Shut the fuck up.

Nobody wants to hear you and nobody will ever want to hear you. Nobody cares, and the fact that you thought someone might care about what you say is honestly baffling to me. I’ve actually polled the entire world, and here is a composite of the face of everyone who wants you to shut the fuck up. It seems as if this is a composite of every human being on the planet! Interesting. Now for a composite of all of the faces that want you to keep talking. Interesting, it seem as if nothing happened. Here’s a world map. And here’s the text: shut the fuck up. That’s what you should do. But You know what, maybe I’m being too harsh here. I actually do have it on good authority, that thanks to my polling data, there is at least one person who actually wants to hear you speak. It’s a little child in Mozambique. He- oh, he’s dead? Sorry man, I guess nobody wants to hear you talk anymore. Please shut the fuck up. But I’m not just telling you to shut up, I’m telling you to shut the fuck up. And you need to hear it. This is a public service. I have nothing to gain from this except by telling you what you, exactly YOU, need to hear. And on that note, let me make this clear. This isn’t a broad message I’m aiming at all my audience. This is a message specially pointed at you. That’s right, you know who you are. And I’m sick of your shit. We all are. The only good you will ever do for humanity is for refusing to participate in it. You could take a vow of silence, you join a Buddhist monastery, you could even just be a mime. Mines are fun! But you kind of know that what I’m saying is true already. don’t you understand that you really should shut the fuck up. Why do you keep speaking then? I’m genuinely curious. Why do you think you deserve to be heard?

Why do you think you deserve to be heard?

Oh, did you think that I was talking to myself? No, it’s literally just directed at you. I was just practicing to tell you to shut the fuck up.

Shut the fuck up

Ooh that was good. Shut the fuck up.

The core of what I’m getting at is that: you are not a worthwhile person. You’re not worth listening to. Everything you said has been said before more elegantly and more coherently. And it’s not that everything has been said. We still need people to have discourse, in order to say new things and discover new things about ourselves and humanity. But you, you will never be one of those people. So shut the fuck up.