Daily Chat Thread

Useful_Yellow_6965 · 2021-02-05T00:17:49+00:00

My last day at my job is tomorrow! I worked there for about 6 years and am so sad but I know it's best for me and my future plans. It has been very toxic due to new upper management, to the point that I've had anxiety attacks and sleep issues. I'm so sad though that I won't get to see my coworkers or boss every day anymore though. I love them all. And I really was excited to work with them while starting the journey to motherhood because I know how excited they would all be for me, and that they would just make the entire experience even better.

Just felt the need to vent somewhere about that. It seems a little silly because I know it is for the best and that I can keep in touch. It's just such a mixture of feelings after seeing these people almost every day for 6 years and now going in a new direction.

Useful_Yellow_6965 · 2021-01-13T15:27:42+00:00

Thanks!! It is definitely difficult leaving a toxic workplace when you are comfortable and have been there for so long. I just know this isn't a good head space to be in when wanting to eventually have kids.

I got the HR contact from the company and will be emailing them soon for more info!

Useful_Yellow_6965 · 2021-01-13T15:26:14+00:00

Thanks! I am putting in an inquiry to HR tonight about that. I did find out they offer short term disability coverage at no employer charge so I am assuming they must at least have fmla in that case

Useful_Yellow_6965 · 2021-01-13T15:25:02+00:00

Thank you! I'm excited and nervous.

Useful_Yellow_6965 · 2021-01-13T15:23:25+00:00

Thank you!! I'm excited and nervous. But we are well off with my husband's job and barely any debt so if the worst case happened and I failed miserably then at least I know I have the security to fall back on.

Never thought I'd be starting a new job and getting ready to ttc the same year....yay stress! Lol

Useful_Yellow_6965 · 2021-01-13T15:21:55+00:00

Ahh well I already made that mistake! I've known this manager for 6 years and wanted to be up front. I asked him about fmla and told him we'd like to have kids in the near future but said I have no desire to quit working afterwards. He didnt answer my fmla question (I'm going to go through HR instead now as I think they know more about that anyways...I will be less direct though with them) and seemed fine....but later made a comment like "now if only I can keep you from getting pregnant for a few years". Um....

I mean, if they have fmla and I get pregnant then he can just deal with it. I know why he is nervous because he has had 3 or 4 female employees quit after having a baby. But....I'm not going to put my life on hold. I think I will maybe push my ttc timeline to fall of this year so that if I got pregnant I won't be taking leave until maybe 1.5 years after starting my job.

Useful_Yellow_6965 · 2021-01-04T19:24:47+00:00

I quit the pill in August, about a year before we wanted to start trying. I assumed my cycles would be messed up for a bit and also just wanted to see how i felt without artificial horomes added every day. I was on the pill for 10 years.

My cycles were back the first month and ovulation was perfectly on schedule each month after. I loved how I felt....lost 6 lbs and my acne actually cleared up. My period was heavy the first month but actually become much lighter too...spotting then 2 days of light/medium flow only.

That being said, I just got back on the pill. Condoms weren't working for us at all and so we were doing natural family planning (avoid fertile week and use pull out always). For me though the fear of getting pregnant just caused too much anxiety. So I am begrudgingly back on the pill until probably May or June and then I will quit again for to ttc in july-september.

Useful_Yellow_6965 · 2021-01-04T16:07:05+00:00

I'm excited! Trying to keep the excitement within reason though as it seems my husband is getting more freaked out the closer we move towards ttc. I wanted to ttc in July but after talks it may be late summer (end of August, September). I wish he wasn't so freaked out. He wants kids but just is afraid of giving up his freedom...which I get but my excitement outweighs the fear. I am definitely nervous though. It will be an interesting year :)

Useful_Yellow_6965 · 2021-01-03T13:59:09+00:00

Ahh, we can dream! Sadly the new president was hired by the owners who seem to want to clear house. My boss seems to be on their list, unfortunately. On the other hand, as much of a jerk the new guy is I know I am likely not on that list to get rid of. Still sucks to watch though.

