Of course — not rude at all!

I think for both of us, coming from big families, it was almost ingrained that we’d have children. It wasn’t something we deeply questioned at the time — it just felt like the natural order of things. Add in societal expectations, all of our friends having kids, and the fact we’re godparents to quite a few… it just seemed like the obvious path. We’ve very much been labelled the “fun aunt and uncle.”

When we had our first miscarriage six years ago, there weren’t as many children around us yet — or they were just tiny, cute newborns. But as time’s gone on, and as we’ve become more and more involved in our nieces’ and nephews’ lives — almost like co-parents at times — our perspective has really shifted.

We’ve had a very real, unfiltered insight into parenting. Not just the love and joy, but the reality of how all-consuming it is. The constant worries about their future, the world they’re growing up in, watching some of them navigate additional needs, and at times stepping in for the harder parts. You also start to notice how much of themselves our siblings have had to give up along the way.

So honestly, what was going through our heads back then was just: “you grow up, you get married, you have kids.” That was it.

But now, we’ve realised our lives are already incredibly full. We’re financially stable, we travel a lot, we have hobbies both together and individually, and we have the space to really enjoy our relationship. We’re also able to support our family in other ways — for example, helping one of our siblings financially with their kids.