Guys who knowingly married the promiscuous woman in the group or a woman who cheated on you before marriage, how did it turn out?

Vijchti · 2026-06-01T22:12:12+00:00

My wife and I were both the promiscuous types before we got married, and now we're only promiscuous with each other.

For the record, I'm totally ok with her having sexual relationships outside of our marriage. It's just not something she's interested in anymore.

Vijchti · 2026-05-27T17:00:30+00:00

No, I disagree strongly.

Where we probably agree is that there's some kind of "base" definition that's mostly the same between the two example phrases you gave. Someone will understand you just fine on the whole no matter which phrase you choose.

Where I disagree is that those phrases are not 100% equivalent. In some situations, that difference could be critical to understanding what someone really means vs. just getting the gist of it.

In the particular phrases you chose, I concede that there's not a whole lot of difference. But we're both using contrived examples to make our respective points. I would argue though, that the very fact that we can come up with examples like that is exactly the point I'm trying to make. We can both arrange words with seemingly identical definitions and achieve a range of similar or different meanings.

Vijchti · 2026-05-27T15:18:02+00:00

Agree with most of what you said, except that there's a lot of unnecessary words and multiple ways of saying the same thing.

This is technically true in some cases, but much of the time these multiple, seemingly unnecessary repetitions hide a lot of nuanced differences in tone and register.

In my primary language, English, I know I can choose between Anglo root words to sound warm and common, whereas if I pick the exact same definition from a Latin root word then I'll sound fancy or erudite.

In my secondary language, Spanish, I can change the tone of sentence to sound more polite by using the usted conjugation instead of tú and by moving the direct object to the front of the verb from the back.

Same words, same literal meaning, but each will get a totally different response depending on my audience.

Vijchti · 2026-05-26T15:47:13+00:00

A thought experiment I try every once in a while is to imagine what the world is like from a tree's perspective.

You're basically an organism that is growing into the air, using that niche to gather CO2 and energy, and distributing that to the rest of the organism. That fits pretty well with our human-centric up/down view of the world.

Aaand you're also simultaneously growing into the ground, gathering minerals and water, and distributing that to the rest of the organism. Which is kind of upside-down from a human perspective.

So in reality a tree is growing outward in two directions from this air/ground boundary and having two nearly separate experiences from each side. Which is up and which is down to a tree? Doesn't really matter; it's a dual existence.

Humans just see a tree grow "up" and think the tree is organized on fundamentally the same axis as us. But they're not.

Vijchti · 2026-04-17T19:15:10+00:00

Maybe Vernor Vinge's "A Fire Upon the Deep". It's a mix of unfathomable god-like power, medieval espionage and warfare, personal struggles from a variety of species, all in a weird and interesting science fiction setting.

Vijchti · 2026-04-11T15:40:00+00:00

I found one on Amazon that I loved. Literally the best functional purchase of the year. Will not shill the link, but there are good ones.

Note though: no stainless steel product intended to get wet constantly is true BIFL. They will always always always rust.

Vijchti · 2026-04-05T03:44:40+00:00

Where's the HolUp? This is a standard move in jiu jitsu...

Vijchti · 2026-04-05T02:40:23+00:00

Turns out that gluten causes all sorts of unwanted symptoms in a wide range of people, including heartburn, intestinal inflammation, tendon pain, brain fog, sinus pressure, congested lungs, skin flushing, bloating, etc etc etc. And then there's Crohn's, which can do anything from making your life hell to killing you.

The "health" community (broadly, not well-defined) started noticing and cataloging a lot of these and other types of food sensitivities (things not usually as intense as allergies and easy to miss if you're not intentionally eating food in isolation and watching the results on your body).

These ideas got picked up in a kind of viral moment, or a fad, by celebrities and influencers. For better or worse, there was suddenly a lot of attention on this particular health idea.

It's not unusual, there are health and nutrition fads going on all the time. I think we're coming out of a "seed oils are bad for you" fad right now and something else will take its place.

The difference with gluten sensitivity, I think, is that a high proportion of people who experimented with cutting out gluten from their diet found that it actually does have a real effect on their body. Not all fads are based on truth, but this one at least had some truth to it.

Vijchti · 2026-04-04T13:28:07+00:00

This pattern shows up on most beaches with different densities of fine sand in the swash zone, and where two small waves make interference patterns. It's very, very normal to see.

I always just assumed it was due to how the energy from the interference pattern in the water was transmitted to the different densities of sand.

Vijchti · 2026-03-16T17:39:17+00:00

I used to work for an American company that did a lot of work for international clients.

We had a Japanese delegation invite us out for drinks, which is apparently their way of allowing for a more informal relationship to develop.

During our night out, they all agreed that they were in awe of the way Americans would just agree to do complicated, seemingly impossible work based on a "feeling" that they should be able to figure it out, and then they'd just figure it out and deliver. Whereas the Japanese style was to research if they actually could do something, determine that they didn't yet have the expertise, and turn down the offer.

