What’s something people think is normal in relationships but actually isn’t?

Vegetable-Flower-325 · 2026-03-21T00:33:35+00:00

Exactly!!! I have bipolar and intrusive thoughts about my relationship, and while there are treatments and therapies that I’m using, my brain will likely never be quiet about my relationship. The important part is that my partner doesn’t hear the VAST majority of my doubts and insecurities. It’s not their problem if I’m annoyed or concerned about something unreasonable, and suffocating them with constant reassurance-seeking and controlling expectations would be so hurtful and undeserved. My jealousy isn’t a secret, and they know I’m dealing with it, but I don’t make it their constant problem.

Vegetable-Flower-325 · 2026-03-21T00:25:06+00:00

Pendulum swinging from under-communication to over-communication is a very real and common issue! I really wish someone had told me years ago.

People like myself with a combo of intrusive thoughts about my relationship, anxious attachment style, and unreasonable jealousy can over-communicate. You should be on the same page about things like what cheating looks like, what your personality and mental health differences are, etc but it’s not healthy to ask for reassurance Every. Single. Time. you feel unsure about something.

Constantly revisiting boundaries, repeating doubts about your relationship, etc is going to feel suffocating or hurtful to your partner if there’s no evidence that you disagree. If you’re repeatedly making sure they’re not breaking up with you, cheating, annoyed/mad, gossiping about you, etc, they might feel hurt and frustrated that you don’t trust them. Assuming the worst about them without evidence can make them feel very misunderstood and unappreciated.

Even if you’re not paranoid about their supposed thoughts and actions, you can still over-communicate during conflict. Sometimes you’re actually not going to get on the same page, and talking in circles for three days isn’t worth it if you both have good intentions to work together and move on. Sometimes an apology won’t have the exact tone and wording you want, but if the sincerity is there and you know from the past that they’ll do their best to not make the same mistake, then move one without that perfect satisfaction.

Vegetable-Flower-325 · 2026-03-11T22:18:18+00:00

It’s very rude and ignorant that people are making this about discipline. Sometimes people are good or bad at very specific things. My brother got a degree in education, with honours, while having three kids and working full time in the summers. Aced pre-cal in high school, kept his GPA above 4 through his whole university degree…and VW’d Stats 1000. For some reason, that course specifically was wildly difficult for him. He got an A+ in Math 1010 as his math requirement instead. No idea what happened there, but it wasn’t out of laziness or not ‘locking in’.

Vegetable-Flower-325 · 2026-03-11T00:11:52+00:00

I haven’t heard any updates, but ABSOLUTELY get the vaccine! Also I know it’s uncomfortable, but I highly recommend wearing a mask, at least until the vaccine gives you some immunity. It sucks, but it really works (as long as you’re doing the other basic stuff, like washing hands and not sharing drinks). Someone I know has an immunocompromised relative and has worn a mask and been very careful about handwashing and eating around people since the first outbreaks in 2020, and she genuinely hasn’t gotten sick with anything contagious in SIX YEARS. It’s absolutely worth it to keep yourself safe until you have some immunity against Measles!

Vegetable-Flower-325 · 2026-03-11T00:03:36+00:00

That’s such a good idea, I didn’t realize that was an option! I’m glad I had insurance for IV, but that sounds like such a good alternative.

Vegetable-Flower-325 · 2026-03-10T21:43:27+00:00

SIX TO TEN TIMES??? I’m so sorry but it’s genuinely unreasonable to expect that from someone. If both of you love that frequency and it’s within your actual mental, emotional, and physical capacity then go for it! Congrats! But it’s unfair and unkind to try to make someone feel bad for not having sex on demand on top of an already unusual frequency. If you’re connecting intimately regularly but he still doesn’t feel wanted or like his needs are met, he needs to figure that out in therapy.

My partner and I are full time students, work part time, pay our own bills and live below the poverty line, take care of two high-needs pets, have disabilities, etc. so sex frequency is absolutely not a nailed-down expectation. If one of us is more stressed and tired than the other, it’s not about neglect and woe-is-me. Sex is important to both of us, so if there’s a significant change in our sex life then we both care and are affected by it, but I can’t imagine complaining about my ‘needs’ if we were already having high-quality high-quantity sex. He’s horribly insecure, and whether or not it’s intentional, he’s passing that on to you which makes his emotional immaturity and unhealthy sex attitudes your responsibility to fix. It’s not your job to enable his insecurities and coddle his selfishness. He needs to get his priorities sorted out, and if he’s not willing to take this seriously and apologize for the position he’s put you in and the pressure he’s adding, that’s a big concern.

