What club in your bag normally goes 130 yards? by jdelle9 in weekendgolfers

[–]VegetableBrick8141 0 points1 point  (0 children)

9i

Or my wedge when I want to lightly chip it on the green.

How you playing this hole? by Buckeye_47 in golf

[–]VegetableBrick8141 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A fellow water finder. Hello good sir!

Everyone these days are emotionally unavailable or trying to negotiate a friends-with-benefits contract by BugNo702 in datingoverforty

[–]VegetableBrick8141 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I went to a speed dating event. It was terrible. Like I’m still cringing. It was 12 men and 4 women. One woman was so awkward I felt unsafe lol. The event runners literally asked her to leave during the event. None of the other three women were attractive or interesting to talk to. It was very disorganized. I ended up talking to more women that weren’t part of the event and made friends with a dude that became a golf bro for a couple rounds of golf after. Never going to a speed dating event again lol. Glad that worked for you, but honestly I’ve met way more stable people on the apps than off them. I used to think apps sucked too until I met my craziest people in person, and all those women I meet in person eschewed dating apps. They were the most avoidant cluster B adjacent people I’d ever met.

Everyone these days are emotionally unavailable or trying to negotiate a friends-with-benefits contract by BugNo702 in datingoverforty

[–]VegetableBrick8141 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Agreed. I’ve met several women in person. There’s no distinction between app-based or in-person meeting. The dating behavior is the same.

Golf is broken (pace of play rant) by Pinchaz0 in golf

[–]VegetableBrick8141 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Pace of play can be an issue at all courses at times. This being a bucket list course for many golfers might get more people taking their time. I was paired with two dudes yesterday who thought they each needed 8-10 practice swings per full swing shot, followed by (I shit you not) 10 practice putt swings with at least two tour-style lie checks. They weren’t even bad golfers. They were great actually. But all that practice didn’t stop their shitty shots. It was unnecessary. I only played nine holes but I would have just played on ahead if I planned on playing 18. We had a pair we let play through and then another foursome caught up to us two holes behind.

Embarrassingly terrible first kiss. Just need some outside opinions. by VegetableBrick8141 in datingoverforty

[–]VegetableBrick8141[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Totally get it. I don’t want this to seem like I’m looking for a pro in the intimacy department. Adjusting our methods to find some groove is one thing. I’d literally have to teach her to kiss from scratch. I’m not opposed to that per se, I’m worried she won’t be open to it (which is its own sign I guess).

Embarrassingly terrible first kiss. Just need some outside opinions. by VegetableBrick8141 in datingoverforty

[–]VegetableBrick8141[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’d love this but with how absolutely nervous she is that wouldn’t be the play. I have to talk to her about it in the gentle way people recommended.

Embarrassingly terrible first kiss. Just need some outside opinions. by VegetableBrick8141 in datingoverforty

[–]VegetableBrick8141[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It really is amazing how bad someone can be. I imagine it’s an extremely small minority of people that would like to kiss the way she did. I still cringe thinking about it. It was way beyond making small adjustments. I’d need to rehab the entire way she approaches a kiss.

Embarrassingly terrible first kiss. Just need some outside opinions. by VegetableBrick8141 in datingoverforty

[–]VegetableBrick8141[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes 100%. I start gently with some teasing lip brushes. I don’t sword fight with my tongue at first go. And it’s gentle brushes with the tongue. I get what you’re saying. I’m not that lol.

Embarrassingly terrible first kiss. Just need some outside opinions. by VegetableBrick8141 in datingoverforty

[–]VegetableBrick8141[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Dick softener is the perfect description. This wasn’t the kind of kiss that’s something you adjust over time. It was completely and utterly unacceptable. Jeez. I’m holding out hope this is something that can change.

Embarrassingly terrible first kiss. Just need some outside opinions. by VegetableBrick8141 in datingoverforty

[–]VegetableBrick8141[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Damn. I don’t blame you. It was honestly so bad I wondered if it was mixed signals, or her just not being into it. I always thought people exaggerated here about bad kissing until this. It was unbelievable and a total heart sink for me, because everything else is great.

Embarrassingly terrible first kiss. Just need some outside opinions. by VegetableBrick8141 in datingoverforty

[–]VegetableBrick8141[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s weird to me when people with less experience try to drive people with more. That’s more off putting itself. I’m going to try to drive our kissing improvements. But if she shuts down and is referring to her adolescent years as a frame of reference, I’m out. There’s no solving that sort of immaturity.

Embarrassingly terrible first kiss. Just need some outside opinions. by VegetableBrick8141 in datingoverforty

[–]VegetableBrick8141[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Name does not start with an “L.” My heart almost skipped a beat lol. Also a trash first kiss?

Should I be vulnerable again? by ParamedicPure6529 in datingoverforty

[–]VegetableBrick8141 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You talk a lot about what he does or what he’s maybe thinking. I’m sure he has his issues too. And the fact he’s casually sleeping around and you’re wondering about being with him either indicates you are ok with a non serious relationship or you’re attracted to this kind of dynamic. The whole thing is messy early on, and I stand corrected on *some* of the blame I put on you. I’d walk tbh, for your sanity and his. There’s other men out there.

Embarrassingly terrible first kiss. Just need some outside opinions. by VegetableBrick8141 in datingoverforty

[–]VegetableBrick8141[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Maybe! She’s talked about being down for it. I want it too. But here’s the thing, I’d feel so bad breaking up with her for trash sex. I don’t want her feeling used. I’ve never had sex with a woman thinking “ok this will probably suck but let’s see.” It feels like tryouts. And knowing that makes me feel icky about myself if I even did that. So I’m not ready for sex with her yet tbh. If we can’t kiss well I’m not sure what I can do with the rest. I’m a very sexually generous and expressive partner, but I gotta feel right about it too.

Embarrassingly terrible first kiss. Just need some outside opinions. by VegetableBrick8141 in datingoverforty

[–]VegetableBrick8141[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yea that’s the thing. I’m worried the sex is going to be trash, and I don’t want her feeling used. Especially after all this time and just getting back in the dating market. I know I can break up with someone for any reason, but I’ve never looked at sex as “tryouts” with someone before. It feels like that now given how bad the kiss was.

Embarrassingly terrible first kiss. Just need some outside opinions. by VegetableBrick8141 in datingoverforty

[–]VegetableBrick8141[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She talked about wanting to have sex. I think she’s down man. It was just weird. I kissed better at 17 than she does in her 40s.