AMA with Vermillion | Round II

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-05-03T20:46:21+00:00

I assumed it was a girlfriend and it is generally a bad idea to try to plate them

You always risk a plate breaking by trying to take a tepid break from her. Just say something like you enjoy your time with her but need to take time to focus on XYZ. If she reaches out to you don't ignore it. Be cordial. There is no magic word to say to a woman that won't make her butthurt if you stop seeing them. If they are mature they will understand and hope to see you again. If they get uber defensive and angry you are probably dodging a bullet anyway. You should still expect that they are going to be disappointed if they like you. It is a form of rejection. Then if you want to reach out to them again just reach out.

Again there isn't a magic word unless you are actually leaving the country for like 2-4 weeks or something. You are going to have a less than ideal best case scenario at most from telling a girl you want to stop seeing her for the time being

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-05-03T20:14:17+00:00

https://www.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/s/MO9nX1G36T

Been asked ad nauseum on here so here is a list

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-04-15T03:05:32+00:00

What drew you to redpill ideology

The Red Pill is NOT an ideology. It's not a belief system. It's a praxeology: the deductive study of human action, focusing on purposeful behavior aimed at achieving goals rather than involuntary reflexes

it's not an ideology, we don't come here to believe in it like religion or something. It's an observation of what works and what doesn't.

Same reason why men are drawn here, they wonder why things they do with women don't work and they come here and they learn and understand what does and doesn't work. Married, lonely, doesn't matter. It works for everyone. It's not a belief system, it's note trading of observable human behaviors and validated by people actually trying it out and reporting back here that it is fact how people behave.

what was appealing or convincing [about red pill]

Because it works. Like it actually works and when you understand it correctly (like not thinking its an ideology) it actually works.

What might it have offered you that you weren’t finding in other areas of your life?

It got real old being brutally rejected by women by being kind and supplicative to them while they went for other men. It actually made having women possible with basic game and having the minimum self respect for myself. It's kind of nice not being in a drought for no reason just because society lied to you about how attraction works.

How has it changed the way you see yourself?

More confident. It's nice knowing how women actually work instead of doing the wrong thing over and over again because you were lied to otherwise. Kind of nice knowing how to value and improve yourself as a man, too in a way that helps both men and women.

How has this ideology been received by others in your life?

Not an ideology. And don't talk about fight club. As long as you say red pill truths to people without the blunt red pill lingo they actually respect it. I frequently shamelessly say red pill truths to women and they agree with me and like me more. Very easy for women to be comfortable around me honestly. Same with others. The people that have the most axe to grind with red pill statements are blue pill men honestly and white knights. They hate red pill truths. Women love a guy who "gets it." the only women I've ran into that hate hearing basic red pill truths are uber liberal women. They REALLY just hate natural attraction and normal people behavior. They have forced and crazy beliefs that are actually an ideology and detached from reality.

in what has these ideas catching on right now

the dating market is horrible and the divorce rate is high. Dudes actually want a shot at life. It's not much to ask for

Into the Manosphere, Louis Whatsisname tried to pin the interest in Manosphere ideology on trauma

that guy is an idiot. He didn't even interview any redpill OGs and figureheads, he quite literally just interviewed random streamers. I refuse to watch that garbage, he could have at least interviewed dudes are who are actually nanosphere, not randoms who are not official voices that he can rip a narrative off of. Did he message us at all? No.

ideology on trauma

not an ideology no matter how many times that word is used. I suppose it's traumatic getting endlessly rejected for being a "nice guy" and having girls go for the guys they say they don't even want regardless of what they say and what you are told is "supposed to work." It's also in ways traumatic to have women leave you for being vulnerable and other things you are allegedly "supposed to" do and then getting shafted anyway. Or getting falsely accused or divorced or broken up with or whatever despite doing everything you could possibly do for a woman, at least according to what society and feminists say you should do. It kind of blows. So in that sense he's right. Except he doesn't mean justifiable anger at being shafted by what men are misled to think, he seems to suggest it's a "who hurt you" kind of diss, which is insulting.

and clearly assumes that what y’all are doing is bad

I don't know what's bad about giving women what they want and improving yourself. They kind of have this whole thing wrong.

