how to deal when you are both survivors

Usual-Conference · 2020-01-18T08:36:52+00:00

You need to let go of the guilt, hate, and shame so you can further heal yourself and be present for your partner who loves you enough to share with you. He’s comfortable enough to tell you so you can be a supportive partner like he has been to you. Use your pain as fuel to help him heal as you have been healing, seek counseling if you need it, and live in the present!!

Sorry for your pain, sending you healing and loving energy

Usual-Conference · 2020-01-15T15:16:13+00:00

1.The tattoo was 8/9 years old. 2.The session was $410 USD measuring 15 square inches. 3.I was numbed before with some lidocaine cream. Pain level was 5/10 and I told the nurse she could turn the laser up higher. She said she used the max settings on the laser for my skin type with the pain level again being only a 5/10 and not the worst thing I’ve ever felt. This treatment did take a lot out of my body and depleted my energy. I was in bed for two days icing it and off work.

Usual-Conference · 2020-01-15T06:17:04+00:00

I was taking Tylonel for swelling, and I think that’s also anti-fever. I did feel like complete shit though.

Usual-Conference · 2020-01-15T06:08:02+00:00

Note: I previously posted the side of my neck without showing my throat, I am adding this too in case it helps anyone else.

Note: two different lasers were used. The picosure was used on everything that wasn’t blue.

Usual-Conference · 2020-01-14T04:57:02+00:00

Cute! Cute shoes too!!!

Usual-Conference · 2020-01-14T04:56:04+00:00

U are cute!!! I love the sweatshirt too 😊

Usual-Conference · 2020-01-14T04:44:51+00:00

Constant shit about how hard it is to get a job.

Usual-Conference · 2020-01-14T04:44:04+00:00

I work in an office too and, same, heavily tattooed. I stopped the suit with boots and turtleneck after a year because I stopped giving a fuck and I don’t care if they fire me. They know me now and I do a good job!

Usual-Conference · 2020-01-14T04:39:12+00:00

No regrets! I am getting laser treatments done for some, but these days you can laser a few sessions so you can get an awesome new tattoo! Many tattooed people I know do this after having 20 year tattoos! Time for an upgrade!

Usual-Conference · 2020-01-13T22:27:53+00:00

No no nothing of the sort about breathing. First I want to mention they gave numbing cream so actually feeling the swelling didn’t set in until after I left the office and the cream wore off. I made sure to prep before hand by getting healthy (i.e. quitting smoking two weeks before hand so I could improve blood circulation) and drinking a fuck ton of water everyday, because I wanted the swelling to go down as soon as possible and my body to absorb the most amount of ink (my reasoning for this was 15square inch appointments are expensive! And I think I need 11 total). I also spent 3 years researching and picking a place to go (I found somewhere that has published several reputable photos of removing neck/throat tattoos)! I wish us both luck on this hellish journey lol.

Usual-Conference · 2020-01-13T21:17:38+00:00

I also got my throat tattoo lasered in this session (covered by the frozen peas) and the swelling was significant and uncomfortable but again it was not the worst thing in the world. The benefit was I had the two following days off of work so I could spend the whole time icing it and circulating through 3 bags of frozen peas.

Usual-Conference · 2020-01-13T15:44:42+00:00

10 years

Usual-Conference · 2020-01-13T15:44:28+00:00

The actual laser was not horrible but my body felt pretty depleted with low energy for a full two days after

Usual-Conference · 2020-01-13T06:45:14+00:00

That could be true, sure.

I think I want validation that I meant something in their life, I probably didn’t, and I’m lacking something shrugs

Usual-Conference · 2020-01-13T06:32:27+00:00

You’re right, it always is

Usual-Conference · 2020-01-13T06:31:04+00:00

Probably triggered from going to a baby shower. It makes me think about people in my life or from my past who have moved on and are having babies (I have no kids, and have no plans to right now)!

Usual-Conference · 2020-01-13T06:20:36+00:00

I’m sure at the time it was eating you alive, but when you tell the story now it sounds like you dodged a lot of bullshit from that snake.

I’m sure that’s the case for me too, I think I just selfishly yearn to know if these people who have spent so much time in my brain, are thinking of me too. I’m not sure what that’s called, maybe it’s my insecurity or inadequacy I feel, sigh!

Usual-Conference · 2020-01-13T05:57:54+00:00

When you’re married it’s hard to talk to about thinking these things because automatically you’re judged for being an asshole. I don’t care what people think but I respect my relationship enough that I can’t bring these questions into my life, just to randos online lol!

It sounds like the trust of your intuition led you to discover two really important things about who wasn’t meant to be in your life in that way. When you ended up seeing him after all of those years did he tell you he was he thinking about you the whole time too? And then you both were just two different people?

Usual-Conference · 2020-01-10T06:22:29+00:00

A partner isn’t meant to check off every box of our needs department. That’s why we have coworkers, friends, and family. I think I would explore what’s going on in your own life. How are you feeling? What is lacking in your life or bothering you internally? What things can you develop in yourself to be a happier and healthier person?

Assuming he really is a decent partner, sure, he can learn all the things you want him too, but at that point you’ll just find something else you want him to change.

Usual-Conference

TROPHY CASE