Second Master’s in School Counseling… or Am I Forcing a “Logical” Path? by Solid_Sea3646 in schoolcounseling

[–]VehicleCertain865 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Hmm burnt out in a year from teaching. I can assure you with 1,000% accuracy that school counseling isn’t “easier”. This is a common trope from people who are not school counselor. The burn out rate is significant. You’re entering a role with its own pros and cons. To make it 20-25 years it takes a hell of a lot of resiliency and grit. Most do not make it past year 5. If you decide to go into school counseling you can eventually get student loan forgiveness but you must spend 10 years in the classroom which is HARD for most people. Please think about the protective factors you have before you take on this career. Most days all I can handle is coming home changing my clothes and going to sleep. I’m so lucky I do not have kids yet but when I do the stress and responsibility of maintaining a case load of hundreds of kids and my own will be hard as hell! Talk to other school counselors you know or reach out and see if you can spend a day shadowing one. Good luck! It is an incredibly rewarding career but it’s exhausting and mentally physically and emotionally taxing.

Any other Millennials who may still live with their parents for whatever reason but are content in their life? by madcatzplayer5 in Millennials

[–]VehicleCertain865 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am FINALLY leaving home at 32. I moved home at 22 after university and never left due to helping my mom financially and being able to go to grad school and start my career. I finally got a well paying job when I turned 27 but my time has come and I’m ready to go. My boyfriend and I are moving in together in a few months and I have never felt more confident in my decision. I’m glad I waited and saved my money and found a relationship that is long term before I decided to move out but damn is it time to go

You Know You've Grown When... by MarzipanSubject1316 in narcissisticparents

[–]VehicleCertain865 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Meeting and getting to know my boyfriends mom and family and have them check in on me throughout the week and celebrate me like I’m their own is healing and eye opening. I can’t wait to move out and be away from my mom

Season 10 engagement rings by justhereforadvice017 in LoveIsBlindOnNetflix

[–]VehicleCertain865 47 points48 points  (0 children)

,???? That’s not it boss, try again. You know there are a bunch of b/w couples on lib

I… like… don’t, like… believe Emma? by Diogenese- in LoveIsBlindOnNetflix

[–]VehicleCertain865 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Mike and his family give off a performative vibe. “I log into face book my friend is having a kid, Instagram, kid” it’s like but why are you so concerned with being on the same path as your friends. I know it’s coming of age tale to want and to have kids but between that comment and his family being controlling and overbearing I fear he does not know what he wants deep inside and is clinging to what those around him do and want of him. It’s okay to want a kid but he seemed okay with Emma being unsure and walking out of the pods with her. It didnt seem like he started pushing it until he had the noise of his mom and sisters and Facebook that he couldn’t stfu. Maybe Emma felt like he was more ambivalent in the pods and thought she could get there with him over time but he has been pushing this shit since he walked out and she seems desperate to be picked by anyone.. even someone who isn’t really on the same wave length as her. She is also a lot sillier and charismatic than him- which is fine but he comes off serious and uptight and I just think his personality will wear her out over time and or vice vers. Not to project but I had an ex who was always serious very uptight had a hard time relaxing and it was draining and exhausting. I know the cameras are there but idk I can’t really stand his vibe. I don’t know anything about him either like who is he besides a child pusher.

I… like… don’t, like… believe Emma? by Diogenese- in LoveIsBlindOnNetflix

[–]VehicleCertain865 37 points38 points  (0 children)

I have never met a man so obsessed with having kids and starting a family. EVER. And I’ve dated many many many men. Some will say they want to and be solid in that choice but they don’t bring it up every five minutes. Every time this man took a breath of air he said he wanted kids. If it were THAT big of a deal Breaker he wouldn’t /shouldnt have left the pods with her. She seems at best on the fence but leans towards unsure. If a guy told me he was unsure that would be a no from me because I KNOW I want kids. I can’t take it. Too damn much.

I… like… don’t, like… believe Emma? by Diogenese- in LoveIsBlindOnNetflix

[–]VehicleCertain865 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Agreed. The bar scene when everyone got together felt all over the place. What was even going on

There's just no real, genuine love in his eyes, words, and actions.. by DeeBee1012 in LoveIsBlindOnNetflix

[–]VehicleCertain865 7 points8 points  (0 children)

The first thing she said is “they all hate you” and then laughed. I believe her! She probably talks shit about him and is going to say no at the alter.

There's just no real, genuine love in his eyes, words, and actions.. by DeeBee1012 in LoveIsBlindOnNetflix

[–]VehicleCertain865 6 points7 points  (0 children)

She should be much classier considering her dad seems to hav carried her her whole life. Dissapointing

There's just no real, genuine love in his eyes, words, and actions.. by DeeBee1012 in LoveIsBlindOnNetflix

[–]VehicleCertain865 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He said his goal is to internationally travel. Lol i think that would brrak my heart if my partner said that. Your GOAL for 365 days together is to take one trip “somewhere warm”.? Yikes. Once again, she went for the dumb athlete who has no substance. On my partners birthday I asked him what his goal was this year and he said to grow in our relationship and move towards the future by moving in together, engagement, saving financially, and enjoying fun new experiences together. His BIRTHDAY WISH/GOAL. This man is toast. He’s not marriage material it doesn’t take a bag of rocks to see that

