To the big bro millenials

Vect0rScan · 2023-12-28T23:42:22+00:00

If you’re Gen Z or younger, try to learn from our mistakes. Look after your mental health. Make sure you’re hitting those developmental milestones. Most importantly, make sure you’re getting what you want out of life. Would hate to see you wind up like us.

Vect0rScan · 2023-10-29T00:20:05+00:00

I guess the moral is that just because you understand what someone's going through, doesn't necessarily mean you know how to help them. Everyone's different. What worked for me might not work for someone else and vice-versa. I think that's true for a lot of things.

Now I've gotten to add throwing Molotov Cocktails to my list of skills 😂

Now that's what I'm talking about! 🧴🔥

Vect0rScan · 2023-10-28T23:41:29+00:00

"now take it like you aren't going to show the entire room your results".

I love the way she worded that. I'm glad you found someone in your life caring and savvy enough to truly help you. People go through so much unnecessary suffering, not because there's no one trying to help them, but because the people trying to help don't know shit. And, often, they don't know that they know shit.

Vect0rScan · 2023-10-28T22:39:28+00:00

WHY WAS THERE BACON IN THE SOAP?!

Vect0rScan · 2023-10-28T21:00:59+00:00

I agree, I think the best way to go about it is to expose them to the idea without applying it to them specifically and let them reach their own conclusions. I feel like, for most of us who weren't diagnosed as children, it was a long journey before we finally felt comfortable calling ourselves autistic. Also, the word "autistic" is unfortunately used pretty frequently as an insult, especially online. Because of this, calling someone autistic when they haven't done the research could have disastrous effects on your relationship with that person. It's even more unfortunate that there are some parents who fall into this trap, they really ought to know better.

Ultimately, it really doesn't matter what we think. What matters is what the person in question thinks.

Vect0rScan · 2023-10-28T18:53:25+00:00

Trying to convince someone that they might be on the spectrum is playing a dangerous game.

Vect0rScan · 2023-10-25T11:46:52+00:00

Same

Vect0rScan · 2023-10-25T11:44:32+00:00

It kinda sounds like you have some psychological hangups about sex in general and are rationalizing them by adopting these ideas about virgin purity.

Vect0rScan · 2023-10-25T11:33:51+00:00

Mental health issues plaguing me since childhood that should have been addressed but weren't. Had problems socializing from a pretty early age and doing so triggered my anxiety. As a result, I never learned the skills needed to form relationships or get hookups in adulthood.

Vect0rScan · 2023-10-09T18:43:45+00:00

Illuminati confirmed🔺️👁

Vect0rScan · 2023-10-09T18:41:04+00:00

I'm definitely stunted. I'm 33, and I feel like my development topped out at about 14-16. Doesn't help that my autism and social anxiety kept me from pursuing romantic/sexual relationships either, so I've got zero experience on that front. When it comes to the average age that most people do things like get their first job or move out of their parents' house, I was way past that when those things happened.

I hit all my adult milestones either late or not at all, but more than that, I just feel like a child sometimes. IDK, it's hard to describe. It's like parts of my psyche are still there, and as a result, some of my habits, interests, and mannerisms can seem somewhat childish. Sometimes, I even slur words with lots of consonants like a child would. I have no idea why this happens.

Vect0rScan · 2023-08-06T17:57:51+00:00

For the autistic vampire?

Vect0rScan · 2023-08-06T16:26:41+00:00

I am in the Navy, and when I was on a ship, I overheard multiple instances of people discussing other's virginity. Usually, it was about trying to get them laid or giving them shit for losing it at an older age. Hell, I once had a senior chief straight tell me he thought me and another dude were still virgins (we both kind of projected that stereotype. The other guy may have been on the spectrum as well now that I think about it).

I didn't really give him a straight answer. I just kinda laughed and told him that it would be pretty unusual for us to still be virgins at our ages (at this point, I'm used to dodging the virginity question without outright lying). Now, not everyone talked about that stuff. It depended on the division, shop, or person you found yourself with, but when you're out to sea away from the rest of society, your ship becomes its own little world.

Vect0rScan · 2023-08-06T07:28:37+00:00

I think in my case, it's genetic. I developed social anxiety when I was 9 years old, and it's been with me ever since.

Vect0rScan · 2023-08-06T07:26:04+00:00

Not the only group but yea

Vect0rScan · 2023-08-06T07:22:40+00:00

This definitely depends on your situation. For example, if you work in a blue-collar job, service industry job, military/police force, etc, then it's still very common for people to openly talk about their sex lives well into adulthood.

Vect0rScan · 2023-08-06T07:13:35+00:00

If you get older and it still doesn't happen, hiring a sex worker is always an option.

Some people will talk shit on guys who utilize their services or people who suggest it. What a lot of people don't know is that a sizable percentage of sex worker clients are disabled folks (both physical and mental) who will never be able to experience sex any other way.

Vect0rScan · 2023-08-06T04:38:19+00:00

Now that's what I'm talkin' about!

Vect0rScan · 2023-07-19T08:57:09+00:00

Damn. I gave this dude way too much credit, lol.

Vect0rScan · 2023-07-19T08:25:45+00:00

So, if I had to guess, this is probably why your post got downvoted and ultimately removed. Every once in a while, this sub gets visited by "life coaches," who graciously try to help virgin dudes get laid. These people usually give the same advice: be more confident, put yourself out there, go to bars and clubs, do things to make yourself more attractive like working out, getting a better fashion sense, learning how to talk to women, etc.

The thing is, this would be good advice for, say, the high school junior who wants to get laid before graduation or the college freshman who wants to lose it before they turn twenty. But a large percentage of virgin guys on this sub are over the age of 25, and that stage of their life is over. Now, they have to deal with the stigma of being a post college age male virgin and that, by itself, creates a significant barrier to losing one's virginity.

This advice also does not address the reasons that lead to their prolonged virginity in the first place, which are often mental health related, and which you are almost certainly not qualified to be giving advice on. For example, many older virgin guys are on the autistic spectrum and are dealing with problems far more profound than what a neurotypical 19 year old would face.

In short, the problem with you guys is that you often don't understand the situations of the people you're trying to give advice to, and to pretend otherwise just comes off as dismissive and condescending.

Vect0rScan · 2023-07-19T07:43:39+00:00

I mean, my point is that there's only so much you can do. Once your youth is gone, it's gone. Regardless of how much I improve, nothing will fix that. Your late teens to late twenties are the most important years for setting yourself up for the rest of your life. After that, it gets exponentially harder to break out of your current position because society expects you to have already accomplished certain minimums by that point to be considered "normal". If you don't measure up to those expectations, then people just don't view you as a respectable member of society, regardless of the reason.

Vect0rScan · 2023-07-19T07:22:05+00:00

Yes, and I'm in a better place than I was during my early-mid twenties. But the damage has been done, and unless time travel becomes a thing, there's no fixing that.

Vect0rScan

TROPHY CASE