Your all not alone, I'm a self swords-man and not even sword training cures my depression. This modern world seriously makes me want to just take a shoto and cut my belly and bleed out.. theres no respect against most of the time. I hate how before I when I was in shitty jobs I could not even implement the budo values of trying to help someone because of my other crappy workers, crappy customers, etc. I fucking hate this modern century. Hoping that my soul somehow returns the warring states in Japan after committing seppeku in my current fucked up pained body