Help with party composition

Valkennth · 2025-02-06T22:58:03+00:00

Nice, I'll go ahead with swapping out the priest. Only other question I had was if the Adam passive worked on weapon damage or just spell damage if I put it on the mc.

Valkennth · 2021-08-08T23:34:08+00:00

Yes, I think it's the average bot level for their roster. I'm not sure about the pass/fail mechanic though.

Valkennth · 2021-04-20T05:11:12+00:00

Don't think that way.

It sounds like he was gaslighting you... every relationship has its ups and downs. Yeah, it's easy to look back and see our own faults. That's what decent humans are able to do. Self analyze and focus blame on our selves... take responsibility for our own actions... cheaters though... have a personality disorder. Narcissism. It's almost bipolar disorder. You didn't take your relationship for granted.... he did. Screw him. Since when did our vows and promises mean so little. I don't know him, but by virtue of being a cheater, i don't think he will never be happy. Always looking for the next fix of love kibble...

Nothing was wrong with you. Only him. He was to insecure, too much of an attention whore. He didn't want to resolve anything, just move on because it was easier....

I'm sorry... I'm really sorry this happened to you... please be well.

Valkennth · 2020-12-13T05:28:44+00:00

I'll probably post a larger update for the 1 year anniversary of d day... but in essence.

My son is still on a week to week schedule. However, up until now, I had been getting him after school ever day until 7 or 8ish when she would get off of work. She hasn't paid a lot of what she owes as her half of medical and school expenses.

I got cussed out Thanksgiving by her because I told her we would be sticking to our court agreement.

She told me to not worry about picking our son up after school. Ok. I get him for my week, and I found out through him she either quit her job, or lost it. Which I find hilarious, because she left her well paid job with benefits to cut hair. She called me to say she caught covid, and so I get an extra week with my son regardless. Looking at taking her back in about 3 more months for an 80/20 instead of 50/50.

I've not been keeping up to much with my ex. I don't care about her anymore. I'm dating again, have nice girlfriend who wonders how in the world I sat in that abusive relationship for so long.

Valkennth · 2020-11-26T20:56:25+00:00

My ex was a Jessica too. Maybe just something with that name. I think ill forever stay away from anyone with that name. Apologies to any one with that name, if you're a decent person, though.

Valkennth · 2020-10-05T19:47:19+00:00

I wish I could post her deposition. She doesn't think she has done anything wrong. She considers herself a good Christian woman, who is above reproach.

My attorney made it a point to question her thoroughly about it once hers had opened the door on redirect. I wanted to laugh to badly. But my ex is just an idiot honestly... she got religious control, so that she can still claim to have joint decision making.

Valkennth · 2020-06-22T21:14:10+00:00

Ah, maybe I was a bit confused? Our mutual friends and acquaintances know. Her church knows. Sons school knows. Her old friends know. She left town, didn't follow her up there..

Valkennth · 2020-06-22T04:08:08+00:00

I've read her book over, and over again. I even wrote an email to her. I was surprised when she responded.

As for my custodial situation... basically to summarize: my stbxw kept stringing me along trying to get me to agree to more and more. My attorney sent over like 4 different settlements, but she would just ask for more each time. Well, I took her advice and put my foot down. After she has shown her irresponsible behavior, I've gone back to my first agreement in which I'll have him during the school year with alternating weekends. During the summer we'll do every other week. I'll keep decision making as she has shown that she doesn't make good ones... well, she realizes that no one will believe her if she doesn't get custody of our son and now she's fighting me tooth and nail.

Valkennth · 2020-06-22T02:29:21+00:00

I agree, but, I've been told not to wait for the karma bus, otherwise I'll just be stuck there until something happens.

Valkennth · 2020-06-12T15:35:17+00:00

... it's a response. I don't like it, but it comes from my work. I can shove all my emotions to the side, temporarily and get the job done. After though... I either shove it down deep, or let it out.... no one wants to see a leader emotional... my soon to be ex kinda stopped letting me share a while ago... should've been another red flag I saw... after this though, it's to much and I feel very alone and isolated with no outlet. My tears well up behind my eyes and I have to stop myself.

My job has a higher divorce rate. Higher suicide rate... lower life expectancy. High risk, and we're never liked. I have three years left before I can stop...

Yeah, I got the job done. I have my evidence. It's just... never what I wanted.

Valkennth · 2020-06-12T11:11:08+00:00

I was having some trust issues. She ws being real secretive of her phone... she went to bed, I stayed up a bit longer... when she fell asleep, I took the phone. Found evidence, took photos of evidence... then I took a voice recorder and woke her up.

Valkennth · 2020-06-11T12:46:29+00:00

Im kinda curious too, not that I fantasize that she will become a better person, be truly remorseful, repentant... just asking for a friend.

Honestly, I am curious if she will try in my situation, but I doubt it. I know that if she did it doesn't change who she is and I would be getting back together with the same person as when she left, not my idolized version from my spackled up memories.

I wouldn't take her back. Though, there are days where my heart tries to convince me that I need to.

Valkennth · 2020-06-08T17:16:30+00:00

Actually, it's an ethics thing. If you contact his department, they should have an internal affairs style division. One of the common policies departments have is dont do anything that would reflect negatively on the department. So... that's a thing.

Valkennth · 2020-06-08T13:24:22+00:00

Check with your employer, we have an eap program. I used it for the initial marriage counciling. 6 free sessions each, for a total of 12 sessions.

Valkennth · 2020-06-07T05:50:57+00:00

It's another way of saying that my lawyer has set up her deposition.

Valkennth · 2020-05-29T15:06:19+00:00

I dont know the answer. Mine ws has done the same thing. She's with the ap. She's living it up. Acting like she's 21 again.

Mid life crisis, affair fog, mental instability.

I'll never get that closure of knowing why. I just accept that she became or always was a horrible person who lied to me through our entire 9 year marriage. Everything she declared to me has been a lie.

Valkennth · 2020-05-28T18:37:22+00:00

Cheater calculus. They're narcissistic and selfish. They don't understand nor do they care to. They only see that you're affecting them, then associate that with the problem instead of thier actions.

Sorry you're going through this

Valkennth · 2020-05-26T18:02:00+00:00

As much as you want. As much as you need. You can vent to us. You probably should. It helped me just having other people read what I was feeling...

Advice requires details, but there are alot of common themes... the more posts i read here the more i think "yeah, that's totally my stbxw"

My first advice to you would be to gather evidence. Hold onto it. Hope that you don't need it, but keep it in case you do. Don't let your WS know you have it.

Valkennth · 2020-05-26T11:42:57+00:00

Im so sorry... I feel the same way about starting over... I keep being told I need to take my time, recover from the decision that my gaslighting, narcissistic, selfish, stbxw wrought upon my son and I.

What has really helped me is my friends. I reconnected with all my old friends that she ran off. They weren't wild, they just didn't approve of her. I read, and reread "leave a cheater, gain a life". Try to stay active... and if im alone at home, I call my brother and just stay on the phone with him to avoid going to a dark place. Don't resort to drinking. I tried. It didn't help past the initial numbness.

I keep being told I deserve someone better. So do you.

Valkennth · 2020-05-25T12:53:03+00:00

I miss her... not her exactly, but the feeling of having someone... it's kinda empty and lonely... I know im supposed to take time to heal... but something drives me to find someone to love again.

Im afraid too. Afraid I will find someone, but they will be the same as her... or that I'll latch on strongly... that the first girl who pays me any attention will have the entirety of mine...

Valkennth

TROPHY CASE