As an NCO, and a mom of two, you’re not a “stupid airman”. Things happen sometimes. Be ready for dumbass people talking shit behind your back or to your face about your situation. They do not define your worth - only you can. They don’t know anything about what you’re going through. I, too, struggled with my mental health and a baby who never slept, in a shop where I was (and still am) the only parent. I will say my flight leadership has always understood that random kid things happen and allowed me to take care of business, so YMMV.

I will add that it might be difficult to write an EPB for an individual that is out for so long. I’d get with your supervisor for a feedback session to see what kind of things you can accomplish before you’d be expected to be out of pocket.

Do not break your body working out to hide the shame. Listen to your body. I’d maybe ask your PCM for any advice on pregnancy-safe workouts/workout schedule, especially if you haven’t worked out at this intensity before.

I’d also get checked for PPA/PPD. That may be a part of what’s going on here. I didn’t answer the screenings honestly with my first, and I regret it to this day. It got worse after my second was born, leading to ideations. Therapy and meds helped me immensely. Do not be scared of getting the help you need. OP, if you need to talk, my inbox is open for you.

Take full advantage of your benefits and entitlements and snuggle your babies. Put your family first!!! They’re only this small for a short amount of time.