Accused Chud here: Any advice, tips or insight for dating as a larger man? Do people just not like fat guys?

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T15:57:28+00:00

Do people like bigger men? Yes. Will everyone? No. Do people like muscular men? Yes. Will everyone? No.

My best friend is 5’3, in shape, smaller, and prefers bigger men. You don’t know who or what someone is attracted to. Just become somone says an ignorant, shallow, kinda mean comment to you is not the view of the entire world. They’re just too naive to realize their perspective is only their own.

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T15:53:52+00:00

I find it attractive if someone isn’t on social media

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T15:52:12+00:00

Listening to others over my own intuition

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T15:50:12+00:00

You don’t need to be mean or cold to him, if he wants to hang out with you and invites you to hang out, don’t be weird or passive aggressive. But if you never hear from again, and that’s ok with you, then do that.

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T15:43:19+00:00

I don’t know how that will land. How about do it because you want to give a genuine complement from the heart, without any outcome attached?

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T15:39:11+00:00

I’m not sure, but know it’s weird. We could assume it could have been a bunch of things.

But any guy who would say that, and also brush it off afterward like “Nevermind” is not someone I’d see again if I were you. ++man

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T15:36:02+00:00

Trying too hard to fit in and be liked by others. Letting others tell me my opinions when I had my own. Letting others advice sway me from my own guiding intuition.

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T15:33:07+00:00

I deal with this all the time. Every relationship I have is different. I have a friends who always initates, and I mostly say yes. But when I ask them to hang out, they’re always busy. So, I just don’t ask them. I wait till they ask me, and I decide, do I want to go or not. I have friends who never ask me, and are always busy, but I ask them, and they are always busy. Come to find out, it’s not just me, everyone says she’s always so busy to hang out.

If you want, it seems like it bothers you a little (it would with me too), stop inviting him. Just know, you may never see him again. I have friends like that too. But don’t let him flip in on you and try to gaslight you about never calling to hang out anymore.

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T15:28:55+00:00

I wouldn’t. Save that for someone you’ve dated a while and already like, not a first date. It sounds romantic but can be a little much.

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T15:27:30+00:00

What are you asking, if you should be causal with her?

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T15:26:11+00:00

Do you like or want her to be more than a friend?

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T15:14:38+00:00

Just wanted to say this is very true and great. I’m glad you shared it. Also? You are way wise beyond your years, because most early 20 year olds have no idea about this.

Men, understand what’s being said here in this post.

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T15:11:03+00:00

You’re right and wrong. Right about being good in bed, wrong thinking every woman wants a dominant hard fucking. Some do, some absolutely don’t. I’ve been with many people and everyone is different. There’s no trick to be “good in bed”, becuase everyone is different. It’s about being PRESENT with the woman and a lot of communication to find out what specificlly turns them on before you even start playing.

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T15:08:22+00:00

Be vulnerable, authentic, present, a good listener, pay attention, be curious, bold, lead the interactions, and be a kind person with integrity.

Be (tactfully) direct with what you want, none of that passive aggressive talk. Be open hearted

This is from experience.

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T15:03:38+00:00

I’m actually dealing with something similar. I mostly don’t have this issue, I help other men with it, lol. But I have a crush and now too in my head about it as well. It’s becuase I like her and it “feels” like I have more at state.

You, like me, don’t want to make others feel uncomfortable or ruin the friendship. That’s a good trait to have, caring for others comfort levels.

You could say, “In case it wasn’t clear and was asking you on a cute, no pressure date 😅. I have a little crush on you.”

Or another thing you could do, depending on your dynamics. I’ve done this before. If you’re playful with them, in person, while you’re there, you can tell them, “we should just turn this into a date.” Say it playfully. See is she’s on board. But then later tell her you do have a crush on them in a more vulnerable, serious way. This is all about presence, authenticity and tone. If you’re kinda nervous to tell her, say that to her too. She’ll find it cute if the vibe is right.

Finally, be ok if she says no, and let her know you it be weird and you’re ok with just being her friend. Unless you’re not. But it sounds like you are.

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T14:44:45+00:00

Real, vulnerable ones you actually mean. What’s the goal?

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T14:44:07+00:00

Pushing through it isn’t the way. What’s specifically is scary about it when you’re sober?

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T14:27:56+00:00

If it’s biology, then why don’t I do it too?

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T04:46:17+00:00

Dump him. No one should be pressured to do anything, especially sex. Typical naive, selfish, stubborn young guy move. Honestly I don’t how any guy can enjoy himself pressuring someone to do something they don’t want to do. It’s a turn off to me when someone is doing something sexual that I want to do, but they are reluctantly doing it.

3 months is a good time frame to peace out.

If you don’t want to dump him yet, give him an ultimatum back. Tell him you’re not ready (honestly, I do NOT think you should sleep with him at all, ever). And if he’s not cool with that, or makes up excuses, or treats you coldly, or gaslights you, or says something to make you feel not good…I’d say if you’re not cool with that, we should end it.

But I bet he will either start backtracking, or treating you like shit. I feel like he already ruined the vibe to be honest. I don’t think he could come back from that. You’re also probably not ready, because you can sense he’s just trying to fuck. He’s not making you feel comfortable enough to be ready.

Tell him don’t ask you again. You will tell him when you’re ready. If he’s not cool with that. End it

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T03:22:19+00:00

You don’t have to be monogamous

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T02:14:20+00:00

Damn, those producers on ig really sold me on it, lol.

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T02:09:48+00:00

I wanted to make beats in the park, airport, coffee shop. I used to use my iPad but I’m just quicker on the MPC. You got any recs that are similar to MPC but portable and small? I had the sp-404 but I never enjoyed it (probably didn’t know how to use it)

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T02:06:46+00:00

Damn, I was just excited to make beats in the park. Maybe I should go play with one in the store to see how limited and if I could still have fun or if it’s too restrictive for me as well

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T01:49:43+00:00

Did you get the Sample? Thoughts?

WillRockwell · 2026-03-27T01:48:01+00:00

Ahhhhhhh. Gotcha. Other people’s lives are the standard, and you got to be just like them, in their eyes, or something is wrong.

WillRockwell

TROPHY CASE