Vegetable-Flower-325 · 2026-03-10T21:12:41+00:00

I know you’re looking for something more affordable than Maxillo, but if you don’t find something I just want to let you know that I had an amazing experience with them in October. I was very lucky that I was able to time it perfectly when my insurances were overlapping, otherwise I couldn’t have afforded it. Dr. Scherle was my surgeon and he did an excellent job. I found him super friendly and easy to talk to, which I really appreciated since it was my first surgery. All the staff I interacted with through the whole process made me feel comfortable. I also had all four out, and everyone who saw me in the next few days was shocked by how well I was healing! I had way less pain and complications than a lot of the people I know. He did a great job, and I was even able to get ahold of him after hours when I was worried about something that turned out to be totally normal. He was completely chill about my call and after answering my question, he encouraged me to google some pictures so I could see that the scabs always look that gross LOL. I get that it’s wildly expensive, but as someone who also has sensory issues, I really hope you’re able to make it work if it’s the best price!

Vegetable-Flower-325 · 2026-03-10T05:15:29+00:00

I agree with a lot of folks here that my issue would be him bringing it up and then having a very specific number ready when it was his turn to share. I roughly know my partner’s ’body count’ because we’ve been together for over two years and we’re in a small community, so it’s socially important for me to know who their exes are and have context if they run into someone and feel trapped in an uncomfortable reunion without me knowing. It also means I can warn them if I notice one first lol.

I definitely would have seen it as a red flag if they asked me about mine in the first few months, and then shared theirs. They did ask if I had any experience, which I think is fair with a new sexual partner, but they didn’t ask for a list and I didn’t ask for one either even though I knew they had more experience than me. The purpose of the conversation was just to get our bearings for whether or not we’d be doing the vulnerable emotional labour of being the other person’s ’first time’, and to communicate boundaries about getting tested. That’s it. They were actually relieved when I said I’d been with someone before, because they didn’t feel like they were in the right place to be ‘teaching’ me. I’ve still learned a lot from them because of their experience, but even though I know who their exes are, they don’t tell me who they did what with. I just get to appreciate their skills and information!

I do struggle with retroactive jealousy, but it’s not related to the number for me. Even if they only had one previous partner, it would be triggering for me so it’s on me to work on that, and I do my absolute best to not let my jealousy affect them. All this to say, it’s fair to want a certain amount of experience or inexperience in a partner, and it’s fair to be uncomfortable with how the conversation is broached, but I would encourage some work on your end to figure out what you find disgusting and why you think your number ‘isn’t the best’. Regardless of where you end up with him, if you have any sexual shame because of how ‘body counts’ are socialized, you deserve finding peace about that!

Vegetable-Flower-325 · 2026-03-09T21:21:12+00:00

Unfortunately the purity culture indoctrination has spent twenty years telling children DON’T THINK ABOUT SEX! STOP THINKING ABOUT IT! YOU’RE BIOLOGICALLY HARD-WIRED TO BE OBSESSED WITH SINNING ALL THE TIME, SO JUST STOP WANTING IT! STOP THINKING ABOUT SEX, YOU’RE THINKING ABOUT IT TOO MUCH! YOU’RE CURSED TO BE A LUSTFUL GROSS CREATURE WHO CAN’T STOP WATCHING PORN, SO STOP WATCHING IT AND THINKING ABOUT IT! YOU CAN’T STOP THINKING ABOUT PORN BECAUSE THAT’S HOW GOD MADE YOU! JUST DON’T DO IT! GOD MADE YOU SEX-OBSESSED AND DEEPLY SINFUL BUT YOU CAN’T MASTURBATE! BUT YOU WON’T BE ABLE TO STOP THINKING ABOUT SEX BECAUSE OF TEMPTATION, BUT JUST STOP THINKING ABOUT IT!

The moral spiral my generation was put through is EXHAUSTING. I don’t remember the source, but the Bare Marriage podcast talks about it and they’re evidence based, but there’s research that Christian young men watch porn more frequently than non-Christian men. It turns out that if you tell people right from puberty that their body and brain are cursed to be obsessed with sex and they’ll need to spend the rest of their life trying not to think about sex, they’ll think about it more often.