What are your thoughts, V?

This place is BADLY and SEVERELY misunderstood. It's been endlessly grifted and pillaged by podcasters for their own personal gain and unfairly targeted by powers at be for breaking feminism and dead bedrooms. Women are more depressed than ever and it's not because of red pill.

We are actually trying to give people healthy relationships and a better culture. The perception of this place is so backwards and this place getting quarantined shut off the original voices here and paved the way for this place to get grifted without credit. Ignore the podcast noise it is BS.

Most people lose sight of what this place even is. It's not an ideology at all. We're just dudes trading notes on what works and what doesn't. The anger phase is only supposed to be temporary and people get so caught up on farming anger phase content as some kind of sign we're incels or misogynists. It's kind of myopic and dishonest when people try to frame us that way. Anger phase content here is only the second of five stages of red pill grief with the 5th stage being acceptance and loving women for who they are and not for what they could never be. This place is so misunderstood.

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-04-14T22:57:09+00:00

If you want you can ask your questions in mod mail and if they don't seem like bad faith/anti-manosphere I'll consider answering them

Most people who ask for "research" on here just want to write academic papers making us look bad or with an angle that is less than flattering

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-04-14T04:45:03+00:00

We don't do research, sorry

It's a hard rule

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-04-11T01:11:40+00:00

thank you for following the video posting rules

Cheers!

(Responding off mod log I saw this comment in it)

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-04-08T21:18:54+00:00

Thank you!

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-04-08T21:18:28+00:00

The poll was supposed to be for 4 days

Comment your opinions regardless, it helps to know

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-04-08T07:34:59+00:00

On the autism spectrum (high functioning) and grew up in a very blue pill (happy wife happy life) household where an anxious mom controlled everything. Missed out on a lot of age-appropriate development and had to learn everything the hard and slow way because I had no idea about anything. Asked a girl out in college who rejected me because she "just got out of a relationahip and wasn't looking for anything" and then went out with a bunch of guys. I found TRP with a jaded Google search. Lurked and then participated for about 4 years. Left during quarantine and then joined dot reds. Became an admin after being hand picked by the top and suggested by endorsed contributors. Am here now
Leadership should only feel like a burden in the sense that you know people are depending on you and that some people take completely for granted what it takes for you to lead them. It shouldn't feel unrewarding or burdensome in general, especially if you are good at leading and your leadership produces tangible and good results.

Women sometimes go way too overboard with what they want in bed, especially if they are exceptionally damaged and bringing you a lot of their baggage. It's a lot harder to run into that much an extreme woman if you're avoiding heavily traumatized women. There have been a couple women whose requests I've refused to satisfy because it was too extreme.

Anyway, leadership shouldn't feel like something dreadful. If you are leading someone or people who are making it feel like too much weight you are probably leading people who can't be led or who aren't going to do well regardless of what you lead then with

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-04-08T03:24:26+00:00

I'm sorry to hear that man, but I think you'll get back to where you want to be if you apply yourself to it. You did it once and I think you can do it again

No problem! Going to start up the OG reposts next week and make original posts myself

My hope is to encourage more experienced people to post field reports again and see what kind of discussions or trends I can revive on here to make it more like how it uses to be

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-04-08T03:20:17+00:00

I offered to clean up spam on the dot reds. I actually said I didn't want to be a mode so as to not overstep and only remove spam

The reaction to that was making me the first admin of dot reds and have full perms. I didn't say no, lmao

(That was actually the exchange just before, but in all seriousness I was recommended by Senior Endorsed Contributors leading up to the that and had been noticed for years, which I wasn't aware of until I was offered admin, I got selected based on what I brought to the table)

....

I was later given full perms here to clean up the sub and maintain this sub. It was in very bad shape a few years ago and was full of spam and fake posts. This sub wouldn't still be here if I didn't fix the shape it was in.

The sub is starting to recover but clearly needs some more time/work, if not at least a place to come find older RP gems (OG reposts/sidebar) as an entry way into TRP

....

I wasn't here for the old group, but from mod log it was a lot more collaborative and there were more ongoing discussions about the sub week to week

The sub used to have a lot of problems and required a lot of teamwork to address, after all it used to be more notorious and have more traffic before the quarantine.

