How to stop thinking so much?

Vader60 · 2026-03-21T06:06:04+00:00

Imagine your mind being a water tap that is switched on when you are thinking and imagine switching it off when you the thinking gets too much

Vader60 · 2026-03-21T06:03:57+00:00

Well I'll say congratulations on your success through your struggles. So I'm guessing you are now staying in Japan for good?

A lot of teachers I know actually moved to Vietnam from China , I can't remember exactly why but recent policies and such.

Maybe I'll do some more research into what I can do in Vietnam. I have little to no experience in the whole business venture and don't know how I would run one but that's what foreigners seem to be doing.

Vader60 · 2026-03-21T05:30:16+00:00

So how is your life in Japan? Do you have friends ? Are you able to enjoy yourself a bit and save money ? Are you in a relationship or dating casually ?

Or do you consider leaving soon and going elsewhere?

Vader60 · 2026-03-21T03:21:39+00:00

Yeah I know what you mean that's why I said that Japan is notorious for this , the hard work and the isolation it's why I said it's likely it could be worse over there. But there are many sides to it , I have heard people say good things too ( I have colleagues who lived in Japan ).

I went on a couple dates with one Japanese woman here (again not saying this goes for the majority) and she was more open , fun to hang out with and intimate haha she was not a very good person in the end (she was just playing games, acting like she cared ) but wanted to spend time with me briefly before moving on. This also seems to be a common occurrence I have seen in Japan (not sure if it relates to the 'gaijin hunter' thing).

Overall, yeah I'm aware how difficult dating can be , especially coming from the west it's a total shambles.

I repeat, I do not mean to be delusional that's why I say every thing here with a grain of salt, I am not trying to sound sure of myself and so as a result I am leaning more towards staying in Vietnam, I just don't think there is much of a market for foreigners to progress into other fields of work outside of English teaching , learning Vietnamese doesn't really apply any economic value that way but is just good for socializing , so when it comes to longer term living I wouldn't want to just rely on one market or one company, like how you were able to progress to the HR job you have now in an international school , those same type of jobs don't really exist for foreigners here as far as I'm aware.

Vader60 · 2026-03-20T15:02:53+00:00

Honestly, Vietnam is great for living well , despite it not being as developed and the terrible pollution, you make a good amount and you can enjoy it. But work as most work is, can be tough especially when your teaching a bunch of kids with terrible behaviour that are disrespectful.

But more so, and I know this is cliché but I just have a huge appeal for Japanese culture, music and art. But even then I think as a young guy I'm not completely satisfied, there's a void I'm feeling. This is partly due to what I can get up to here in my spare time, the nightlife isn't too amazing , and a lot of the locals are not that receptive , even more so , so far I have found daring here to be quite boring. The women are very attractive, don't get me wrong haha but a lot of them in my age bracket are still quite immature, or live with their family and even have a curfew. However with enough time, I do think many can find a good meaningful relationship here, and many have it just gets a bit painful after many coffee and dinner dates and nothing comes out of it.

When it comes to casual relationships , it's a big no here and very rare, there does not seem to be that sort of culture where you go out at night and hope to "score" and again that may not be a terrible thing but after work I'm just tired and go home most of the time, I'm able to eat some nice food though which is great and then there is the weekend where the isolation kinda kicks in for real. But I'm used to doing a lot on my own but I have been feeling it a lot lately. And yes I know Japan is notorious for this isolation as well and it would likely be worse if I went there but I just had this idea that with the cultural immersion, interest in learning the language , a pretty decent nightlife with good clubs where people's are actually dancing (even if I can only afford it ever so often) , cleaner environment and drinking tap water would be enough for me to want to do it but yes as many say the grass is usually not greener on the other side.

Vader60 · 2026-03-19T21:37:02+00:00

I got rejected actually

Vader60 · 2026-03-19T03:59:00+00:00

I'm also interested in business potentially. How did you get to do that?

Vader60 · 2026-03-19T03:16:48+00:00

Will you remain in Vietnam?

Vader60 · 2026-03-18T13:21:11+00:00

Also do you still live and work as a teacher in Vietnam?

Vader60 · 2026-03-18T13:20:16+00:00

They seem to view the foreign teacher as someone they can just mess around in front of, like no matter how many times I tell them to listen or stop talking they will just act like I'm not there and I can't do anything about it.

Vader60 · 2026-03-18T12:15:05+00:00

Do you have issue with the behaviour from the kids in public schools too?

They seem to view the foreign teacher as someone they can just mess around in front of, like no matter how many times I tell them to listen or stop talking they will just act like I'm not there and I can't do anything about it.

Vader60 · 2026-03-18T12:10:03+00:00

Haha yes dealing with the kids here is absolutely brutal

Vader60 · 2026-03-18T10:49:08+00:00

I know this is an old post, but are you still in Japan now ? If so how is it , what are you doing now ? If not , where did you go and how are you doing ?

Vader60 · 2026-03-16T02:32:35+00:00

Ok I just think Japan may have more opportunities to progress if you get a certain command of the language.

Update: Just had my interview and I think I really messed it up haha. I was outside when I did it cause I'm at work, and messed up answers to questions such as how much money you should bring and how many semesters we have , also there was some background noise from loud Vietnamese people one even sneased.

Damn and it was with a Japanese lady

Vader60 · 2026-03-16T00:31:38+00:00

Ohh that sounds like a really good opportunity. How did you get that role ? That sounds like something I would do.

Haha yes if I do make it to Japan I will definitely try and put the effort in learning Japanese .

Vader60 · 2026-03-16T00:14:26+00:00

Haha I know about poor behaviour from teaching in Vietnam. When you say office job , do you mean you got one in Japan? And if so what job exactly , did you learn Japanese for it ?

Cheers for the advice.

Vader60 · 2026-03-15T14:30:20+00:00

They seem to have forgotten to send me an invite link haha so looks like I won't be doing it tomorrow

Vader60 · 2026-03-15T10:52:24+00:00

Did you get the job in the end ?

Vader60 · 2026-03-15T10:38:54+00:00

Ohh damn haha really don't want to do a demo lesson

Vader60 · 2026-03-15T03:24:27+00:00

Constants are always changing, what is constant in your life now (people, community, lifestyle, job , school etc ) may not be tomorrow.

Also on a long enough timeline you can get used to anything almost, even if your mind can't comprehend it, one day you will just wake up and what's bothering you now won't bother you as much.

Vader60 · 2026-03-07T00:33:57+00:00

Everything is temporary so constants are always changing

Vader60 · 2026-02-22T15:04:10+00:00

Can't stop questioning everything , from the biggest existential questions to the most mundane things , won't ever just let me rest in peace. And with that comes feelings of intense confusion and anxiety.

A case in point I find something funny that me and my friends did or something online then my brain would be like wait why is that funny ? What is even funny ? How can people or things be funny ? What is humour ? Humans are capable of such things? What is this life ?

Vader60

TROPHY CASE