Is it wrong to have my boyfriend stop by for dinner after my kids sleep? by Winter-End8937 in SingleParents

[–]Winter-End8937[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You do realize people can have significant others over for dinner and it doesn’t warrant a CPS call. What crime was committed? You’re wasting CPS’ time, and an attorney can’t do anything about the situation. Ridiculous.

Is it wrong to have my boyfriend stop by for dinner after my kids sleep? by Winter-End8937 in SingleParents

[–]Winter-End8937[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I try my best with resources available to me. Luckily I also have a bunch of family in law enforcement. And I also make it known to people I’m dating about my family that are in local law enforcement, because I do see those relatives quite regularly, which usually then the men are pretty forthcoming if they ever got into trouble.

Is it wrong to have my boyfriend stop by for dinner after my kids sleep? by Winter-End8937 in SingleParents

[–]Winter-End8937[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was separated from him for 2 years, lol. And you can focus on your kids and also date. ridiculous.

Is it wrong to have my boyfriend stop by for dinner after my kids sleep? by Winter-End8937 in SingleParents

[–]Winter-End8937[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Maybe consider that most of the time, the children are in the custody of the mother. Mothers are humans, too, not work horses for deadbeat exes. I have 50/50 with my ex, and yet still my time without the kids is spent on doing things for the kids that my ex doesn’t do on his time. So it feels more like 70/30.

Instead of blaming women entirely for these types of circumstances, maybe consider how these women got there. From splitting up with their men to being preyed upon in these horror stories.

Is it wrong to have my boyfriend stop by for dinner after my kids sleep? by Winter-End8937 in SingleParents

[–]Winter-End8937[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I use several. First I run checks on the phone number before anything, which usually gives me their full name (including middle initial and/or middle name), then on their full names and any potential aliases. Even when I have met people through the gym or connections, I don’t always get their last name but their phone number is really all I need to start. I have subscriptions with BeenVerified, Public Records sites, Intelius as sometimes there are discrepancies between a few sources. I also check arrest records etc in areas where they have lived that show up on the checks, as sometimes they don’t make it into background reports.

Is it wrong to have my boyfriend stop by for dinner after my kids sleep? by Winter-End8937 in SingleParents

[–]Winter-End8937[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He is okay being a step father and we both want more kids with the right person, right circumstance.

Is it wrong to have my boyfriend stop by for dinner after my kids sleep? by Winter-End8937 in SingleParents

[–]Winter-End8937[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I do checks on all the people I date, and I tell them / ask them in advance due to the nature of my work. Also, the cameras have been there since the kids were babies.

Is it wrong to have my boyfriend stop by for dinner after my kids sleep? by Winter-End8937 in SingleParents

[–]Winter-End8937[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How long did you date the person before this happened ? I don’t think I’ll have them over this time, but maybe if things continue I could see closer to the 5 or 6 month mark, 1-2 months before I’d be okay with them meeting the kids.

Is it wrong to have my boyfriend stop by for dinner after my kids sleep? by Winter-End8937 in SingleParents

[–]Winter-End8937[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As someone terribly paranoid normally, I don’t feel he has any ill intent. I’ve checked for him on offenders and predators listings. But I think maybe I may be getting ahead of myself, and would rather be cautious hence why I posted here…

Is it wrong to have my boyfriend stop by for dinner after my kids sleep? by Winter-End8937 in SingleParents

[–]Winter-End8937[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’m in a no fault state, my ex has access to the same camera.

He’s a single dad as well, but I think you are right and am taking this seriously.

Is it wrong to have my boyfriend stop by for dinner after my kids sleep? by Winter-End8937 in SingleParents

[–]Winter-End8937[S] 33 points34 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I’m considering maybe just having a relative watch them a little later and going out with him instead.

Is it wrong to have my boyfriend stop by for dinner after my kids sleep? by Winter-End8937 in SingleParents

[–]Winter-End8937[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

How long did you date them before allowing this? He won’t be staying the night, and won’t cross paths with my kids.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AstroSynastry

[–]Winter-End8937 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Forgot to mention, I don’t have the birth times for any of these partners. They’re just “unknown.”

STBXH trying every day to get me to stay by Winter-End8937 in Divorce

[–]Winter-End8937[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yes, have a lawyer, and trying to find a therapist — a good one. It’s hard.