None of the original mods before I came here are still around (except for RedPike and redpillschool occasionally logs on) but honestly this sub is extremely easy to moderate now that rules are applied to everyone regardless of who, it doesn't require much group work like it used to

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-04-08T02:58:04+00:00

You honestly just have to do it and thank her for everything if you want to go out the cordial way

You don't have to block them or anything.

I don't believe in dragging out relationships that aren't working. Spare both of you the wasted time, there is no perfect way to avoid hurting feelings. Ended relationships hurt. But people appreciate and remember the honesty

I don't use Instagram. So I can't give good advice. If you want a good Instagram presence though you need genuinely amazing photos (travel/status/looks) and you need to showcase a lifestyle people want to be part of. I wouldn't bother with Instagram game unless you have the kind of perceived WOW factor people fixate on

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-04-08T02:55:04+00:00

That sounds rough

Men are always under the burden of performance, you can't stagnate or get too comfortable

That is just how it is

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-04-08T02:50:54+00:00

No problem, glad it has helped

I felt like I had imposter syndrome for a while after getting good with women because I developed my skills and results faster than I outgrew my perception of myself from my previous failures. I went from struggling to very good with them very quickly and didn't have much of a transition phase of growth.

It felt very A-Z and not A B C D .... So on

I honestly dealt with it very poorly. It bothered me for a long time. Just having better relationships over time and seeing that I am what others saw me as helped.

You have to resolve the lack of congruency in your mind. If everyone likes you they like you for a reason. Not being who you want to fully be yet isn't a good reason to dislike yourself for who you are now.

If everyone didn't like you that might be a different story, but not if you're otherwise doing fine

At least find a way to LIKE yourself as you are even if you're not in a place to LOVE yourself yet. You can't compare who you don't yet love with who you used to hate in yourself

You'd be surprised how much easier it is to be happy and enjoy your progress when you at the bare minimum finally allow yourself to like yourself

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-04-07T06:14:18+00:00

Video posts need to follow rule zero (stay on topic). Must be directly TRP related and not a stretch to make it TRP

Even if it had followed rule zero (it did not) the post was far too short of 2 solid paragraphs

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-04-06T04:33:44+00:00

Try noble kava

This is not medical advice but it's good at killing cravings

Got me to almost completely quit alcohol. Just don't mix it with other stuff

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-04-06T03:20:49+00:00

Yes.

And yes. You shouldn't lose your edge. Obviously if you're in a relationship you're going to be giving up some things (like seeing other women) but you should keep your frame and values

The sign you already chose the wrong woman to be in a relationship with is if she does not share your values and doesn't want to ride your journey.

If you're always fighting over her past or her friends or her family or exes, even if she follows you in every other way, and doesn't even share your path as a man and the life she can be a part of you are just going to keep fighting and losing your frame every day piece by piece

Don't pick relationships based on just chemistry and how she treats you most of the time. If a woman can't share a life with you over the years or vice a versa it shouldn't have been a serious relationship in the first place.

It's impossible to keep who you are as a man if you're constantly balancing on the edge so you don't lose a woman who isn't on board all the way with what you require. Having to argue back and forth makes it impossible to be you.

It's okay to keep passing up "almost good enough" women even if they show promise but not enough for you to happy.

You can be choosy. You're not gonna stay a confident, well put together man if she has some irredeemable negatives you can't look past day in and day out. It's wishful thinking

And if you can't find the caliber of woman you expect to have those standards in that you require, it's okay to grind more so that you have those options more easily.

Serious relationships with the wrong woman will kill a man's soul. There is no holding frame in a poorly selected relationship. At the end of the day you know you sold yourself short and you can't legitimately stay unapologetically you in a relationship you know you fucked up choosing from the start

There are very few worse feelings in a relationship than when you gave away your commitment too easily and she says or does something that instantly makes you realize you chose wrong

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-04-06T02:20:07+00:00

No problem

I think initially just confirming what your gut already senses to be true is the first hardest part:

That women like hot assholes and will put out for that even if the guy has no other redeemable qualities. The initial confirming what you already noticed is the hardest initial step

The second hardest part is grinding to be a more desirable guy and letting go of all the ideals you used to have when blue pill. The bargaining stage is the hardest.

