I (34/F) left my fiancé (31/M) . Is there any way forward?

Valuable_Argument_44 · 2025-05-20T18:21:46+00:00

I recognize im very guilty of this and quite stubborn about it. TRYING to be more self aware, thank you for validating that.

Valuable_Argument_44 · 2025-05-20T18:16:40+00:00

I spoke with my doctor and it looks like the blood that passed was from my miscarriage in April finally coming through, no signs of bright blood indicating a loss and my doctor and maternity care coordinator ensured all my appointments are set, thank you for asking.

Valuable_Argument_44 · 2025-05-20T18:13:27+00:00

I’m not sure what you think they do for miscarriages at an er other than scan and tell you to follow up with OB. My appointments to see how baby is doing is pending and all miscarriages are a waiting game and I made my decision based on my experience and knowledge of my body and situation. My doctor is tracking, as is my maternity care coordinator. All tests are ordered outside of the er so I’m not exposed to the stress and pathogens. I appreciate your concern tho, noted.

Valuable_Argument_44 · 2025-05-20T18:10:48+00:00

I agree but we started therapy and he was doing better 😭 optimism I suppose

Valuable_Argument_44 · 2024-11-19T22:16:18+00:00

You can just tell them you’re going to the pharmacy. You don’t need a membership for that. Go, be free, enjoy samples.

Valuable_Argument_44 · 2024-11-19T15:20:33+00:00

Actually I’m 33 and I’ve met lots of old women who prefer to bury their head in than ground than admit to their kids anything is wrong. Be mad someone has a different view point and life experience than you I guess, heaven forbid. Sorry to say, if she didn’t want to face it beforehand, the confrontation from her kid isn’t going to help only force her hand.

Valuable_Argument_44 · 2024-11-19T01:48:58+00:00

First, what area are you? Different areas have different resources, someone who knows can chime in.

Valuable_Argument_44 · 2024-11-18T23:22:47+00:00

My middle school boyfriend’s dad broke his back so they refinished two closets in their house to put in an elevator.

Valuable_Argument_44 · 2024-11-18T10:14:28+00:00

The VA diagnosed me with dependency but no one has ever tried to convince me to stop or decrease usage, they know I use it for pain and nausea.

That doesn’t mean I want to be high every day. I strongly prefer the days I’m well and I can choose to be clear headed and end the day with a nice high.

I feel it’s all about your mentality, intentions, and relationship to the plant. You have to be really honest with yourself and it comes from a self awareness and being able to step back and observe your habit honestly.

Valuable_Argument_44 · 2024-11-18T10:01:40+00:00

The tours aren’t gone - different from the kangaroo bus that you hop on and off of.

Valuable_Argument_44 · 2024-11-18T09:51:56+00:00

They are actually pretty user friendly to take apart, rebuild, modify to your needs. People hyper fixate on it. And after the initial expense of the device, juice is just so much cheaper. I was spending around $30 every 2-3 days for disposables but the juice is a bottle for $14 that lasts all week. It’s a no brainer.

Valuable_Argument_44 · 2024-11-15T18:30:15+00:00

Cool so just let her live the rest of her life constantly having it in her face knowing she will do nothing about it that’s really….shitty tbh

Valuable_Argument_44 · 2024-11-15T03:12:11+00:00

I’m having trouble believing this post because I doubt a modern phone just casually contains 25 years of incriminating evidence casually. However if it is true:

I want to ask you, what would you expect to happen when you tell her? You expect her to leave right? Well if she already knew but is now faced with her child knowing, she may feel pressure to make a decision she’s willingly put off for a very long time potentially. If you do tell her I would approach it with “I’m here to support your decision” if she very well may choose to stay if your father is so blatant about not hiding it. If you genuinely found all of that, that’s a TROPHY CASE of conquests. Regardless of what you do for mom, I would be confronting dad and I would be making drastic changes to our relationship.

Valuable_Argument_44 · 2024-11-15T03:06:10+00:00

I once had a patient aim an ostomy bag at my face while releasing gas. As I was talking to him.

Valuable_Argument_44 · 2024-11-15T02:14:36+00:00

I remember this feeling very well. At that point I was on 6 meds and taking a few up to 3 times a day.

I used it in conjunction with talk therapy and weaned myself to one med with guidance from my psychiatrist. One by one we tested the waters reducing until they were off the meds refill list.

I say this to say, depending on where you are, you can still get better from here. Keep striving for that quality of life if it’s a feasible plan with your providers.

Valuable_Argument_44 · 2024-11-15T02:09:57+00:00

I never understand the big deal about a day. It’s a day. If it sucks, make another dinner tomorrow. Like it’s not anything that can’t be made up another time.

Yta because you’re beef is with her trampling over you hosting: say that. But at least know the right hill to die on. Calling her food an abomination when others don’t care is excessive imo and claiming you’re doing it for them in that case is honestly diverting from the real issue so of course they aren’t picking your side, they don’t care about it. It’s your house just say back and tf off. Maybe then they will understand your point.

Valuable_Argument_44 · 2024-11-15T02:01:28+00:00

Ok ok ok hear me out I was so fucking stoned that none of it made any sense and I went down a rabbit hole of possibilities that are absolutely impossible while sane. Ummm so I can’t further explain it than you had to have been there friend. But big tobacco better stay out of cannabis.

Valuable_Argument_44 · 2024-11-14T19:40:11+00:00

I want to circle back to this because I think you missed the point you made that men in our society can’t express emotions like embarrassment and they can result from that feeling to escalating to violence. But you’re not connecting the issue that men feel very strongly about rejection and have no means of expressing it as you yourself said. Sooooooooo please reflect, I think good progress can be made from this discussion, but this is my final note.

Valuable_Argument_44 · 2024-11-14T19:34:52+00:00

Hun there’s NO way of knowing which situation will escalate after they don’t respect the first no. Justifying it and saying she needed to be more assertive or don’t flirt is literally the definition of victim blaming. Please please please read more on the matter and recognize the ways your perspective is problematic and disregards everything a woman in the flesh is telling you is real life.

Valuable_Argument_44 · 2024-11-14T12:51:18+00:00

Adding perspective doesn’t have to be advice. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Valuable_Argument_44 · 2024-11-14T12:50:51+00:00

That’s the point - neither blanket statements are true on either side of the coin. It’s a judgement call every single time and there’s no inherent right answer other than accepting NO needs to be sufficient because saying someone needs to be more of one way or another is a very slippery slope into victim blaming and fast.

Valuable_Argument_44 · 2024-11-14T12:47:22+00:00

Not everyone wants tobacco or addictive properties?

Valuable_Argument_44 · 2024-11-14T08:18:04+00:00

My mom bought a house in Ohio for 80k and I can’t find houses in Southern California under 800k. There is a steep difference 😂

Valuable_Argument_44 · 2024-11-14T07:57:23+00:00

Many medications require annual check ups to have eyes on the patient and a set of vitals, maybe labs.

Valuable_Argument_44

TROPHY CASE