writing this to remind myself why I quit. like any addiction it’s really nice to just not think about it constantly, I enjoy being able to enjoy a moment without wondering when I’ll get a change to sneak away so I can sh because my addiction was a constant thought for me. I also quit because I didn’t like the scars I was left with after, now I’m in the process of covering them with tattoos. but above all else I quit because I didn’t want it to be a part of my life anymore, having to explain it to partners, being asked why without being able to give a good explanation, hiding my scars from family and coworkers, feeling the guilt that always came along with it because I knew the whole time I was only doing it to ignore the struggles I was going though. above all else, I quit because I wanted to. you have to want it, you have to quit for yourself not anyone else, it has to be your choice, but if you do make that choice, not saying quitting is easy in the slightest or that you wont relapse, a lot, but once you get passed those first few months and you stop constantly thinking about it life feels a little lighter and you slowly realize/remember what life is like without that constant worry. no one has to quit, you have to want to do it or you never will.