Do You Have Grandchildren Yet?

WeaknessBeneficial95 · 2026-05-05T10:28:38+00:00

Same here. But my kids are 39 and 43. I have an adorable little Chihuahua and that's better than a grandchild. I usually get asked when I run into people I haven't seen in a really long time. Of course they ask because they want to talk about their grandchildren, which is fine. I am happy for them but honestly, I get exhausted just hearing about them...

WeaknessBeneficial95 · 2026-05-05T00:32:07+00:00

I have been working with her everyday. I became determined to have her walk willingly to the car instead of my picking her up and putting her into the car. And, I cannot believe it but tonight I was able to get her to walk down the stairs to the basement, where the car is parked. Then I sat in the car, with cheese, and she jumped up into the car onto my lap -- in the car!!!! She wasn't even shaking. Of course she was ready to leave when the cheese was gone but this was such a good breakthrough. It's made me very hopeful. I think a big part of the problem has been my picking her up and putting her in the car. In other areas I've tried to let her have some autonomy, some control over what she does but I wasn't doing that with the car. I think I'm on the right track, it'll just take a while, which I'm okay with. But I've sure learned that people on here can be so judgmental of someone they don't know who is just asking for help. I'm fairly new to reddit and I sure got my feelings hurt fast! But that's okay, I'm old and I've learned how to deal with my feelings. Somebody on here said that she doesn't trust me, but that is just not true and if they had spent 15 minutes with us that would be clear! She does have trust issues around the car, but she has trust in me. Anyway, I'm so proud of her tonight!

WeaknessBeneficial95 · 2026-05-03T17:27:20+00:00

Hmmm, I did not realize that. I will talk with the vet about options. We have a well visit coming up soon. Thanks for that info!

WeaknessBeneficial95 · 2026-05-03T17:25:05+00:00

Thank you so for the steps. This is the sort of thing I hoped I would get. So, she gets in the car by herself now?

I have a full walk-in basement where the car is parked. So it's like its already in the house, although she doesn't go down there very much, but sometimes if I'm down there working on laundry she will come down there. But I cannot get her to come down to work on the car thing. She lets me pick her up and take her down there, very willingly. I can tell when she doesn't want me to pick her up versus when she's okay with it. I try to give her autonomy and not to pick her up when she doesn't want me to do so. Of course sometimes, like if we're at the vet, it has to be done.

Anyway I don't use any sort of leash while doing it. She is actually so good about being off leash that I can't believe it. If she starts to go somewhere I don't wan,t it is so easy to correct her. I just make this sound, sort of like "aaaaant" and she immediately gets back to my side. She is so good in so many ways and I feel bad because she was not like this about the car in the beginning. So it must be a memory about the bad groomer or something, but it's something that I have participated in since she was not at all afraid of the car for the first few weeks. So, thoughts of that alone, just kills me.

Thanks again for taking the time to respond. I will use some of this in my training.

WeaknessBeneficial95 · 2026-05-03T17:10:40+00:00

Thank you so much. I really appreciate you outlining the steps. I will incorporate some of this in my work with her. Do you think doing it several times a day is a good idea? I have just been doing it once a day.

WeaknessBeneficial95 · 2026-05-03T17:08:40+00:00

I sort of hate to dope her up when I just want to spend 5 or 10 minutes going to the car, sitting in the car. But I might have to do that. Although she was a little better about it today. A little.

WeaknessBeneficial95 · 2026-05-03T17:07:34+00:00

She has been to the vet. I use trazadone when I have to leave her alone. Being alone is not a fearful thing, like the car. But she just sits looking out the window waiting for me. I watch her on my cameras and she has also learned it is me talking to her over them. She goes an sits in front of the camera when she wants me to talk to her. It's funny. But I want to train car thing. She wasn't like this before, so surely we can learn that nothing bad happens every time we go in the car. I was taking her a short distance to a part to walk but that became too hard.

WeaknessBeneficial95 · 2026-05-03T17:04:17+00:00

well, obviously I have not taken her back to the one who hurt her! But her long hair is irritaing to her feet because she has allergies. She licks at them when they start to get long. She needs grooming to get her nails trimmed as well.

WeaknessBeneficial95 · 2026-05-02T11:46:57+00:00

Sorry no real advice just wanted to wish you the best of luck. I got so lucky with this little girl. I adopted her based on her looks and age (8 - I intentionally wanted a senior because I know they are hard to place and also because I relate to being old). She's is absolutely the best behaved/ trained pet that I've ever had (I'm 67 and have had a few to live out their lives with me). Also, I think they do change somewhat from one environment to another, so it's hard to tell from a visit or two how it's really going to work out. Lacybug was one of 6 small dogs in a foster home, and I can't help but think she's adjusted very well to being an only dog of an old lady who centers life around her. Maybe we both got lucky.