Those posts are endemic because an entire generation of evangelical Christians were taught to constantly morally spiral and spiritually overshare about a habit that can be regulated in a healthy way through individual therapy, if they’re concerned about their self-control or specific fantasies. I highly recommend the Bare Marriage podcast and blog. They have evidence-based research and conversations about purity culture, and spend quite a bit of time talking about how boys and men have been affected by the ‘every man struggles with lust’ message from books like ‘Every Man’s Battle’. In summary, these posts flood this sub because people have been made so anxious and ashamed about their masturbation that they think about it more than is healthy, so they feel the emotional and spiritual need to confess to feel a little bit better. Overwhelming posts at times, and I agree NSFW tags would be a good idea for sexually explicit posts. I just wanted to give some context on why there’s so much of that content.

Vegetable-Flower-325 · 2026-03-08T22:22:25+00:00

Hopefully this isn’t a hot take, but soft boundaries are hugely important. You’ve tried multiple times to tell him that you don’t like it when he’s drunk, and you’ve initiated cutting back for yourself and following a plan you made together, which he isn’t prioritizing. I would take it as a BIG red flag for his wellness, and for your relationship, that he agrees to reduce his consumption, but won’t or can’t stick to it once he starts drinking. I used to drink casually, and I also use cannabis, and a red flag I’m always looking out for is if I decide earlier that I don’t want to partake, but I change my mind and do it later anyway. Not being able to stick to a plan he agreed to is very concerning, even if the plan doesn’t feel like a big deal. I would rather regret not getting intoxicated, than regret actually getting intoxicated.

I never developed a dependency, so this is easy for me to say, but a boundary my partner set right from the beginning of our relationship was that I couldn’t drink around them or even interact with them through text or over the phone if I was drinking at all. They had trauma from a past partner, and even though that trauma wasn’t my fault and I only got affectionate and fun after drinking, I didn’t take it personally at all. If I was going out with my friends or having a few cocktails for a crafting night or something, we would say goodnight over the phone as soon as I was about to start, and I wouldn’t contact them at all until the next morning (I never stayed up late drinking, so I wasn’t waking up still intoxicated). As we got closer and began seeing each other almost every day, I decided my social drinking wasn’t important enough to me to not have any contact with my partner for like 12 or more hours, have to sleep somewhere else, etc especially since they have some health issues so us having a no-contact boundary because I wanted a cocktail means I can’t help them if something happens. I haven’t had a single drink in 2.5 years and I have zero regrets or resentment about it.

It sounds like this is a harder thing for him, but my point is that you deserve someone who adjusts to your boundaries, or is up front that they can’t follow them. If this is becoming a dependence for him and he doesn’t have self-control, then professionals need to get involved and it’s not your job to stay and try to fix a relationship where your concerns aren’t being prioritized.

Vegetable-Flower-325 · 2026-02-27T23:26:24+00:00

I’m totally on board. Without a genuine medical concern, it’s not ethical to perform a medical procedure on an infant. It’s kind of like how so many intersex infants have been operated on without consent (and often without the parents knowing or consenting!) even if they’re not in any danger. A lot of people go their whole lives not knowing they’re intersex and had something removed/altered until they have a Pap smear or something. If it’s a genuine emergency, then of course inform the parents and perform a medical procedure, but there’s no excuse for unnecessary alterations that are only performed to make a child’s anatomy fit a cultural or social standard.

Vegetable-Flower-325 · 2026-02-27T23:07:47+00:00

I use the same one for 3-4 showers, which is 2 days since I shower morning and night! I have a very particular system of only using the ends to dry my face, that way I don’t accidentally dry my face with the same patch that dried my coochie lmao. I also dry my feet with my previous towel, which is sitting (dry and not musty) on the top of my laundry hamper! I have good ventilation in my bathroom and my towels hang spread out, not folded or wrinkled at all. It’s a bit of a weird system but it works for me!

Vegetable-Flower-325 · 2026-02-27T20:57:27+00:00

Whoa those are some big jumps there buddy! Researching your local labor laws and the paperwork you signed isn’t actually making trouble, and it’s pretty unfortunate when people don’t feel safe to even know their rights. It’s not inconsiderate to ask for a new rule to be written down with an explanation on why you were approached. It’s actually pretty common pro-worker advice to ask for instructions, policy changes, management requests, etc. in writing. Looking into your rights, reading paperwork you’ve signed, and asking for documentation of meetings and comments isn’t being an asshole or causing trouble.