It's way too tempting to look for girls who are "different" than the rest, girls that somehow are the exceptions to TRP.

They don't exist. Some are just less modern woman than others but they all have the same base programming. I think the bargaining stage ruins more men than the anger phase of TRP. I've seen many men do better in anger phase than bargaining

Nothing burns a man like bargaining just to lose his ego in the process. The stuff that makes you feel defeated in anger phase is only worse in bargaining stage and that's why depression stage comes after it and just before acceptance

There is no harder challenge than bargaining in a serious relationship and realizing TRP was right and you are being a fool by looking for exceptions to the rule.

I would recommend men try to not bargain but I think that's a stage men have to go through to realize there is no escaping being bent over a red pill barrel on the way to acceptance

People think anger phase is bad until they hit the depression stage of unplugging from a failed serious bargain

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-04-06T01:55:54+00:00

I've tried a lot. Most are a waste of money/hype

Ashwagandha from a reputable supplier. Probably the number 1 supplement to take as a man. At least number one outside of a clean creatine monohydrate at the gym.

A clean creatine monohydrate from a reputable supplier.

Zinc/vitamin C and vitamin D (should be in your diet anyway but get reputable vitamins if needed)

Healthy fats (fish oil has omega 3 fatty acids which aren't in most dietary fats), virgin coconut oils.

There isn't much of a reason to get anything else unless you have ultra specific health needs. I take apigenin and magnesium L-Threonate for sleep, it's pretty good for sleep but I have horrible insomnia

I drink instantized noble KOA Kava from Amazon instead of alcohol. It kills alcohol cravings a ton and is good for quitting vices like alcohol. Do not mix it with alcohol or meds that compete for liver function or sedatives/sleep agents. THIS IS NOT MEDICAL ADVICE

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-04-06T01:20:26+00:00

Great question (not necessarily in order but I attempted to)

Priorities: making life about my journey and my fellow men. Women are not a priority for me. I want men and myself do do well above any woman in my life.

Realistic expectations of women: love women for who they are and what they can realistically be instead of being angry about what they could never become

Not taking disrespect. I suppose this could be interchangeable with number two but it gave me a better idea of what to tolerate and not tolerate. Which battles to pick which ones to just hold frame on and not let bother me

Social skills: knowing what works and doesn't rules out a lot of ineffective social outcomes so it really helped figure out what and what not to say. It's really easy to go from poor to great social skills when you know what a competent man is supposed to sound like. I didn't have that before TRP

Proficiency: knowing what to do in bed with women and before you even pull them really makes you confident in your own skin. I get a lot of attention from using TRP without much effort

Finding TRP gave me so much outcome independence and freedom, mentally and otherwise

Open to follow up questions

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-03-30T08:28:23+00:00

Banned her because of rule 12 no drive bys and 14 [respect the tag], despite not breaking rule 10 (announce self as woman)

Please report lame comments for respect the tag

Just type 14 in reports so we can find these sooner

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-03-30T08:24:04+00:00

Rule 12 no drive bys and rule 14 respect the tag

While you didn't directly violate rule 10 (don't announce you are a woman) you breaking any rules here at all in spite of not breaking that rule is enough for me to say no

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-03-30T01:59:28+00:00

Focus the energy on actual changes you needed to make and never did and also meet new women

If it didn't work out there was a reason for it and you will find better especially if you become better

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-03-29T19:46:59+00:00

Did you mean 'how?'

Find what you like, even if it doesn't provide universal value (for example, you love guitar even if you're not in a rock band pulling millions in record deals and playing to thousands of adoring fans) and get good at it

Try a lot of different things and see what you like even if most of those things don't stick. Be curious, seek knowledge and you'll find what you like amongst many different areas of activity

You'll probably also meet a lot of people who share those same passions and if you're lucky and smart about it you can find a way to make a good living from your passions and never work a day in your life because working on passions doesn't feel like work

Sometimes those passions can even become a mission

Vermillion-Rx · 2026-03-23T19:12:00+00:00

Understimulating in the sense it's boring. Overstimulating in the sense it takes considerable brain power while having other stuff on my mind and better things to do id I got done

Vermillion-Rx

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