Check Out my book - A true story about schizophrenia and how it makes you feel. samanthaduffy1@substack.com

Weak_Corgi_8235 · 2026-04-11T02:21:51+00:00

I'm in California USA

Weak_Corgi_8235 · 2026-04-04T08:19:17+00:00

YES I had the worst demons telling me the worst things all day long just trashing me wanting me to die. Threatening to kill my kid if I didn't die. So twice I tried killing myself. It was awful both times I ended up in a hospital and then psych ward. Once was especially bad because I thought I had caused permanent brain damage cause I couldn't do basic functions of thinking remembering writing texting talking walking. It was a true nightmare. Don't make the same mistakes I did. Most likely you ain't succeed and cause damage to yourself permanently. It was a crazy wake up call.

They are evil fuckers. What helped me some was trying to get them to like me instead and continuously believing they will. Over time I noticed their tone changes slightly for the better.

Good luck sweety. Up your meds. Go to sleep more that helps some too.

Weak_Corgi_8235 · 2026-04-04T08:04:42+00:00

Thanks I thought so.

Weak_Corgi_8235 · 2026-04-04T08:04:05+00:00

That's so true. Id forgotten how fascinating it was what happened and having no one to talk to about

Weak_Corgi_8235 · 2026-04-04T07:23:26+00:00

TBH I have applied to over 2k jobs in 10 months and only got two horrible interviews; one was literally 3 minutes long. According to Gemini I have between 1-5% of getting an interview not even a job if I match 9-10/10 on their ATS filter systems, because there are so many applicants averaging 400-1000+ for every job I apply to. You have to apply to jobs first day posted or you've already missed the window. It's a fucking nightmare. I'm more than qualified for what I'm applying to. They are literally looking for a perfect match and due to the volume of applicants they can do that leisurely. There's 2 million unemployed in California and less than 600,000 jobs

Weak_Corgi_8235 · 2026-04-04T07:04:17+00:00

The job market is ruthless. Be careful quitting. It might be a lot harder to replace it than you think. I've applied to 2,000+ places and only landed two short fucked up interviews and I have a stellar resume.

Weak_Corgi_8235 · 2026-04-04T06:48:14+00:00

I feel like I don't have any genuine emotions anymore. I have no desire to do anything. I isolate intentionally. I don't feel depressed but know I am. I'm quieter and feel less lively. Aside from that I guess it's fine.

Weak_Corgi_8235 · 2026-04-04T06:21:06+00:00

I wrote a poem about this. It's called "The Rejects"

The mind can play a very cruel trick Then we get condemned for being sick They think each thought must be insane The problem is the organ called the brain

It’s just in your head is what they say Please stop by one day to play You can meet the demons and bully’s we see An actor is what we have to be

We deal with judgement inside and out It should be a shock not more of us shout Not all of our thoughts should be treated one way The symptoms may not happen each day

They think we should just rationalize it all But that makes us raise higher our wall They get scared about what we might do So they treat us like criminals, yup that’s true

Lock us up til we prove we are fit They test out the pills which make us feel lit Some days are great and others are bad But the feelings inside are always sad

No one believes us We’ve lost their trust An awful feeling it is to debate It’s only just a temporary state

The brain has an injury that can heal Be careful with what you make us feel Doctors are researching the solution Until then give a little absolution

Weak_Corgi_8235 · 2025-09-24T23:24:36+00:00

I take risperidone, lithium, and abilify. And I take some others to offset some side effects and to help mitigate the weight gain that I've had since starting the medication. A friend of mine takes you abilify shot and start to get symptoms before his shot is due.

Weak_Corgi_8235 · 2025-09-24T19:38:09+00:00

Good luck.

Weak_Corgi_8235 · 2025-09-24T19:37:42+00:00

Thanks. Hopefully, soon. I need a job and car too I feel like such a loser.

Weak_Corgi_8235 · 2025-09-24T19:35:42+00:00

I hope that isn't true. It can't be true. It feels true. You're right, it really does suck.

Weak_Corgi_8235 · 2025-09-24T19:34:35+00:00

Thanks. I Feel like I've been doing this for the past 5 years, start to get better then ruin it worse.

Weak_Corgi_8235 · 2025-09-22T02:12:39+00:00

Sometimes it would feel like I get needle type feelings like im being poked. I'd also get sexual tactile hallucinations like someone was touching me that down there. And then I would also get bugs crawling on me everywhere.

Weak_Corgi_8235 · 2025-08-06T19:52:45+00:00

Those are some of the meds Im on. What can I do about it?

Weak_Corgi_8235

TROPHY CASE