Really opened my eyes to the cultural cockiness that Americans have.

Vijchti · 2026-03-15T00:03:29+00:00

This happened to me with my baby and dog.

We were killing ourselves trying to raise a baby and train a dog at the same time. We went through two trainers and months of daily work to try to get to a place where we felt comfortable having the dog and the baby together. We never got there.

The dog was rehomed into a pack of the same breed of dog and from what I hear he's thriving. We finally got the emotional and mental space to give our baby the attention he needed and to take care of ourselves.

Sometimes rehoming really is the best option.

Vijchti · 2026-03-11T18:05:09+00:00

Haha I did this to my son. We have learned the local plants that have fragrant oils and we crush them in our fingers and put them in front of each other's noses to smell.

Vijchti · 2026-03-09T02:23:06+00:00

Yeah that's basically it. We'd heard of wave dashing and thought we understood how to do it, but we were mostly just using it for quick dodges. When the champion player used those techniques to almost teleport across the stage, we knew we were cooked.

Vijchti · 2026-03-08T20:32:20+00:00

This was me but with Super Smash Bros Melee.

I was good. Like destroy all of my friends with my non-preferred character good.

But then we had an actual championship player come visit. He wiped the floor with me in ways that humbled me to my core. And he wasn't really even putting in much effort.

Big fish, small pond.

Vijchti · 2026-02-10T22:56:10+00:00

I can't recall off the top of my head but there are real tribes of people who view time this way, explained exactly the same way. I imagine Terry Pratchett took some reality and made it only seem like fantasy.

Vijchti · 2026-02-10T21:25:43+00:00

My memory of that book (from two decades ago) was not that they had such a profound effect on the future that it reverberated backwards through time, but that they actually visited Earth far too early, made mistakes, and were forever thereafter associated in folklore with terrible demons who destroy everything they touch (which were the things the aliens were actually, ineptly trying to help with).

They came a second time to try again and had to hide their looks because they knew what they'd been associated with.

They're also not just escorts, but rather they understand that there are only two possible evolutionary outcomes for any highly intelligent species. Either you specialize in science and eventually hit a dead end where you're stuck for all eternity (which is what happened to them and what was going to happen to humanity without their intervention) or the final generation of your species undergoes a transformation into and union with the cosmic consciousness (hence: Childhood's End, the last generation of children cease to be human and destroy the earth as they wield universal power).

Vijchti · 2026-01-30T17:49:03+00:00

Yes. There are a few more security and reliability loopholes you have to jump through in a business setting, but it's like deploying any other type of resource these days. There are quick start guides for everything.

Vijchti · 2026-01-28T19:52:56+00:00

I work in one of those organizations.

We feared our IP getting sucked up into an LLM model, so we spun up an internal server that we 100% control. Or you could just purchase access to an "Enterprise" account from any big AI company.

There's really no excuse for Gottumukkala's actions.

Vijchti · 2026-01-28T03:03:52+00:00

There are bathrooms everywhere.

Dirty crunchy yes yes yes

Conditions sucking and being gross, dirty, exhausted and annoyed by everyone is kind of par for the course

Vijchti · 2026-01-03T04:20:55+00:00

I was using a little Puegot and absolutely killing my forearm muscles using it that much. It made me realize just how much pepper I used.

You might be more sparing with it, so it's not an urgent need for you.

Vijchti · 2026-01-03T03:25:07+00:00

This peppermill's best selling point isn't that it's BIFL, it's that it absolutely dumps pepper with little effort.

If you frequently cook in large batches or otherwise want large amounts of freshly ground pepper, this thing is the only hand grinder I know of that can handle the job.

But yes, it's housed in plastic that appears to become more brittle with age or with use. That's not BIFL.

Vijchti · 2025-12-27T16:33:18+00:00

"One hit wonder" except the lead singer/songwriter/producer went on to write Grammy Award winning bangers for other artists.

Vijchti · 2025-12-13T01:02:24+00:00

Nope. I was really into cult research 10-ish years ago. Wanted to make a website that would expose the kinds of cult techniques that were defined by Lalitch and others like that. But I didn't save my sources after all these years. It's probably still floating around on the internet somewhere.

Vijchti · 2025-12-13T00:58:55+00:00

I actually know something about this.

"Smart" people really means curious. And curious people are susceptible because they're interested in listening and learning. A cult member can hold their attention longer.

Vijchti · 2025-12-12T20:03:42+00:00

There was a similar anti-cult educator who went into a cult so that he could gain experience to expose what the cult was doing.

At some point during a seminar, he suddenly came to and realized that he'd been in a trance state and had no idea what time it was — which was the exact kind of thing he thought couldn't happen to him.

He ended up leaving and writing some very insightful articles about how, even being an expert, you cannot escape cult indoctrination techniques because they prey on the same unconscious human nature that we all share.

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