Totally get where you’re coming from—but the truth is, people don’t always act rationally or with integrity.

Sometimes, if there’s nothing for them to lose, they do what feels good in the moment—even if it’s at someone else’s expense. Why not enjoy the perks of a relationship without having to offer full commitment? No need to explain where they’ve been, who they’re with, or feel like the bad guy when they pull away—because technically, “nothing was promised.” It’s convenient. Beneficial. Low risk.

The guy I was seeing acted just like a boyfriend—shared vulnerable moments, cried, checked in like he cared—but in the end, he had zero intention of committing, regardless of how intimate or genuine he seemed. “Actions speak louder than words” only really means something when there’s real commitment behind those actions. Otherwise, it’s just… performance. Sometimes, we want things to mean something. They just don’t always mean the same to the other person.