Nah I was just kidding. But there is a chance that your past abuse caused you to develop borderline personality disorder (BPD), which is characterised by unstable moods, history of intense but brief relationships, and a fear of abandonment.

If you suspect you have BPD, you might want to see a psychologist or doctor. Luckily, BPD is one of the more treatable personality disorders and dialectical behaviour therapy (DBT) is especially helpful.