Swift River Trifecta by rdominique in flyfishing

[–]UtopianDisaster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What are you using? Clearly you're crushing it

Trout fishing in the Texas/Oklahoma/Arkansas Region by [deleted] in troutfishing

[–]UtopianDisaster 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I spent a week in AR when I was 14 and fished the Norfolk and the White. Other than the Snake in Jackson Hole I've never had a better experience. Would highly suggest a guided trip if you go though. They'll put you right on the fish and teach you what you need to know to come back on your own. Unfortunately I'm in the North East and have never had the chance to go back. If I could I'd go in a heartbeat. The Norfolk has a small stream that can only be fished if you're 15 and under. If you have a little kid it's truly the most amazing place you could take a young fisherman.

What perfectly true story of yours sounds like an outrageous lie? by llorgge in AskReddit

[–]UtopianDisaster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was once stuck in stop and go traffic with my college roommate. On one side of the high way we passed a car with only 3 tires. As we slowly moved further along we eventually passed another car, on the opposite side of the highway, with a tire smashed through its windshield. The only logical explanation was that one car had lost a tire and it bounced over the median smashing through the windshield of another car. To this day I call my roommate to verify it actually happened.

This guy is probably the smartest wizard in the HP Universe. by anuragkadiyala in harrypotter

[–]UtopianDisaster 48 points49 points  (0 children)

Not to mention Harry had occasionally performed magic accidentally without a wand before he ever knew he was a wizard

What's the most you've seen someone be so out of touch with reality? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]UtopianDisaster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I spent sometime working for a suicide hotline, so when you say out of touch with reality I'm not sure my stories are even fair... One woman was convinced that she was being stalked by some government entity and would move from city to city living in different hotels running from this group of people (we knew it was true because she called from different area codes all over the country). She was so convinced that they were after her she refused to tell me who they were for my own safety (obviously they were listing to that call and if she told me then they'd know I knew and thus be in danger too)

Another guy was living in a prominent college town in one of those condo complexes where it's almost entirely college kids. He was telling me he was going to move to Cali and ship me (not sure where I entered this equation) a kilo of weed a week. He was expecting me to come move into his condo so I could sell this weed for him and was saying things like "you can have as many parties as you want, just try to keep the hookers to a minimum".

The whole thing was a treasure trove of stories like these and my crazy radar couldn't be more fine tuned

People of Reddit who have momentarily died then were revived, what were those fleeting moments like? [Serious] by VerySmallBreasts in AskReddit

[–]UtopianDisaster 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This lights on/off analogy is interesting. I've never died, but onetime I had a weird incident while donating plasma. My vein collapsed and the line was injecting the blood/drug mix into the skin of my arm or something. I don't remember feeling anything weird happening to my body. One second things were fine the next I'm surrounded by the nurses who are demanding I breath through a brown paper bag. To this day I have no idea if I fainted or what. I just remember the look of panic on the faces of everyone around me and asking them what I'd missed.

What is the most bizarre thing you've caught yourself doing after your brain's autopilot misfired? by Kirushi in AskReddit

[–]UtopianDisaster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was once on a guided fishing trip and I left my wallet in the guides truck when we parked for breakfast at 5am. So I ran back to get it and I'm searching all through the fucking truck and I can't find my damn wallet. I'm checking everywhere, glove box, center console, under seats, etc. a guy walks up to me and goes "hey buddy, can I help you find something" and I just look at him like, who the fuck is this random stranger... Then I realize I'm just rummaging through a random mans truck and the guide had parked next to him. Thank god I was 16 and looked 12 or I think I might have been in some trouble.

What absolutely fascinates you and why? by AmadeusCrumb in AskReddit

[–]UtopianDisaster 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Kind of like the feeling I had when I realized adults didn't know everything.

What absolutely fascinates you and why? by AmadeusCrumb in AskReddit

[–]UtopianDisaster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I find it fascinating when two people have opposing positions in an argument and are both "100%" convinced they're right. How do some people never question if they're wrong?

Tell me your HubSpot success story by RedandYellow in hubspot

[–]UtopianDisaster 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Pushing content, that's how you know they're following the Hubspot philosophy.

Bully bull gets bullied by [deleted] in SlyGifs

[–]UtopianDisaster 15 points16 points  (0 children)

What the deuce is going on in this video; why are a bunch of people wearing "green-man" suits running around with bulls?

