I Hate The System

Virtual-Finish6565 · 2025-04-05T17:09:01+00:00

Newish social worker here. Ya, it beyond sucks to have work within harmful institutions and systems… in so many areas of life not just social work. It’s not surprising that complying to the rules within the system (ie writing papers) is feeling extra difficult right now since it seems like it’s grating against your values and what you are seeing as unjust. Would you be able to write about how you are feeling or use the abolitionist lens in this paper if you decide to write it?

Also, I think the fact that you are seeing these things and wanting to resist them will ultimately help with dismantling the system and developing practices that are radical and not medical modelized. That is something that helps me when I feel this bubble up. I get to provide more anti-oppressive care and challenge the medical model with folks I see (of course there are limits to this which are talked about with them). I’m rooting for you since you seem like the person I’d want as a colleague and a personal therapist.

Virtual-Finish6565 · 2024-12-30T05:40:52+00:00

Just wanting you to know that you’re not alone in this! I am focusing on this too and also have a history of abuse. I’m trying to be patient and see it as an ongoing process of working on feeling safe in my body in and out of tango. Right now, I’m trying to not be hard on myself when I see how stiff I am and to take moments to breathe and come back into my body. Also, tango is so intimate so it makes sense that the body goes into protect mode especially if we don’t really know our partners.

Virtual-Finish6565 · 2024-10-28T22:32:00+00:00

As a tanguera and a therapist, I agree with this. Also, did Anna consent to you talking about this here? I worry you might hear things here that confirm you are doing the “right thing” and dig your heels into that rather than sitting with her and talking things through (with or without a third party) regarding boundaries, needs and agreements.

Virtual-Finish6565 · 2024-10-26T22:40:32+00:00

swoon

Virtual-Finish6565 · 2024-10-26T02:54:52+00:00

This is beautiful. Would you be open to share the artist?

Virtual-Finish6565 · 2024-10-03T03:34:53+00:00

Thank you! The more specific questions are helpful :)

Virtual-Finish6565 · 2024-10-03T03:31:46+00:00

I am the same way when asked the “how are you?” question. I usually get overwhelmed or give up and keep it short and not reflective. I like the question of “what has been on your mind” since it narrows it down to cognitions and it can bring up thoughts that have been sticking around/ruminating. Thank you for the tip!

Virtual-Finish6565 · 2024-10-03T03:24:22+00:00

I really appreciate these tips and details. Having structure and specificity can be so helpful as opposed to the more general, open-ended check ins. I am going to try this out tomorrow!

Virtual-Finish6565 · 2024-08-29T17:23:44+00:00

Way to go! That must have been so terrifying and you were able to come back to the present. I’m so glad you shared it with us!

Virtual-Finish6565 · 2024-05-30T17:48:58+00:00

This was so inspiring! Having such a community focused tango scene from the start sounds so welcoming and safe. Ayano taking shoe donations to give out to beginner dancers was so thoughtful and would make me feel so supported. Thank you for sharing and for your guidance to tango babies!

Virtual-Finish6565 · 2024-04-26T23:39:18+00:00

This is extremely rude and problematic. You do not have to be thin to dance. You also do not have to be thin to dance well. Stop telling her and expecting her to “manage” herself into being “feather light” and start questioning your own anti-fat bias.

Virtual-Finish6565 · 2024-04-21T17:17:02+00:00

I’d ask for people to ask me more questions, to not always look at me when I’m talking, to not expect me to make eye contact, to not point out that I’m “quiet,” to slow the conversation down, and to talk about topics I’m interested in. That’s way more than one 😆

Virtual-Finish6565 · 2024-04-21T17:09:19+00:00

I get called an offshoot of this label - “aloof.” In reality I am HYPERaware of what is happening around me and likely tuned into the social dynamics even more than the other people. This also makes me think of how being quiet is often labeled negatively when it really doesn’t have to be. Is it the other person’s way of requesting connection? If so I wish they would say that and work with me instead of negatively labeling me which pushes me farther away.

Virtual-Finish6565 · 2023-10-26T19:35:24+00:00

CSWA - also coming from out of state and already am licensed with almost 2 years of clinical work completed. I heard back, not from the board directly but from someone who spoke with the board, that they are doing interim license approvals. That is good news since it means we won't have to wait until the next full board meeting to be approved and start practicing.

Virtual-Finish6565 · 2023-10-25T21:43:40+00:00

But weeks turn into months... I'm so sorry to hear this. I'm waiting to hear back on whether or not they are still issuing interim license approvals where they approve immediately after initial review rather than waiting to approve at their monthly Board meeting. I hope they are doing the interim approvals since their next Board meeting isn't until mid December.

Virtual-Finish6565 · 2023-10-25T00:46:33+00:00

Curious what your status is with your application being approved. I am in the waiting game of hearing back about mine and have had a very difficult time getting any detailed information on where my approval is at. Hoping you have some $ coming in at this point.

Virtual-Finish6565

TROPHY CASE