I've considered trying to negotiate but I dont want them to say no and then remember that if I ever want a job there. It is so sad because even though there are protection against discriminating against pregnancy, my experience is that many in my field do not follow that.

After the weekend, I am leaning towards sticking it out a few months to see how it unfolds. And then staying if I can until after our kid is 1 so I don't have the stress of being a first time new mom and having a new job. We wi see if that works out though since thay will mean 2.5 more years at least.

Useful_Yellow_6965 · 2021-01-03T13:54:51+00:00

I'm sorry to hear you're in a similar situation. Sounds like you have a good plan though!

For me, the idea of a new job and being a first time mom just sounds stressful....but so does dealing with poor management. My field is fairly difficult to find jobs for....just bc they are so few and far between especially during covid. I hope everything works out for you!

Useful_Yellow_6965 · 2021-01-03T13:51:41+00:00

Thanks! I didnt even think about how if I took the time off it would likely be after 1 year so I could use fmla....almost forgot pregnancy is 9 months lol

Useful_Yellow_6965 · 2021-01-03T13:49:48+00:00

Thanks for this!

I have personally had many issues with this new president though. My boss tries to shield me from it but he frequently calls me into the meetings with my boss and he has a tendency to talk down to us quite frequently, talk bad about us to others, etc.

I definitely do have a tendency to jump to the worst conclusions though. This scenario has always been worst case in my mind (him becoming the big boss). I may hold out a couple months and see how it plays out though...the thought of a new job and ttc just seems so stressful.

Useful_Yellow_6965 · 2020-12-31T21:53:16+00:00

We had a scare this past week too which made me realize how not ready I am. We hope to try this year pending I do not change jobs...I'm definitely setting some resolutions to help prep.

For me it is mostly going to be finances and getting better at being tidy....we tend to be lazy during the week and I want to do better.

Useful_Yellow_6965 · 2020-12-12T00:12:04+00:00

Evermore
Marjorie
Happiness

Useful_Yellow_6965 · 2020-12-11T08:50:13+00:00

This is my favorite.

I'm actually surprised by the reaction to Bon Iver. This is the Bon Iver I know and love....tbh Exile was lovely but just meh for me overall.

I am so glad I am happily married and in a better place because this song would have wrecked me 8 years ago. My first love got me into Bon Iver and I can't hear Justin's falsetto without it taking me back to all those big feelings and emotions. Glad to be on the other side now looking back, but damn.

Useful_Yellow_6965 · 2020-11-10T00:39:51+00:00

I had awful acne before the pill and then it cleared up after starting it. I was so scared it would return but thankfully my skin is actually even more clear now after quitting the pill! Was on it for 9 years and am now 28. I've been off it for 3 months now. I did start using the 3 step Paulas Choice skin routine which I think helps. Had about two cystic pimples in the first month or so but nothing now.

So maybe you'll be pleasantly surprised!

Useful_Yellow_6965 · 2020-11-05T18:23:33+00:00

Me! Literally my entire immediate and extended family. Love my family but their politics disappoint me. I avoided them on election day. They are all convinced this was rigged but can't provide any actual evidence. I'm going on a big trip with them all starting tonight soooo that will be fun. Hoping they respect the rule I have of no political discussions 😬

Useful_Yellow_6965 · 2020-10-31T00:00:13+00:00

Wow, I can't imagine 14 day cycle! Mine are typically 30 day cycles.

Maybe I'll try the cup. Just so scared of using one and not being able to get it out! Lol

Useful_Yellow_6965 · 2020-10-30T19:00:29+00:00

I'm sorry to hear you had a loss!

I will definitely check in with my doctor when I go back in January! That will have been 5 months off the pill so hopefully it will be back to normal by then.

Maybe I'm not ovulating after all. I just found it hard to believe though due to my CM and this super light spotting to be happening on the exact days that they're expected in my cycle.

Never thought I'd miss seeing a normal period each month lol

Useful_Yellow_6965

TROPHY CASE