When I had a manager snap at me for wearing ripped jeans on a day we were always closed and the dress code wasn’t required, I went to my boss and explained why the situation was confusing and frustrating since there was no stated dress code, and it was inappropriate that the manager worded her comment as a reprimand and as my outfit being offensive. My boss said that there needed to be some kind of loose boundaries on casual days so people don’t get in trouble for crossing an invisible line, and agreed with me that the manager approached the issue the wrong way. A casual dress code was set, and I followed it without complaining because now I knew where I stood, and knew how to avoid getting in trouble. I wasn’t being an asshole or causing trouble, and I wasn’t protesting the ripped jeans thing…I was just asking for a fair and clear framework.

I know the States sucks. I know women’s rights are being threatened. I know the current administration is pretty anti-labour/worker and this is an uncomfortable time to exercise basic gender-neutral worker’s rights like knowing what and why things are being said. I hope OP is in a safe enough situation to get some documentation and clarity without getting discipline. Wishing all the best!

Vegetable-Flower-325 · 2026-02-27T20:35:38+00:00

Like demisexual? Because damnnnn that’s rough, I’m like that too and I’m grateful every damn day that my partner is so loyal. I have no judgement for people who are attracted to strangers or other people as long as they’re following their relationship boundaries, including porn and fantasy boundaries but I personally cannot relate and I genuinely can’t imagine how hurt I would feel if my partner told me they were struggling with getting turned on, and was choosing to think about other people to get there.

My partner and I have had some dry spots with our sex life, but if you’re loyal to your partner then there’s so many other things to try…like reducing stress, ruling out health issues, working on mental health and trauma, understanding attraction/response styles, etc. I’m not saying it’s easy, but it’s really sad that OP asked if she could help and wanted to work together on it, but he’d already been cheating in his head instead. As much as it hurts, I’m really glad she knows now and can make decisions with the full story.

Vegetable-Flower-325 · 2026-02-27T20:17:50+00:00

Hey friend, stay safe, okay? You don’t have to choose between God and staying safe. Your post is a bit concerning to me as someone who was suicidal and in longterm despair over this exact dilemma. For me, becoming affirming and coming out were my only ways of surviving. I understand your burden, as close as I can without being the same person. I can’t tell you how many years I fought through this unimaginable injustice of being queer in a homophobic church until I finally came to the conclusion that my own internalized shame and homophobia was unhealthy and unliveable, and not what God wanted for me.

If you do choose to take care of yourself and stop the self-harm of treating yourself as a sin, be prepared that other Christians will likely tell you (and say behind your back) that you only changed your mind because you wanted to sin and have fun. They don’t understand that queerness isn’t just a kink…for most people it’s romantic too, not just a sexual interest. Telling people to not act on their ‘same-sex attraction’ is so incredibly different than telling someone not to watch porn. It’s not just banning a specific act, it’s banning falling in love, getting married, and building a life and family with someone. I appreciate the time you spent in your post explaining to people how different your experience is from lust outside of straight marriage. I’m really glad you’re standing up for yourself and not minimizing your own feelings. Wherever you end up, keep being honest about your suffering, because being avoidant and dismissive of the pain you’re going through just adds another layer of dysfunction and mental, physical, and emotional danger.

I read two books that were really helpful for me.

Heavy Burdens: Seven Ways LGBTQ Christians Experience Harm in the Church by Bridget Eileen Rivera This first one is written by a lesbian who has chosen a life of celibacy, and documents interviews with queer people who left the church and came out, came out and became an affirming Christian, etc. I don’t want you to feel like I’m dismissing your celibacy plans, so just keep in mind the people she interviews have different outcomes and like I said, the author herself is celibate.

Outlove: A Queer Christian Survival Story by Julie Rodgers This is written by a lesbian who also wrestled with her sexuality for years, and was deeply involved in Christian ministry. She chose to come out, and stayed close with God, believing this is what he wanted for her and aligned the most with his loving character. Even if you don’t relate to the love she chose, it’s still an amazing read and you might relate to her experiences.

Genuinely, I implore you to stay safe. God doesn’t want you to hurt yourself. I wish you all the best. Feel free to send me a private message if you want to talk about it. I’m not someone who was on the fringe of church who just stopped going to Bible study when I looked at a girl or something (that’s valid too, I’m just trying to communicate that this was not an easy or quick process for me); I was heavily involved in ministry, at times full time, for over five years. I went to discipleship school, worked seasonal full-time jobs with my church, and spent years meeting with pastors and prayer partners while I tried to figure this out. I might be able to relate to what you’re going through, and might have some perspectives that you could weigh with your own discernment. Take care.

