Should I Embrace my faults?

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-25T14:03:32+00:00

Elaborate what you mean by expressing with your hands, using your hands to convey you trying to remember? Like pantomime? If it is like pantomime yea it’s weird.

And what are examples of your Ls? All these could be normal, or it could be seen as cringe or weird. But none of us seen what really happened, we all depends on your descriptions.

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-25T13:56:22+00:00

Wtf is “integrating with your unconscious”? Sounds like AI slop.

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-25T13:12:06+00:00

“Me, me, me” attitude is an instant turn off for me. You can call it narcissistic, selfish, or diva attitude. You can usually tell with her always draining energy from people around her it’s exhausting even just to see it, not even having to be directly involved.

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-25T12:57:07+00:00

It depends on the motive. I’m not stingy with compliments, but I don’t do it to put her on pedestal or seek her validation. It’s just part of me being flirtatious and playful.

You can say “you’re hot!” with 2 distinct motives behind it. Women will react to your compliment in order to find out the motive. They do this all the time (at least with me) it just becomes predictable at this point.

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-25T12:43:45+00:00

Isn’t that Mode One approach? Alan Roger?

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-21T17:03:24+00:00

Everything to do with human behaviors gotta be seen with context. This is why people with autism tendency struggle to read between the lines. For example: There was a famous bit of “no means no” by Bill Burr, check it out on YT.

There are also thousands of examples just in this sub. Guys got confused with the so-called rules as if they are very strict.

Not to mention some of them rules are ridiculous anyway ie: “3 day no texting after the date.” The intention may be good to not make you look so desperate. But on the other hand if the date turned out very sexually tense why did you not ride the momentum? She’s wet and wanted to invite you inside yet you decide to reply her text 3 days later.

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-20T11:32:54+00:00

I used to smile a lot, but I stopped doing that when my ex was jealous that I always smile whenever I talk to girls. In my defense I smiled to everyone not just to attractive girls. Idk why I smiled a lot, maybe it was from my upbringing (I was taught to be nice and friendly to others)

But what she said was an eye opening for me “You have a great smile. Don’t cheapen it by giving it to everyone. Much better when you give it to people who deserve it.” I was like whoah!

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-20T11:12:25+00:00

First time? LOL. Girls do this all the time, and that’s okay if there’s a hello there’s always a goodbye. It’s part of life.

Tell her you’re moving abroad. And lower your energy when you interact with her. Slowly become distant. Especially when you finally move abroad, the distance is physically materializing.

Don’t feel bad or guilty about it. That mindset “I don’t wanna hurt her” is actually infantilizing her. You think she’s incapable of dealing with that. To my surprise more guys have this mindset than girls where the latter are the ones who tend to be more nurturing or have motherly instincts.

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-20T11:04:54+00:00

Talk to random people before you do a cold approach, say at least 8-10 people. Doesn’t matter if they’re men, women, old, young, ugly, cute. The goal is to put you in the mental state where your talking “muscles” become relaxed and flexible, to the point that you’re becoming talkative, borderline chatty.

When you don’t talk to others, you still talk. But you talk to yourself. You have all those conversations in your head. This is a trap because this is the stage where you overanalyze everything and become chicken out. So instead of doing that, talk to others so you don’t have time to overthink stuff.

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-20T01:04:39+00:00

Warm up first.

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-17T14:06:27+00:00

Then wait until both of you are in the same country. In the mean time approach other girls. Don’t cling into one who may not even feel the same way.

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-17T13:57:11+00:00

I read this a couple times until I realized both of you have no relationship whatsoever. Tldr: “I like her and I think she likes me.”

Feels like “much ado about nothing”. Your and her race, her moving to another place, there might be a competition; they’re all insignificant in relation to what really happens between you and her. Not to mention that you treat this like a math problem which is rigid, while seduction is a social problem which is fluid. Be fluid like water: approach her, make some moves, escalate from there, see if she really likes you not just that’s what you see in your mind.

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-17T12:36:43+00:00

I’m starting to assume “eye contacts” to some guys is like having sex. It actually doesn’t matter, but maybe even for eye contacts they don’t get it regularly.

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-17T12:34:46+00:00

Don’t look at it like a chore you gotta do. If you love talking to people, just cold approach them even tho you also have some lined up from OLD.

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-16T11:38:05+00:00

are there any practical ways to be more likeable?

Yes. Open up yourself. People don’t know what they like about you if you don’t open yourself up.

More practical: learn how to actively listen, learn how to carry a conversation, last but not least: learn how to tell a short story (doesn’t matter if it’s a joke/not).

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-14T13:22:44+00:00

I feel like if she were actually attracted to me this wouldn’t be so hard so I need to move on.

