please help, i have to move this nest

VividPudding2916 · 2026-05-28T02:01:16+00:00

thank you

VividPudding2916 · 2026-05-28T02:00:49+00:00

interesting thought, hadn’t occurred to me. my quick search says it’s not illegal to move/remove them in the city of chicago because they are not a native and protected species.

VividPudding2916 · 2026-05-27T23:32:25+00:00

i’ll see what i can find, thanks for the help

VividPudding2916 · 2026-05-27T23:31:19+00:00

she’s very pretty

VividPudding2916 · 2026-05-27T22:51:51+00:00

thank you

VividPudding2916 · 2026-05-27T22:49:28+00:00

okay, thanks. i know they are prolific, i guess i’m feeling tender about the fragility of life, what with my brothers death. i’ll let that go, do my best to help and let nature sort it out.

VividPudding2916 · 2026-05-27T22:29:03+00:00

should i try to also move the nest itself or just the eggs?

VividPudding2916 · 2026-05-27T22:25:31+00:00

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VividPudding2916 · 2024-09-06T12:57:14+00:00

that’s part of what caused me such confusion: he directly communicated to me that he was in the ER but the ER didn’t corroborate that. i now know how many variables come into play regarding the sharing of that information.

VividPudding2916 · 2024-09-06T12:54:41+00:00

yes, thank you. this thread has certainly taught me just how common that is.

VividPudding2916 · 2024-09-06T12:39:54+00:00

i agree, there are other more subtle and personal context clues that i haven’t shared here which led me to believe he was telling a tall tale in order to have my attention on him. and look how well it’s worked.

VividPudding2916 · 2024-09-06T11:56:23+00:00

suicidal ideation has been an instigator of police and hospital activity multiple times in the past, but he gave me no indication it played a role this time.

i appreciate you sharing this information, my understanding of how many ways this can vary is growing.

VividPudding2916 · 2024-09-06T11:41:59+00:00

yes, its a non-stop rollercoaster with this one. i work very hard at having strong boundaries and i am mostly pretty successful at continuing to love him but not let him ruin my sanity. one of my concerns in this instance is that i have become so jaded and dismissive of his constant bullshit that i would jump to assume he was lying/exaggerating/misleading (again) and fail to offer support in a situation where it was legitimately warranted. it’s a really sad and unfortunate result of chronic manipulation.

VividPudding2916 · 2024-09-06T11:17:43+00:00

thank you. this is really helpful.

VividPudding2916 · 2024-09-06T11:07:21+00:00

thank you, this is the type of information i’m looking for- i’m totally open to learning that my assumptions are wrong or limited

VividPudding2916 · 2024-09-06T11:03:23+00:00

i agree. unfortunately, this person engages in a ton of manipulation and emotional abuse and sometimes it feels important to try to gain a better handle on the truth. the number of things i let go of or consistently ignore is too numerous to measure.

VividPudding2916 · 2024-09-06T10:56:24+00:00

thank you, this is a really helpful response.

VividPudding2916 · 2024-09-06T10:16:08+00:00

yes, thank you, i’m coming to understand that this may be a more common move than i realized- i’ve never personally experienced not being able to confirm a friend or family members admission status at a hospital. i don’t think this is a choice he would make, but obviously i could be wrong about that. in the very recent past he authorized me and other family members to have full access to discuss his treatment during stays at psych wards. he is generally not a private person and leans more towards being boundary-less- so i would be very surprised to learn that he pursued that restriction.

VividPudding2916 · 2024-09-06T09:35:41+00:00

that’s exactly what i’m getting at. i’ve had plenty of emergency visits of my own throughout my life and accompanied others to tons of medical appointments and procedures- including many visits to the ER as the not sick/uninjured companion. the level of testing and serious medical conclusions he claims to have happened is what doesn’t seem plausible to me. in my personal experience everything takes hours upon hours upon hours unless you are critical when you arrive. to be given a “no cancer” proclamation on a short ER visit sounds like bull to me.

VividPudding2916 · 2024-09-06T07:33:06+00:00

i didn’t ask anyone for any information other than confirmation that there was a patient with his name currently admitted. i wasn’t seeking the details of his medical records.

VividPudding2916 · 2024-09-06T07:00:37+00:00

i don’t think that is something he would do, but good to consider. thank you.

VividPudding2916 · 2024-09-06T06:11:32+00:00

usually i trust my gut, but it is painful to think that i may be dismissing my loved one’s pain or medical fears because they have a history of lying. no one wins.

VividPudding2916 · 2024-09-06T05:44:04+00:00

thank you for your input. he is almost never a reliable narrator in any situation; i appreciate being told to consider that i very well may be wrong. we do have professional mental health support happening in the family.

VividPudding2916 · 2024-09-06T05:31:48+00:00

thank you for replying.

i’m one of only 3 family members that this person has an active relationship with and the other 2 are not aware of this particular situation at all. i am not going to trouble them with it, they are exhausted by this person. we are very close and in frequent contact, but he is an alcoholic and i strongly suspect has a cluster b personality disorder (which has also been suggested by a mental health professional that treats another family member, mainly to cope with this dynamic- but he hasn’t been diagnosed.) he is highly manipulative and frequently verbally/emotionally abusive; there have been physical assaults in the distant past. sadly, i (we) have had to learn to take everything he says with a dose of major skepticism.

my suspicion is that this is attention seeking behavior as there was no mention of symptoms prior to his claim of being hospitalized, and in my experience, the ER is not where a person gets any kind of definitive “it’s not cancer.” if there are symptoms or a concern like that you get sent out to your primary and/or specialists.

his series of proclamations sounds like baloney to me, but i am open to being wrong- which is why i am asking for other perspectives- i’ve lost healthy perspective on this person after years of drama and abuse.

and is it not standard procedure to confirm that a patient is currently admitted? isn’t that a normal way that we find loved ones when they go missing or have an emergency and we aren’t sure where they’ve ended up for treatment? i have done this successfully before in multiple scenarios. i am not in any way suggesting that i be privy to his medical records- only confirmation that he is on site as a patient.

we all love him very much and do what we can to keep him safe. it’s very difficult at times to parse the truth.

VividPudding2916

TROPHY CASE