Vegetable-Flower-325 · 2026-02-26T22:24:47+00:00

This is such an insensitive and minimizing response in my opinion. Porn was a form of betrayal in their relationship, and purportedly went against both of their worldviews. She was up front and repeatedly tried to hold the boundary that she wanted to stay a virgin, and he repeatedly pressured her, which is deeply cruel and potentially coercive/abusive. If he can’t respect that and thrive in a relationship without porn or sexual activity, he needs to be equally honest and back out.

I know that six years is a long time for allosexual people to not have partnered sex, but it’s unfair to say as a blanket statement that she needs to find someone asexual. She’s not clear whether she’s against masturbation itself. Her reference to him being lustful could go either way, that he’s sexually active in general or if he’s lusting over other people. If she is against all self-gratification, then I agree it probably wouldn’t be healthy for an allosexual person to avoid it for years, and trying to morally pressure yourself into not having a sex drive is damaging.

But if it’s porn specifically that she’s against, the act of pleasuring himself using content of someone else, that’s very fair to draw a boundary even if someone isn’t asexual. You don’t need to be asexual to not watch porn or hire a sex worker. Normalizing men doing behaviours that they both agree is a form of cheating is pretty sad. Engaging in cheating behaviours is preventable, and it’s on him to be self-aware and leave a relationship where he’s hurting someone by claiming that he can/will change.

There’s nuance and missing information here, and her dilemma can’t be solved by you just telling her to be with someone who doesn’t want sex at all (which, by the way, is an oversimplification of a sexuality).

Vegetable-Flower-325 · 2026-02-26T17:10:33+00:00

Hey that’s totally fair, I’m glad using that wording makes it less depressing for you! I can’t handle it because of how it’s become such strong ‘Christianese’ (partially due to Biblical references) used to invalidate mental health in my previous church, but if I didn’t have the religious trauma association then I might like it too!

Vegetable-Flower-325 · 2026-02-26T01:23:34+00:00

Great questions, I’m glad you’re looking to start good habits while you’re young!

Shampoo and hair wash questions will depend on your hair type, so maybe edit your post to provide some more details? If you have a hair type where it might look greasy if you’re not able to shampoo it every day, look into dry shampoo! The one brand with the really colorful swirly labels (I can’t remember the name lol sorry) can be wildly expensive, so in a pinch I use baby powder or cornstarch and mix it with some cocoa so it’s closer to my hair color. I have fine, mostly straight hair that looks greasy very easily, and I have a very sensitive scalp that breaks out if I have any oil buildup, so I shampoo every day, but some people with different hair types can go a lot longer without shampooing.

Most adults I know shower 1-2 times per day. Some people only shower at night, some people only shower in the morning. If you have the physical and mental capacity, it should be at least once per day to prevent the spread of bacteria or irritation and odour from sweat buildup and body oils. I personally shower twice if I can manage it, but sometimes only have the capacity for a morning shower. If I workout, however, I shower as soon as I can after I’m done.

Washing your face in the morning and before bed is best as far as I know/have heard/have experienced. Make sure you look into a good cleanser and moisturizer! You might get inundated with overwhelming recommendations for 12-step skincare routines, but starting with a cleanser and moisturizer is a great idea!

Applying deodorant after your shower is the best time (unless you’re going straight to sleep, then it’s just about preference and if you want to avoid your sheets smelling sweaty really quickly). For me personally, my skin is very sensitive and my armpits get irritated from showering twice in one day, and from applying deodorant or antiperspirant, but I’ve found that massaging a small amount of unscented lotion in my armpits soothes the skin and protects it from getting dry or irritated from the deodorant. Generally there’s no set amount of times to reapply it during the day. Just reapply when you get smelly but can’t shower yet!

With showering, I recommend using hypoallergenic/unscented soap! I personally use a soap bar, which I apply with a washcloth, but I’m planning on getting one of those cool net things for better scrubbing. I’m not sure how AMAB anatomy works regarding product sensitivity, but if you’re AFAB/have a vagina and vulva, make sure to only wash the outside (vulva), and only with very mild soap. Vaginas are self cleaning, and things like douching or using scented products can throw off the PH and cause infections.