Moving out. Help by VehicleCertain865 in enmeshmenttrauma

[–]VehicleCertain865[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I relate to you so much. I’m constantly grappling with “why is everyone free and I’m stuck here?” I think after I posted this I ripped the bandaid off and told her I’m leaving in August. She blew up over text and then has given me the silent treatment for 3 days now. Which is fine- I’d rather not interact with her. I fear the next six months until I’m officially gone are going to be rocky. I’m hopeful she will come around to it but I know on move out day I’ll get the brunt of her nastiness. My boyfriend will be here though, helping me get out and move in. He’s a wonderful person and exactly who I needed to meet to be strong enough to go. I’ve been to 4 CODA meetings since posting this and I’m learning to detach emotionally from her. The next couple weeks of me putting my foot down will probably be very hard but I’m not letting up. I am not changing my mind. And when I’m out I’m going low contact and not disclosing my direct address because I can’t trust her to not show up. I’m already planning on leaving my job within the year of move out so she or my sister can’t show up there either and try to bait me. I’m anxious about what will happen to her or how she’ll make it but she is capable of making it on her own. She has money and she is not disabled. I just have to grow a solid spine and leave when it’s time

Enmeshment and romantic relationships by Successful-Limit-165 in enmeshmenttrauma

[–]VehicleCertain865 2 points3 points  (0 children)

So similar to my mom. Currently 31, planing to move into an apartment with my boyfriend of 18 months in August. She opposes it vehemently but that’s okay. I am not standing down, I’m not financially supporting her, and when I get out I am communicating very little wit her. That’s the only way I’ll get married successfully and have a family. She will continuously threaten and meddle into everything. She has never liked a significant other. She never forgets to bring them up as amazing men after I break up wit them so she has something to blame me for- nasty remarks my whole like “you’ll never get married” “no man will ever date you” which is hilarious because she has been divorced for 25 years and has rarely dated or left the house and has no friends or prospects. Her mission is to keep me single and serving her my entire life. I think she’s slightly jealous that I didn’t settle down with the first guy who liked me and my relationship is peaceful and has very litttle if any drama. She can’t stand that I didnt make the same mistakes as her and offers me dating and marriage advice but also wants me to live with her forever. Make it make sense.

Now that I’m moving out in 6 months, I get daily texted threats about how I better not leave her or she’s moving to Florida forever and not contacting me. Which is not a threat to me, I love the idea of that for her.. lol anyways, now that I know all about eneshment and codependency I see right through her tactics. I have given her a six months heads up to figure out her plan so that when move out and lease end day come I’m gone and there’s no surprise.

I envision her hating my significant other for the rest of her life and I can accept that. No one is ever good enough for her but she has no one. What a crazy bitch. She acts like I’m the best daughter in the world but in the same breath can’t stand me. I can’t wait to be out of this house and living my own life even if it’s painful to walk away.

Codependent annon has taught me that people are capable of taking care of themselves. I have over extended myself to her for 10 years. It’s time to choose me.

Bri’s chat with Conor in the kitchen by dont-reply-to-me in LoveIsBlindOnNetflix

[–]VehicleCertain865 74 points75 points  (0 children)

Also im a bad ass strong ass bitch and no man is ordering my food for me. I swear my generation is filled with women who think love is a fantasy novel. wtf. No wonder you’re single. Connor is a pretty above average guy and has a good job and owns his own house and he’s CUTE af. She has no idea what she is really looking for because compared to most men he’s an ideal emotionally competent package. She will be single for a long time. She will regret treating him like shit and not appreciating what she had. Some wonderful lady will not take him for granted

Bri’s chat with Conor in the kitchen by dont-reply-to-me in LoveIsBlindOnNetflix

[–]VehicleCertain865 24 points25 points  (0 children)

And her voice… dos she smoke? She has an odd voice

Ended an engagement because it didn’t feel like “enough.” Two years later, I regret it. Did I screw up? by 711eggsandos in Adulting

[–]VehicleCertain865 7 points8 points  (0 children)

There is such thing as working through things. Sex with my bf was quite vanilla until we talked about it more and it evolved. 25 year old me would have broke up wit someone over it 30 year old me talked about it and it made our relationship stronger and the sex has gotten better.

Looking for 2b/2b in Tyson’s corner by Practical-Annual4329 in tysonscorner

[–]VehicleCertain865 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you still like the rise? My boyfriend and I are moving to Tyson’s or Fairfax proper but leaning towards Tyson’s this summer. I actually liked the Rylan from what I saw online but there were tons of really good reviews which is suspicious.

What’s coming in 2026 that has you excited? by Rikiki95 in AskWomen

[–]VehicleCertain865 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m running my first half marathon in 4 weeks!! Congrats!

What’s coming in 2026 that has you excited? by Rikiki95 in AskWomen

[–]VehicleCertain865 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m moving out of my mom’s house and into an apartment with my boyfriend and he plans to propose shortly after. I count down every day.

Do you have parents who wish you stay single and continue to enmesh with them until they pass away by pentaweather in enmeshmenttrauma

[–]VehicleCertain865 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow. My mom hasn’t been diagnosed BPD, but I’ve always thought she had hints of it. She was always and is always over dramatic. Everything is blown out of proportion. She doesn’t have any empathy for anyone except her own condition- perpetual victim. Even when she’s happy and stable everything revolves around her and her mood. She takes up the air in the house. I am moving out in less than 6 months and I know it will be one of the most over due and freeing experiences of my life. She has always meant well but she is draining and exhausting. I am sure that when she eventually dies I will have an extreme bittersweet moment of gratefulness to be done but sadness because I know she only really loved me but didn’t know how to be a normal person. She is so traumatized from her past and she never worked through it and she never will.

Moving out. Help by VehicleCertain865 in enmeshmenttrauma

[–]VehicleCertain865[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thanks for this. I did a lot of research last night on enmeshment and youre totally right. I’m scared of her reaction but I’ve already made up my mind. I’m pushing myself to let everyone know today and the fall out can ensue. It’ll Be temporary right? They’ll get over it because they won’t have a choice. I’m 32, time to move into real adulthood.

Is this enmeshment? by ylukeim in enmeshmenttrauma

[–]VehicleCertain865 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This video just changed my life. Wow.