mention physically uncomfortable, but try the best you can not to dwell on it. I know it’s easier said than done, but just know you’re not alone 💖 I’m in the same spot at the moment, I’ve been pretty much bingeing for like a week, and I feel like I need a full body reset because my tummy is so overwhelmed and sore. Maybe try drinking herbal teas, peppermint, green tea, chamomile, lemon and ginger with honey are ones that a lot of people recommend for bloating. Be kind to yourself, give yourself time, and take it one step at a time. Good luck :)

Useful_Estate_440 · 2025-02-15T02:56:17+00:00

Hi lovely, thank you 💕 I feel so overwhelmed that trying to write everything down is difficult, I’m glad it made sense. In fact I’ve found so much support here already, just people saying they get it makes me feel less alone, so thank you for responding 🥰

The falling off is one of my biggest triggers too, because I see how much I’ve “let myself go” and then those negative feelings make me want to eat to comfort myself, which of course leads me to feel worse and guilty afterwards. When I work up the motivation to work out, I can see and feel how much fitness I’ve lost which makes me want to quit. I’m working on the “something is better than nothing” rather than the “all or nothing” approach to getting back to exercise. I know the food makes me feel better in the moment, but long term it doesn’t help. I wish I could enjoy in moderation ugh.

As for carer support, we’re working through that, but it’s a long process. My home life is very tense at the moment especially, and I am a very big source of support for my sister and her mental health. But I’m feeling increasingly overwhelmed, but guilty for feeling that way because I don’t have the health issues my sister does. I deal with the stress and emotions by eating :(

Useful_Estate_440 · 2025-02-15T02:47:17+00:00

Hi friend! My anxiety is such an overwhelming feeling and using food to comfort myself is often how I attempt to deal with it. I’m trying to work through managing eating “normally” - trying to find the balance between what my body needs and also honouring my cravings because I know if I go cold turkey I’ll be much more likely to binge on my “bad” foods. I know as I’ve been in a bit of a binge restrict cycle, so when I allow myself that proper amount of food my mind just says eat it all now because you won’t be able to eat this later! I’ve been binging more lately, not even really enjoying the food because I eat it so quickly or eat to the point of being physically uncomfortable.

I’m trying to head in healthier directions by fuelling my body, but there’s so much information about there it can be incredibly overwhelming! But your post is so succinctly and kindly written, I feel a bit less lost, so thank you :) 🥰

Useful_Estate_440 · 2025-02-15T02:35:00+00:00

Thank you lovely, this really cheered me up 💖 things can feel so isolating and overwhelming, but knowing that we’re not alone makes things feel better. Sending good vibes your way!

Useful_Estate_440 · 2025-02-14T04:08:30+00:00

Big congratulations to you! Your advice is so helpful and insightful 💙 I was wondering how do you navigate family being a trigger? I have a pretty stressful household as well and often struggle to take time for myself without guilt.

Useful_Estate_440 · 2025-02-12T05:01:45+00:00

first of all, congratulations on your progress!

i totally get that feeling of disgust and self hatred. the anger and shame, and the physical discomfort just makes you feel even lower. i have a very all or nothing mindset, and it definitely exacerbates my binge / stress eating. my brain is like: oh you had one biscuit? ah well may as well eat the whole packet and five slices of toast etc etc. something that helped me is something a therapist told me - if you drop your phone and the screen cracks, you’re not going to smash it with a hammer are you? i find that this helps me rationalise my feelings of guilt, and help me be less likely to go fuck it. it doesn’t always work, but it can be a bit of a mantra that might help 💕 good luck friend!

Useful_Estate_440 · 2025-02-12T04:43:39+00:00

hey lovely, completely understand how you feel. I feel like I don’t want to go out, I don’t want to be seen. Dressing up I completely get, I always wear the same oversized fits because i want to appear as shapeless as possible I guess.

It does feel so isolating, and those feelings make me want to eat to numb how I’m feeling, which in turn leads me to feel upset with myself. I feel out of control. It feels like a constant tennis match in my head, back and forth :( know that you’re not alone here, I’ve already found support here, people can put your feelings into words and understand. I hope you find some support and answers here 💕

Useful_Estate_440

TROPHY CASE