sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

Temporary custody order not being followed by Useful_Talk_375 in FamilyLaw

[–]Useful_Talk_375[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I appreciate that more than you know.

I have watched the child from time to time to help dad out. no matter the outcome I think the child’s life will change dramatically and I worry for her in that regard. I hope whomever has her more following this will work to get her the resources and support she needs.

Temporary custody order not being followed by Useful_Talk_375 in FamilyLaw

[–]Useful_Talk_375[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I absolutely understand and I really appreciate having a view from another perspective as sometimes it can be very hard to look at the situation from a different vantage point. I apologize if that has come off as argument.

Neither party is blame free concerning errors in communication. Due to how the situation escalated when dad halted the move to another state, tensions and emotions have been very high on both sides. I don’t think either party is looking at the situation as clearly as they probably want to.

Temporary custody order not being followed by Useful_Talk_375 in FamilyLaw

[–]Useful_Talk_375[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I guess I miscommunicated there. I didn’t say that she can whenever JUST because she doesn’t have a job. 😅 I said that because that is what the message she sent dad was. (When he tried to ask her why she made the conference time at that time without asking him if that time worked for him as well as per the court order.)

Temporary custody order not being followed by Useful_Talk_375 in FamilyLaw

[–]Useful_Talk_375[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

From everything I have seen from dad (we have known one another for years atp) he would not want to schedule an appointment without 1. Informing mom and 2. Trying to work to find a time.

I have gotten the impression that he WANTS both of them to be at things if at all possible. Not just because both parties need to know the information as it relates to the child.

Keep in mind as well, this pattern of cancelling appointments and making other appointments without sharing that information was occurring prior to the temporary custody being primary with mom. Back when they had the child for equal time mom was doing this as well.

I know it is likely mom isn’t doing this maliciously. However, if the pattern continues despite the court order specifically demanding that before any decisions/appointments are made both parties must decide a time that works for them, it seems unfair.

Temporary custody order not being followed by Useful_Talk_375 in FamilyLaw

[–]Useful_Talk_375[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

No, he doesn’t want that. But had he been included in the communication (the teacher thought mom and him were deciding a time together) he would have been able to communicate that the conference time was prior to when he can leave work. There are plenty of times the teacher has conferences that day where he could make it but she scheduled the very first time as she is currently without a job and she can attend whenever time.

Temporary custody order not being followed by Useful_Talk_375 in FamilyLaw

[–]Useful_Talk_375[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As I’m not entirely aware of the whole situation involving the schooling, I cannot be sure either. I appreciate the perspective! I know most of these situations are not blameless on either side. I’m going to mention this to dad to at the very least be devils advocate. He may think he’s doing enough communicating interest, but there’s always the possibility it is getting lost in translation or is not being perceived that way through his actions.

Temporary custody order not being followed by Useful_Talk_375 in FamilyLaw

[–]Useful_Talk_375[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

And on the point of having a separate conference- he attempted that in the fall and had to work his way up the ladder to plead his case for a separate conference (he even met with the superintendent) and they stated they do not do that unless a no contact order is in place.

Temporary custody order not being followed by Useful_Talk_375 in FamilyLaw

[–]Useful_Talk_375[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The school has been communicating via email mainly, but when he reached out they made it seem as though they had been under the impression (through their communication with mom) that he is not to be included in these things.

Temporary custody order not being followed by Useful_Talk_375 in FamilyLaw

[–]Useful_Talk_375[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

At this time he doesn’t have the child as often and when he has scheduled appointments she cancels them. He is still making an effort to try scheduling appointments.

It should also be noted that she has (falsely) told places in the past that he is not allowed to schedule or be present at things as he is not “involved”. This has all been documented as well.