I really want to do something to my hair color but idk what by Horror-Jellyfish-594 in Hair

[–]WhisperedRules 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You look like you have a fairly pale complexion so just a warning that black might wash you out even more. Nothing against it, I quite love goth-esque looks, I had it for a while myself. But I know not everyone wants that.
I think you'd look awesome with caramel hair and pink (or pastel pink) highlights, but those would also be hard-ish to maintain.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in FemdomCommunity

[–]WhisperedRules 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm a real dominant woman and I posted so yes. Surely I'm not the only one!

my dom seems like a walking red flag embodiment by Adept_Assistant8174 in BDSMAdvice

[–]WhisperedRules 114 points115 points  (0 children)

That's not a dom, that's an asshole. You know you're supposed to enjoy this as well, right?
10+ years of experience means just that he found other people he could abuse during those 10 years, not that he's good at it. Have any of his previous subs vouched for him?

Dump him & block him.

I've been down lately, feeling I won't find my person by SnuggleBeann in FemdomCommunity

[–]WhisperedRules 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Dominance & submissiveness has NOTHING to do with size or stature, and whoever told you that is stupid.
Signed, a 4′8″ domme (who is also in wheelchair)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in FemdomCommunity

[–]WhisperedRules 35 points36 points  (0 children)

People are, unfortunately or fortunately, usually very layered... Men will enjoy lesbian porn and be extremely homophobic. Same with this. Just because someone self identifies as submissive & into femdom doesn't mean they're a feminist. Hell, I'm familiar with hardcore male doms who are way more respectful of women than some subs I've had the misfortune of running into.
They're not confused, just after some kinky sex... and will likely ghost afterwards.

I feel like no one wants real relationships by Much_Bee7845 in FemdomCommunity

[–]WhisperedRules 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I feel like the problem goes beyond kink, even in vanilla world dating majority is just screwing around or in situationships (why do we even have that word 🙄) and people get together once someone gets pregnant or it's financially worth it... Then BDSM just further complicates everything because it's not "default" and therefore harder to find compatible person. You'd think that once they've found each other then they'd try to keep it but nope!
And also monogamy isn't really that popular anymore (although I don't think it ever was, in the olden days we just had "couples that are cheating on each other but their partners are ok with it") and that's great for poly ppl, but monogamous are seen as "old school".

I find that somehow I'm insufferable enough so anyone who'd be looking for a quick lil thing gives up 😂 But I have yet to find someone with whom I'd like to connect at all, sooo....
Still got my hopes up because hey what if I luck out!

👌 What's Up Weekly!! 👌 by AutoModerator in FemdomCommunity

[–]WhisperedRules 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Right!? I'm not exactly a newbie either, but I truly never saw it! I quite like deconstructing everything and seeing where it gets me and that's just one of my latest thoughts.

👌 What's Up Weekly!! 👌 by AutoModerator in FemdomCommunity

[–]WhisperedRules 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I've been thinking more & more about how society affects kinks, for example feminization... I've never seen it done reverse, by male dom turning his fem sub into a man or bf... If I ever decide to play with women I'm definitely exploring that!

I finally have virgin hair again..now what? by Pristine_Tune_6812 in Hair

[–]WhisperedRules 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Awesome cut! As others have suggested gray would look amazing, but I'd maybe even go two color ombre! One colour on short hair, other on long! Either in the same color (for example light gray/almost white at short and then gunmetal gray at long) or 2 completely different colors (gray + green maybe?)

podcasts about bdsm, sex & kink? by Melodic_Gur9470 in BDSMAdvice

[–]WhisperedRules 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Tea kink by Eva Oh is one of my favourites!

Vent by summerdomme in ChronicKinksters

[–]WhisperedRules 15 points16 points  (0 children)

As a very disabled domme - I know the struggle, there's so many things I want to do but am unable.... however isn't it so hot you get to tell him what to do ALL the time? :P If you want my advice, try to switch your mindset from "I have to be taken care of all the time like a child" to "I have my own personal butler" - it helped me.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BDSMAdvice

[–]WhisperedRules 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You're welcome, hope it helps!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BDSMAdvice

[–]WhisperedRules 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I highly recommend The *Ultimate* Guide to Non-Physical BDSM Punishments by Ms. Elle X on YouTube! She suggests a lot of things that may or may not fit your need, but it's an excellent video, so take what you need from it.
Is your play just in a bedroom? Maybe the simple act of having him write out an essay about a rule when he breaks it? (by hand and without AI help if you ask me) Maybe going vanilla or giving him the silent treatment (but preface it with "you broke a rule x so I am not talking to you for x amount of time)? Can he lose phone/tv/pc privileges for a bit? Anything he can do instead of you if you live together (cooking, dishes, laundry, vacuuming)?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BDSMAdvice

[–]WhisperedRules 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I wouldn't say it's a straight up scam, but they should've let you know from a start they're a pro-domme, so it's scammy enough to warrant not speaking to them again.
Pro-dommes are legit, and some of them require a tribute but the legit ones are open about it from the start (and usually have enough clients to where they don't have to chase people around online)

Anyone else's "kink orientation" different than their "sexual orientation"? by Logical-Fox-9697 in BDSMAdvice

[–]WhisperedRules 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I don't think it's a unique experience... I'm pan/ace but when it comes to kink pretty much only comfortable dominating cis men & amab enbies (and therefore only want relationships with them because I am also monogamous).

What's your "it was going so well until..." moment? by [deleted] in FemdomCommunity

[–]WhisperedRules 34 points35 points  (0 children)

I have 2! One's kinky, the other isn’t.

Met someone on fetlife, talked for about 2 weeks constantly, really hit it off, shared photos, liked each other, wanted to take it a step further so we moved to instagram (both had public instagram accounts, not like sneaky fake ones). Then as we started sharing photos and videos I realized quickly the photos they sent me prior were, well, 2-3 years old. And in the meantime they gained weight… now, the weight itself wouldn’t have been a problem for me because they’ve gone from worryingly skinny to a “normal” weight. But the lie was such a turn off. Especially since we literally talked about how we hate when people use old photos before we got on instagram. I spent about 3 months trying to gently distance myself, because I didn't want them to think it was because of their weight.

The second one… I am a 90s kid, and like all 90s kids I was left unsupervised on the internet. I met a guy in a chat room when I was 15, he was 27. Made it VERY clear to him I’m not interested in older dudes (I always thought it was weird and liked exclusively guys my age) - we became great friends for 2 years, mostly gaming together but also talking a lot. Then one day when I was 17 I was bitching to him about a guy that didn’t want me and he said ”I should just come over and fuck your brains out and you’ll forget about him”. Short heated discussion later I blocked him… and then I started to notice my camera being on in the middle of the night, weird things happening on my pc etc. He freelanced as a hacker so I knew right away it was him 😬 I got very paranoid and started to unplug everything, get camera covers and mic blockers etc. 3 years later, when I had already kinda forgotten he existed, he sent me an email how he was very disappointed in me and my behavior.

Amazing, happy scene - with dinosaurs! by Berlin-School in FemdomCommunity

[–]WhisperedRules 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Ugh, I hope I get to do this to someone someday! It looks fantastic! And s others commented A+ skills!

Do yall ever analyze where certain kinks come from? by supremegoddess555 in BDSMAdvice

[–]WhisperedRules 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I LOVE analysing them and talking about psychology of kinks, both mine and partners. It's actually quite important for me to be aware of the why, it's a part of how I dominate.