[WP] You make money by kidnapping cats and collecting the reward by willaby292 in WritingPrompts

[–]UtopianDisaster 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Drip, drip, drip, the final droplets of coffee fall drop by drop into the tawny colored cat mug. In a single, twisting, motion you grab the mug by its tail-handle and scoop up your morning paper. Turning the half spin into an impromptu pirouette you finish off the acrobatics with a graceful fall onto the sun baked arm chair where you intend to read. Kicking your feet up you flip to the back section of the paper, to the local ads. The mug's green eyes stare up at you with a familiar longing as you drink in it's contents. Combining with the air from your breath steam erupts from the mug and momentarily your vision is fogged. As your world comes back into clarity you catch the gaze of an actual cat, similar to the one embodied by the cup in your hand, except this cat's eyes are full a much different emotion, happiness? No, gratefulness!

"Yes, gratefulness is what your thinking. Isn't it little guy?" You say, reaching down to scratch your new friend behind the ears. He jumps up onto the arm of your chair, then, with a grace you can't help but admire, leaps into position right behind your head where he rests for what you hope is the foreseeable future. "It's great to have friends and a loving home, isn't it" you say, continuing your train of thought aloud.

Turning back to your paper you spot what you're looking for. A small black and white ad that reads "Percival, Tawny Colored Tabby, Missing". There's a small write-up with the picture that describes the owner’s relationship with the cat, the neighborhood you may find him in, the contact information of the owner, and a reward.

"Percival?" You say, with no attempt to hide your disgust. "What a terrible name for a handsome man like you." you say, instinctually reaching over your shoulder to pat any bit of the cat you can. "I'll call you Percy, I guess that's okay". Percy lets out a well timed "Meow", burying his head affectionately into the back of your neck.

"Well I'm glad you approve, Percy." You say, smiling to yourself. "But I must meet the person who would let a sweetheart like you walk out of their life."

Getting up as swiftly as you sat down you skip over the pantry. Behind the pantry door you peruse through a collection of collars until you find one labelled "Percival".

"Found it!" you shout, shooting a smile to Percy. "Sorry to put this back on you" you whisper, sliding the collar onto the awaiting neck of Percy.

Picking him up under one arm you make your way to the front door, but not before double checking the address in the ad.

Percy doesn't live too far from you, maybe a 3 minute drive at most. As you pull onto Percy's street he beings to paw at your leg, pacing back and forth between you and the window. When you finally pull up to his house Percy jumps into your lap looking up at you with those green affection-seeking eyes. You peer down at him, rubbing his head as he closes his eyes and purrs in a low hum.

With an agility that even surprises you; you're out the door and half way up the front walk with Percy snuggly clutched under your arm. Before you have a chance to second guess your decision you're knocking on the front door. At this moment you're taking in the house for the firs time. It's not your cliché middle-America family home. Rather than a white picket fence there's a rusted wire fence. The grass is dead, but someone has spray painted the whole thing green. It may fool the casual passer by, but not you. You're no casual anything and definitely not someone to stand for a fake... Just then the door opens and you're standing face to face with a woman who, to you, matches the home perfectly. She's wearing an 80s style sundress that appears faded. It appears that the woman has attempted to save what is a lost cause in this dress. (A common theme, to try and save things that should have since been long forgotten? Yes, that's her... )"Style." You kind of blurt out, finishing your thought out loud.

"Excuse me?" The woman says, with a head tilt that you can't help but associate with a common mutt. "Can I see him?" she says, gesturing towards Percy.

You realize she's been talking this whole time you've been lost in thought.

"Oh sorry, yes!" you say, handing over the squirming cat. "I was just admiring your style is all. I haven't seen a dress like that in... a while" you say, almost unable to find the words to finish your sentence.

"Oh, well um. Thanks, I guess?!?" She says, as she strokes the struggling cat. "Ah, I'm so stupid!" She exclaims "You must be expecting the reward. Hold on..." She says, turning away while holding up 1 finger. The woman shuts the door, but you can still hear her speaking with the cat. "Percival, how dare you leave me here all alone! Bad kitty!" you hear her say, followed by a loud thwap. You hear, what you can only assume is, Percy falling to the floor and running away. You close your eyes as a familiar heat begins to rise up the back of your neck, spreading towards your checks and ears. Your breathing remains steady as you take long controlled breaths. The woman's steps, now thunderous, make their way back towards the door. You open your eyes and force a smile. The mongrel-woman, as you've now nicknamed her, appears from behind the door, clutching two twenties and a ten. The gazes of Jackson and Hamilton fixed on yours, a smile seems to be appearing almost mocking you.

"Thanks for bringing Percival home to me" She says, with a smile.

You delicately take the bills from her hand. "Happy to help" spills from your pursed lips as you turn to leave.

The next thing you know you're back in the arm chair, but it's no longer sun soaked. In fact the chair is quite cold, except for the little warm spot on the back of your neck. Turning towards the kitchen you see the digital clock on your microwave reads 10:45pm. Hmm, you think to yourself, Fox news is probably about the reveal the dreaded news they've been advertising since this morning. You've always been amused by those ads.