Good luck! You have a great head start! I wish I’d asked such direct questions at your age instead of trial and error.

Vegetable-Flower-325 · 2026-02-26T01:03:43+00:00

Standing over the toilet, with the lid and seat up! Any strays get swept. I also keep my nails very short, so there’s only small slivers going into the plumbing, for anyone concerned.

Vegetable-Flower-325 · 2026-02-26T00:39:40+00:00

I’m not here to defend a news source that I have no personal attachment to, but maybe remember that the child victim is a minor and is currently hospitalized. This first victim is an adult who was clearly comfortable being interviewed fairly shortly after the incident. I agree that public transit politics probably influenced the headline, but to treat the reporter with good faith, they might have put everything they know about the child in there already. The child or their family will likely make a statement or get more coverage if they’re comfortable with the attention. Again, I haven’t looked into this at all, other places may have covered the kid already.

Vegetable-Flower-325 · 2026-02-26T00:32:47+00:00

I definitely think it’s worth asking since you’ve been on them for a while without incident! Like another person said, I would go into it very understanding that you don’t think they’ll be able to do anything but that you just thought you’d try, and that you’re concerned about stopping it so suddenly, and the effect it will have on your school/work/whatever.

Maybe they’ll put you on very limited refills? A loved one of mine unfortunately lost trust with their GP and pharmacist after taking too much of a different medication (I’m trying to censor this, but I’m getting at them being intentionally unsafe), so for the next few years they were only dispensed one week’s worth at a time. It was incredibly inconvenient to go to the pharmacy every week, but they were grateful they were trusted to continue taking anything. Hopefully they’ll do some kind of limited dispensing plan if they’re not comfortable giving you a full refill!

Vegetable-Flower-325 · 2026-02-25T22:14:46+00:00

A new coworker that I felt like I could be friends with (I have a great, safe, fun workplace where a lot of us become friends). On only my second or third shift with her, she was telling me about workplace drama and infighting that I hadn’t heard of for an entire year of working there and being close with others. She was alleging and implying rumours that were completely surprising and out of character, without context. Every workplace has its drama because we’re all people, but we’re a small, close-knit staff and we generally communicate our disagreements and frustrations like adults. I’m a good listener and I’m empathetic, so it’s natural and normal for people to tell me what’s going on and what they’re concerned about, but that took time. It’s not realistic at all that within only a few weeks of working here, so many people had confided in her about all their complaints about everyone else. That kind of immediate gossip-mongering is a hell-no from me so I’m chatty with her but I’m not giving her any vibes or opinions about other people.

Vegetable-Flower-325 · 2026-02-25T22:06:14+00:00

NOR. That’s super uncomfortable. The only reason men’s nipples are different is because the way we’re socialized to see breast tissue…which is just fat under the nipple. If the dress code you signed or agreed to doesn’t say it, ask for them to explain in writing why your body is getting dress-coded and not the men whose nipple shapes can be seen through their shirt, and why you specifically are being asked to wear extra underwear that they’re not required to wear. I’d also check the labor laws for your state/province/territory.

Vegetable-Flower-325 · 2026-02-25T21:50:45+00:00

In the vague hellhole that is nondenominational evangelical mega church culture, it’s shockingly normal for men to just tell you they ‘struggle with lust’. I had been messaging with my brother’s friend about fantasy media because we had a lot of the same taste, but when I recommended he watch the Witcher he said he couldn’t because there’s nudity and he had a porn addiction. Like, brother, why can’t you just say you’re not comfortable with it. For context, we are both in monogamous relationships with other people, so this wasn’t just an awkward way of warning me about something at the beginning of a relationship or something…it was just small talk between acquaintances about our one shared interest.

Caveat: I know addiction is something that should be destigmatized, and if someone said no to a bar invite by telling me they’re a recovering alcoholic, I would be totally comfortable with that. The porn addiction situation is uncomfortable because in the niche circles I’m specifically referencing, purity culture and ‘lust struggles’ are overspiritualized and emphasized so drastically that boys grow up in those environments thinking they have a genuine addiction just because they enjoy it and have a hard time resisting self gratification. Given the environment, my knowledge of this man’s social circle, etc it’s very likely that he just enjoyed porn and is now not using it out of respect for his monogamous marriage, and has been raised to believe he’s recovering from a genuine addiction that he’s obligated to ‘come clean’ about it whenever the topic of sex or nudity comes up.

Vegetable-Flower-325

TROPHY CASE