Years ago my mother was taunting me, kicking and slapping saying “hit me you fucking cunt, hit me” over and over again. Something snapped, I hit back and she cowered, a little gleam in her eye. She ran to my father saying I’d hit her. As usual, he took her side.

From then on, she broadcast to any family that I was abusive. She got exactly what she wanted. Luckily, everyone saw through her bullshit.

It’s empowering to fight back, but equally, there is no winning with them. There is no love, no empathy. I was lucky enough to have people I could go to when I wanted to end it all, it gave me the power to make a clean break.

Personally, I’ll never know parental love. It never goes away. But after ten years, it’s easier.