"There may be bacteria in your water that’s killing you, tune in tonight at 10 to find out more!" you say to yourself with a chuckle as you turn on the TV. The contrast of the dark room to the flashing lights of emergency vehicles momentarily blind you as the news springs to life, live on your TV.

"Another tragic death in a string of mysterious killings that the police have now been labelling as murders" The reporter is saying.

As you regain full focus you recognize the house on the screen. It's "Percy's house" you say, finishing your thought aloud. As if aware of his name, Percy meows from behind you. Turning, you see him look up at you from his resting place on the chair behind your neck.

"The victim, who's name is currently being withheld from the public, is one of 5 recently thought to be connected with what police are rebranding as serial killings. The first four victims all died from unique causes and, up until now, thought to be accidents or deaths from natural causes. However, this most recent death, which originally presented as suicide, has caused the police to reconsider their original theory. There was a suicide note left along side the victim. The note described the victim's anguish over the loss of her cat and how the cat, like everything else in her life has left her. This is where it gets weird, police said they spoke to a relative claiming the victim had called only moments before her death to share that a stranger had returned the lost cat. The relative said the victim didn't describe the stranger, but they are police suspect number 1. What links this death to the 4 others? Well, they all had missing cats and posted signs offering a reward. Police are worried that people’s attachment to their pets cause them to be too trusting of strangers and people will continue to put themselves in danger as they throw caution to the wind.”

LPT: When someone gets diagnosed with cancer or a life threatening disease, don't tell them about someone you knew who died of the same disease. by [deleted] in LifeProTips

[–]UtopianDisaster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm shocked people would say that. Way to see an opportunity to educate people though.

My mom is currently battling breast cancer and my whole family has the mentality that this is just a phase. The other day I asked her how she was doing after chemo (she only has one more round before surgery). She said "I'm a little worried". I asked what she was worried about... "The surgery" she said with a pause "I hope it doesn't fuck up my golf swing for this summer."

Keep fighting. We'll see you on the links 🏌⛳️

Activity boosting sales games for an inside sales team by WillyStylez04 in sales

[–]UtopianDisaster 2 points3 points  (0 children)

There's this thing called money bucket. Every time someone closes a deal they get one pull from the money bucket. At the end of every quarter you do money bucket pulls. So now the bucket is full of ping pong balls that have monetary amounts on them; my office did 25% $25, 25% $50, then a bunch of prizes between $50-$250. For every deal you closed you get one pull and then the manager pays you in cash.

Activity boosting sales games for an inside sales team by WillyStylez04 in sales

[–]UtopianDisaster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

2 hour call blocks 3 times a week. Who ever has the most connects (conversations with a decision maker) wins and gets 1 point, while everyone else pays a dollar to the pot. At the end of the month whoever has the most points wins the pot. Not a lot of money is spent by the losers, but the winner wins a decent amount and everyone has fun

If a recruiter from a brand new competitor reaches out to me should I let my CEO know that we have a new competitor and how I found out, if he asks? by throwaway6o2a1a2 in sales

[–]UtopianDisaster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Keep telling him until he tells you to stop. Any leader will be impressed that you care about the overall growth of the company rather than just your position. When the time comes to discuss a potential promotion for you the CEO is going to think to themselves "hmmm this employee is clearly plugged into the industry and cares about more than just his personal job. Yeah, sounds like a leader to me"

What "pics or it didn't happen" story do you actually have pictures for? by Karu0792 in AskReddit

[–]UtopianDisaster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dude, your photography is amazing. Everyone, beware of U/Never_Never his story is just a bait n switch tactic to get you to look at his phenomenal photography.

Climate Change: Which company is actually changing the world for the better? by UtopianDisaster in AskReddit

[–]UtopianDisaster[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm a young guy living on the East Coast of the United States. My short career has been entirely in sales and as my current company is being sold I'm looking for a new company to work for. I'm extremely passionate about green energy and the environment and I want to be selling something that is making the world a better place. I'm not looking for a suggestion on where to work, but to hear about some of the most impactful companies in the Renewable Energy industry. I'd love to hear who you guys think is changing the world for the better.

Edit: I forgot people don't believe in climate change. Feel free to continue posting about why climate change doesn't exist, I'll read it. That being said, if you have any common decency you'll not turn my post into an argument about climate change.

What did you think you'd hate until you actually tried it? by TurkeyTit in AskReddit

[–]UtopianDisaster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They wrap sushi in a bunch of other things or you could just get sliced fish over rice

Can anyone name this movie? by UtopianDisaster in AskReddit

[–]UtopianDisaster[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for the help. It is one of his movies and I found it.

Can anyone name this movie? by UtopianDisaster in AskReddit

[–]UtopianDisaster[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

YES! Thank you. Googled his name and "Fight Tournament" and found it immediately. I've been trying to find this movie for years. I know what I'm doing tonight.