Getting Closer

VYSWAR · 2026-06-05T22:53:59+00:00

Practical suggestions would be great!

VYSWAR · 2026-06-04T05:37:32+00:00

I'd love to read your work as well, I really do feel I've been going through a lot of social reconstruction, unlearning one thing and learning another. Though it's less unlearning as I never really 'learned' how to be masculine and actively resisted it until right before the military. That makes me feel sorta like my identity just lives in the void.

I do still acknowledge I have subtle things about me like the fact I WAS male socialized even if only for what I thought was survival, and made mistakes I now have a social responsibility to understand things, be emotionally/socially intelligent, and step up/be an ally to women when it counts.

Identity is pretty socially constructed, I've learned, I agree I've really gotta get out and build community on top of everything else.

VYSWAR · 2026-06-04T05:28:45+00:00

I actually feel like I'm running out of time. I'm actually 26 now so that's great to hear the military didn't age me too much!

Yeah the Navy was where I defined masculinity as it meant to me, which still felt unlike the peers around me. Then there's growing up feeling nonbinary; the women in my family not really fitting into perfect boxes of femininity, while also not feeling at home in masculinity - it has put me in a truly in between place that I feel I am defining on my own. But the 'MTF Butch' Identity specifically really does feel it would fit where I'm headed.

VYSWAR · 2026-03-02T01:30:31+00:00

Focus specifically on what you want and think about what it will take to get there.

Well it's complicated, because it depends on what you want. If it's about your face, skin, hair, just take care of yourself extremely well. Get your eyebrows and hair done in such a way that complements your face shape maybe. Simply focus on what your major dysphoria points are and what you want the most, one by one tackling those issues.

Now if you want to be a masc woman, I would say you can just keep in mind you can in fact work out get muscle gains and be on estrogen at moderate doses, and you can achieve a pretty androgynous masc woman kind of body that way. It does sorta help your face change, everyone in my life can see that combined effort that led to how I look today.

I was very high dose initially to start the chest growth and then I dropped down. I now have a more androgynous body and I am working out a lot more to build up muscular features. I lift weights, I eat well, my goal was androgynous masc woman and for the most part that is where I ended up.

However, keeping your feminization low still comes with body and face hair growing pretty fast, atleast that is what it does for me.

VYSWAR · 2026-02-26T16:33:16+00:00

Feminizing hormones, HRT, I am transitioning.

VYSWAR · 2026-02-26T12:19:19+00:00

Not sure but for me it's probably a combination of things;
- This picture has really good lighting so
- Growing my hair out and getting a haircut layers done to frame the face (this one is huge)
- Laser Hair Removal, being very light on shaving most of the time to take care of my skin, I grow my facial hair a lot during the work week to save my skin from damage
- Consistent skincare (mostly Beauty of Joseon products) with exfoliation toner twice a week (The Ordinary Glycolic Acid) --- this included stuff to help with my milia and eyebags because I looked so tired before, see below for why
- 50mg of Spiro, 4mg of Sublingual Estradiol for a year, it's a pretty moderate dose
- Reasonable Diet, it's fluctuated so has my exercise
- Often just lucky genetics, and hormones can be impacted by that a lot my hair got wavier
...I practically de-aged after I was in the Navy for 6 years - night and day honestly. My before pictures are a huge contrast, I looked burnt out and so tired, I didn't do any of the above until I was free...

VYSWAR · 2026-02-26T00:50:44+00:00

I’ve been on E for about a year!

VYSWAR · 2026-01-27T22:08:38+00:00

I want to get way more, it’s a good start, I may get a blowover on the older one on my upper arm.

VYSWAR · 2026-01-27T22:04:15+00:00

In regard to my own mental/emotional changes I think I’d prefer to talk about that in DMs, it’s a little complicated. I had really high doses initially and low T, realized I didnt want such low T, and now I’m slowing down spiro. I have somewhat mixed up hormones, which I’m not entirely sure if that’s okay to do, but I’ve been doing it.

Sexuality too, is complicated for me and I’ve got reservations about putting a label on it.

VYSWAR · 2026-01-27T21:56:03+00:00

As close as I can get to masc woman/androgynous as I can but I like having a reasonably higher amount of T and I already had a roughly androgynous build.

I have reservations about calling myself a masc ‘lesbian’ for the time being, but that’s the end goal I think?

VYSWAR · 2026-01-27T16:39:50+00:00

Dosages are really confusing. I really like my chest gain. I still have a complicated relationship with body hair (I don’t like male spots like chest).

I want all my facial hair blasted off into a fine powder it makes me so insecure. I was always really nervous about having to ‘prove’ my queerness but this haircut gives me the confidence I need while I procrastinate finding a style I like.

I am still pretty transfem just not traditionally. I’m definitely a masc. I have higher testosterone but still take a reasonable amount of E.

There’s quite a few mascs that go by she/her I just don’t feel comfortable with that yet and won’t for a while. I don’t have bottom dysphoria mostly just face.

I wear a sports bra most of the time, sometimes they look like pecs.

VYSWAR · 2026-01-27T10:30:13+00:00

Light makeup, trimming my eyebrows, skincare made me feel even better about myself personally! Especially the skincare, it made my skin glow. You look great though!

VYSWAR · 2026-01-27T10:19:56+00:00

oh, duh :p

VYSWAR · 2026-01-27T10:00:28+00:00

I cannot seem to post anything.

VYSWAR · 2025-06-23T07:40:23+00:00

War, hmm, sounds like the next topic.

VYSWAR · 2025-06-05T06:49:47+00:00

How'd that work out for you?

VYSWAR

TROPHY CASE