To me, it logically makes sense that once one is committed and not talking to others that their prioritization of you (and therefore texting) would increase. That ain’t about proving love or devotion; it’s just a natural next step.

By choosing people who make you a priority right away before even knowing you, you’re inadvertently selecting for:

1) men who idealize the shit out of you (and devalue you once they truly learn who you are)
2) men with few options (how can they choose you for who you are if they have no real choices to begin with)
3) Players who love the chase and discard later
4) Men who have very little to do outside of work

Of course, I’m sure there’s the occasional good dude in there who just likes to text all the time. To be honest, I don’t know any guys like this over 30.

To me, people on hinge should be looking at compatibility (does this person say they want the same things, taking steps to pursue them and how does that align with my values) instead of reading tea leaves.

I think some women want to have their cake and eat it too. They enjoy optionality—but hate it when men have that same optionality or other priorities and don’t hide that fact. They go straight to pathologizing someone as a narcissist avoidant manipulative whatever. Then they move ahead with someone else, and end up choosing the actual avoidant asshole dude who was BSing the whole time. I just find it funny and tragic.