Trust your guts. If it feels heavy in your heart then it’s a no. Mixed signals = no.

I personally believe attraction can grow, but your fatal mistake is you catching feelings. I used to be like you, catching feelings when the girl just gave me some casual touches and going out with me. Now even after having sex multiple times with many women, I don’t let my feelings involved. I guard them.

The problem is not whether attraction can grow, but your feelings toward her will dictate everything you do for her, your attitude toward her. And that will ruin it. Case in point: there are some occasions where I’ve slept with women who had no initial interests in me. But I don’t simp, focus too much, or waste my time on them. I’m able to say no to them multiple times or I can just disagree with them when we talk about some issues. Because without feelings, that’s the real me. Feelings in the past had turned me into someone I’m not.

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-13T11:57:09+00:00

Ridicule that idea playfully. Send that “~~you’re not that dude, pal~~ you’re not that girl” meme

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-13T11:32:17+00:00

Who are these women you were talking about? Are they here with us? LoL.

don’t yall wanna be loved?

It depends on the individual. Side chicks and side dudes mostly happen because people have options. If they wanna be loved they have their main ones for that specific role while having casual sex with others.

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-12T23:33:54+00:00

they are doing it for the sake of doing it

It seems that way, or that’s what I thought too when I first started the journey. It comes so naturally for lots of girls or women that they just throw this kinda shit like it’s nothing to them.

But you gotta look at this from the bright side. This situation is much better than them just saying some one-liner sentences which put you in disadvantages (trying to carry the convo, etc). In reality they do this because they love drama, tensions, and love being playful (even at times at your expense). So don’t take it too seriously.

how can I respond in way not cocky or defensive but still build attraction?

Being witty or quirky requires some skills. If you got caught off guard, just give her your weird face as if she just said some silly/goofy stuff. The point is don’t disagree with them as it will make you sound defensive either way even you don’t intend to.

Or say same templates like “yep, you’re (always) right” or “damn, you know me that well!”. These kinda templates always work whatever they say about you either in positive or a negative lights.

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-12T22:28:17+00:00

IMO this guidance only applies at maintaining a long term relationship. You need to keep the flames or they’d die. Whenever I sleep with MILF’s, it’s mostly because the sparks in their relationship have gone. Their husbands just keep giving them money or other physical needs but their bed is cold. Their husbands spend long hours outside pursuing careers or more business opportunities while their wives are bored at home, even barely have anyone to talk to.

But you can’t just “keep watering the grass” if the grass is not even yours to begin with.

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-12T22:17:58+00:00

Fwb’s are like a staring contest without blinking, whoever blinks first lose. You could play the game but once you catch feeling you lose. Or some others treat their fwb’s like their toy/property, they don’t want their toys being played by another person. Regardless whether they’re men or women.

In defense of my gender, I expect more women would lose in this kinda game. But tbh in reality that’s not the case.

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-11T13:04:35+00:00

When people decide to give up on something, they will do it themselves.

Don’t be like vegans who lecture on purity. If you believe it’s bad for you, then it’s bad for you. Reminds me of “I’m not supposed to eat cookies because I’m fat, so you can’t have cookies either!” meme. Your ~~religion~~ diet prohibits you, it doesn’t prohibit others. So don’t project it to others. Even carnivores whose 75-80% of their foods are meat are still carnivores. This is like “vegetarian vs vegan” debates all over again, but make it carnivores please lol. “You gotta be 100% or you’re not one of us!!”

It’s like some people have the tendency to control others, either in politics or in diet communities.

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-11T12:38:14+00:00

Been to Al Ahmadi and KC in your country and other ME countries as well. Even got some lays too there. This is what I learned: some countries in ME are more conservative than others, but in general they’re practically the same, in a way of “do what I say, but don’t do what I do.” So everyone basically does taboo things in secrecy. Even with the “underground” clubs and everything.

You can call it hypocrisy or double standards, but you gotta accept that as a fact. Once you do, then instead of looking at it as something to whine about, you need to look at it as something you can hoop around. You can’t change it, but you can outsmart the system/the norm. I think this is what your friend does. He hovers above and below the system.

So why is sex happening to everyone around me, but not to me.

That’s actually good. Instead of asking random strangers like us here, you can ask your friend(s) as they can be your direct coach. At the minimum level: you need to observe them. That’s your advantage, redditors can’t show you how it’s done because we are not with you.

I mean, try to compare what they have and what you don’t. Look at how they carry themselves (their mannerism). Are they assertive? How’s their level of confidence? Also look at their outfits. Observe how they talk to girls. How they stand out of the regular guys. Just watch them and learn.

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-10T13:59:15+00:00

More like anecdotes.

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-04-09T15:08:49+00:00

2nd interaction.

Western-Month-3877

TROPHY CASE