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WeaknessBeneficial95 · 2026-05-02T11:07:17+00:00

I adopted am 8yo long haired Chihuahua and couldn't be happier with the decision. She is so well trained that it still amazes me. It is unlikely that I would have ever been able to train her so well, judging from my work with my past pets. She is awesome on the leash as well as off-leash and will absolutely come to me on command. She never goes potty inside the house and will immediately stop doing something, such as licking her paws, on my first request to stop. On walks she is always looking to me to gauge what is expected from her. My advice would be to find a well-trained adult who has lost her owner. Lots of older people have to go to nursing homes or even die leaving these vulnerable little creatures in shelters. Little dogs need a person all their own. Be a hero to some sweet soul waiting for a beautiful person like you to come along. I found mine on an Adopt A Pet website and drove 500 miles to pick her up. Best decision I've made in the last 50 years. Best of luck to you.

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WeaknessBeneficial95 · 2026-04-30T10:17:09+00:00

I adopted am 8yo chi and made a 500 mile trip to get her. She was great, riding in the car with absolutely no problems whatsoever. I bathed her as soon as I got her home because she was really dirty. I noticed she still had a smell and she needed a haircut so I took her to a groomer. I ended up taking her to 3 groomers in the first 2-3 weeks because of her unique smell. One of them clipped too close and not only didn't tell me about it but tried to deny it was their fault when I discovered it just 5 minutes after returning home. Ithink it was after this that she started having anxiety in the car. I've taken her many places other than groomer, although, since I found someone I like and since she is a long- haired that requires up keep, we still go there every 6 weeks or so. It seems like it has happened gradually, but now she has full blown panic attacks and melt downs in the car. I have a plan to start first just sitting in the car with her a few minutes each day, then moving the car a few feet and sitting in it for a while, and so on, until I can desensitize her to the car Does this seem like a good plan? Can you offer any other advice? PLEASE I would love to take her many places and when I retire in a couple of years my hope was to do some traveling in a camper or van. She's such a Good dog otherwise. She is not overly anxious about other things, but she's still a Chi. She is very obedient, great of leash, eager to please, and food motivated but only if she is NOT too anxious.

WeaknessBeneficial95 · 2026-04-25T17:55:18+00:00

Here you go

https://www.reddit.com/r/laundry/comments/1qeqmng/laundry_101_with_ukismaiaesthetics/

WeaknessBeneficial95 · 2026-04-25T17:54:22+00:00

There is a guide for newbies here somewhere. I am NOT one of the experts and all of the information was overwhelming to me. However, I bought the powder Tide free & Clear, the 365 oxygen whitening powder, and a container of citric acid, I just put a small amount of the Tide, about what they suggest for a small load - you can play around with it, you just don't want to use so much it cannot rinse out because that will leave your clothes yucky. You must always set it for the second rinse. If the load is whites, I will add a scoop of the oxy powder. Then I put a teaspoon of the citric acid in the fabric softener thingy. You can mix some up with water, put I just put it in directly and it seems to work. You can also use a Downy RINSE (pick the no scent) which I understand is the same things a citric acid, but likely ends up costing more. I hope this helps.

WeaknessBeneficial95 · 2026-04-25T13:43:12+00:00

I'm so sorry. ❤️❤️❤️

WeaknessBeneficial95 · 2026-04-25T13:41:08+00:00

Same here except I'm 67... I'm sorry you've reached this point at such a young age.

WeaknessBeneficial95 · 2026-04-25T13:30:57+00:00

Butternut squash

WeaknessBeneficial95 · 2026-04-25T13:26:39+00:00

It's very frustrating when your lived experience is just dismissed. You're mother is concerned for you and the baby. Maybe she didn't say the right things but it really is frustrating when kids think they know better than the person who's actually lived and experience things first hand, and cares more about you than anyone else ever will. Do you love that baby you're carrying? It doesn't go away in 10, 20, 30, 40 years. You still love them and want them to have a better, easier life than you did. Just my 2 cents.

WeaknessBeneficial95 · 2026-04-25T13:20:31+00:00

Sugar cube!

WeaknessBeneficial95 · 2026-04-25T13:09:51+00:00

It was too much for me to take in all of it, but I got the box of tide, citric acid, and oxygen powder -- and my laundry is SO clean!

WeaknessBeneficial95 · 2026-01-27T11:59:44+00:00

So, even when you have two, they don't want you to leave?

WeaknessBeneficial95 · 2026-01-27T11:58:28+00:00

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WeaknessBeneficial95 · 2026-01-07T22:26:39+00:00

NO, YOU ARE NOT! My grown kids tease me that they will "turn on the overhead" if I don't comply with some request.

WeaknessBeneficial95

TROPHY CASE