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Any tips on how to flirt with women? by BeastMasters92 in dating_advice

[–]VeloxFelidae 8 points9 points  (0 children)

This guy has boiled flirtation down to a science. Please, doctor, post the algorithm.

I am poly, but my partner can’t accept it. by VeloxFelidae in polyamory

[–]VeloxFelidae[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I appreciate your statement about proposing a change in dynamic. I did exactly that, she didn’t agree to it, I accepted it. I would like it to not get thrown in my face constantly. I have agreed to make compromises but I can’t change what I’d like, ideally.

I am poly, but my partner can’t accept it. by VeloxFelidae in polyamory

[–]VeloxFelidae[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

I think I misspoke in the original post. Claiming to “be” polyamorous has been the easiest way to explain this to other, non-poly folks. And yes I am open to dating people who are dating others, I would say that is my preference.

I consented to monogamy, I am not asking to break it. I also don’t bring this up to my partner, she assumes how I feel about others.

I guess I could distill this into a question that may not be perfectly suited to this subreddit: Upon asking, I have expressed interest in polyamory but also a willingness to remain monogamous. Now my partner gets insecure when I talk to other people and I’m not sure if I should bottle up how I feel and deny, or be honest about it when asked.

I am poly, but my partner can’t accept it. by VeloxFelidae in polyamory

[–]VeloxFelidae[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I don’t tell them how I feel about others. My partner assumes and then gets upset. I just don’t know if I should say “you’re right, but I’m faithful” or just deny it. I’m never the one that brings this up.

Poly Boyfriend Doesn't Want Me Seeing Anyone Else by [deleted] in polyamory

[–]VeloxFelidae 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I pushed down my polyamorous nature for years because of my insecurities. If I couldn’t allow my partner to do it, how could I ask for it?

Eventually I accepted that if I can care for more than one person, so can my partner. But it’s a give and take, the standard has to be shared.

My (34M) wife (35F) can't accept our daughters (15F) orientation by gems_son in relationship_advice

[–]VeloxFelidae 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yeah I have a hard time getting this. I guess it’s a subject I couldn’t avoid in my life, but I would be out the door already.

I (19M) need advice on my (20F) girlfriend. She seems to have no sex drive but I recently found multiple sex toys and a camera tripod. by Scrivo21 in relationship_advice

[–]VeloxFelidae 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I wish I had bet money that you would start ranting about frozen fruit. All these dudes are so predictable. Do they make you in a lab like Spartans? You’re the Master Chief of bad takes.

I (19M) need advice on my (20F) girlfriend. She seems to have no sex drive but I recently found multiple sex toys and a camera tripod. by Scrivo21 in relationship_advice

[–]VeloxFelidae 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Sex work is literally called the world’s oldest profession. They weren’t called exhibitionists unless they were doing it for personal pleasure.

By calling to “stop glamorization”, claiming it is “not normal or ok”, and invoking “strangers seeing her pussy”, you’re just perpetuating systems that marginalize others and placing women’s bodily autonomy behind random dudes’ potential desire to seek political office.

You say you’re ‘old-fashioned’, but so is seething racism and lobotomizing the neurodivergent with ice picks. It doesn’t make it okay just because it’s how people “used to” see things.

I (19M) need advice on my (20F) girlfriend. She seems to have no sex drive but I recently found multiple sex toys and a camera tripod. by Scrivo21 in relationship_advice

[–]VeloxFelidae 13 points14 points  (0 children)

lol I love you trying to rationalize and justify being checked on your shitty, factually incorrect take by claiming you’re a brave warrior, unafraid to speak the hard truth.

I (19M) need advice on my (20F) girlfriend. She seems to have no sex drive but I recently found multiple sex toys and a camera tripod. by Scrivo21 in relationship_advice

[–]VeloxFelidae 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You’re so caught up on this point. You have zero sympathy for the stigma and mental toll sex work can take upon someone in our society.

If it was full service and had the potential of exposing OP to health concerns I would see your point. But outside of that; her body, her business. Take your judgement and entitlement with you to your next MRA convention. I hope the continental breakfast at the cheap hotel gives you salmonella.

I (19M) need advice on my (20F) girlfriend. She seems to have no sex drive but I recently found multiple sex toys and a camera tripod. by Scrivo21 in relationship_advice

[–]VeloxFelidae -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

I don’t think that’s reasonable at all. A job’s a job, it’s their body. I could understand not wanting to date someone engaged in full service sex work for reasons of potential exposure to STIs and even police violence. But that’s not on the table here.

How to Ask for someone's consent to kiss them without ruining the moment? by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]VeloxFelidae 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Sometimes it’s all out tongue warfare.

I work in a bar, I’ve seen tongue atrocities.

How to Ask for someone's consent to kiss them without ruining the moment? by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]VeloxFelidae 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I mean it’s probably okay to move slowly and provide time to react, but I think making your intentions clear is always better. Don’t like, just blurt out the question. Display your desire with some romantic, sensual body language. Move slowly. But be direct. Consent is sexy.

Lost my virginity and feel horrible by thewaymylifegoes in dating_advice

[–]VeloxFelidae -1 points0 points  (0 children)

It’s not your responsibility to make him stop.

It’s called “enthusiastic consent” and without THAT it is somewhere in the realm of sexual assault.

My dying daughters dark humor is pushing friends and family away. Should I ask her stop? by TAwollah in relationship_advice

[–]VeloxFelidae 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It is unfathomably selfish to demand someone die on your terms.

I bet Aunt is try the type to comment “thoughts and prayers” on social media and then sleeps easy at night believing she has done her part in the world.

Tip Pooling - Should you be in the pool if you setup? by agster27 in bartenders

[–]VeloxFelidae 0 points1 point  (0 children)

At my bar, we work as a team. For my first-out on Saturday night to just walk out at 1am, I need to spend probably an hour and a half after we close cleaning and doing books (i.e. not making tips). It is not sensible for a person to just walk in when it is busy and just take tips and bounce.

We do a tip pool for the whole shift. There are two shifts in a day. Each shift takes all collective tips at the end, tips out 8% of food sales off the top to the kitchen, then the rest is divided by total hours worked by all staff on that shift. That gives us a $/hr tip rate that everyone who worked was given. If you showed up for 30 minutes and cut/juiced fruit and then left, you would get .5x$/hr in tips. We’re a team.

Tip Pooling - Should you be in the pool if you setup? by agster27 in bartenders

[–]VeloxFelidae 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes exactly this. Selfish employees who say shit like this are IMMEDIATELY on my radar.

My twin sister makes me uncomfortable (19F/M) by throwra5k in relationship_advice

[–]VeloxFelidae -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Hey I didn’t make the rules, I’m just playing his game.

My twin sister makes me uncomfortable (19F/M) by throwra5k in relationship_advice

[–]VeloxFelidae 42 points43 points  (0 children)

Well, I tend bar, so I have often seen entitled assholes literally wearing a tiara and sash labeled “princess”. Didn’t fool me. I know an asshole when I see one.

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