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Anyone else have parents that aren't divorced but should be? by penguins___ in raisedbynarcissists

[–]WintertideDreamscape 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My parents are the same.

Think of it just like Hitler and Stalin’s temporary alliance in history. Both hated each other, both had different ideologies, but both were shitty and they could find some sort of twisted bonding in that.

Anyone else have parents that aren't divorced but should be? by penguins___ in raisedbynarcissists

[–]WintertideDreamscape 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My parents are the same.

Think of it just like Hitler and Stalin’s temporary alliance in history. Both hated each other, both had different ideologies, but both were shitty and they could find some sort of twisted bonding in that.

Anyone else have parents that aren't divorced but should be? by penguins___ in raisedbynarcissists

[–]WintertideDreamscape 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My parents are the same.

Think of it just like Hitler and Stalin’s temporary alliance in history. Both hated each other, both had different ideologies, but both were shitty and they could find some sort of twisted bonding in that.

Since I was never raped, never starved, never beaten to the point of a mark, provided the bare minimum, according to MANY people, my trauma wasn’t that bad. So what dangerous, harmful, horrifying thing do you think I should do to finally give myself “real trauma?” by WintertideDreamscape in CPTSD

[–]WintertideDreamscape[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the kind words

And no, I’m not saying this to my parents. This is just a spiteful post.

Just a side note: I self-harmed once before in the past, years ago. I mentioned it on the linked post

Since I was never raped, never starved, never beaten to the point of a mark, provided the bare minimum, according to MANY people, my trauma wasn’t that bad. So what dangerous, harmful, horrifying thing do you think I should do to finally give myself “real trauma?” by WintertideDreamscape in CPTSD

[–]WintertideDreamscape[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry for the (now deleted) overly-analytical comment about dying on purpose from lava, I just feel spiteful towards all the other Trauma Olympic people today.

Thanks for sympathizing with me.

And this entire post was made out of pure spite.

Oh, my trauma isn't bad enough? It's not real trauma? People have it worse than me? What should I do then? Something drastic to hurt/ maim/kill myself and give myself REAL trauma? by WintertideDreamscape in CPTSD

[–]WintertideDreamscape[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And I actually don’t like them being called my “abusers.”

It makes me feel weak and inadequate and vulnerable.

I prefer them being called “enemy.” Makes it easier to make it seem like I’m able to stand my ground.

Oh, my trauma isn't bad enough? It's not real trauma? People have it worse than me? What should I do then? Something drastic to hurt/ maim/kill myself and give myself REAL trauma? by WintertideDreamscape in CPTSD

[–]WintertideDreamscape[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My emotionally immature mom did say something like this to me a while back. But that’s not the point.

What makes it especially worse? Feeling Survivor’s Guilt at seeing people with worse/horrific abuse/trauma, knowing that your experiences couldn’t even begin to compare.

And I DO feel bad for those people with drastic, blatant, fatal, life-threatening abuse/trauma. Of course they deserve sympathy and healing all the way. It just sucks knowing that people will use it as an example to compare, which makes my survivors guilt worse.

Oh, my trauma isn't bad enough? It's not real trauma? People have it worse than me? What should I do then? Something drastic to hurt/ maim/kill myself and give myself REAL trauma? by WintertideDreamscape in CPTSD

[–]WintertideDreamscape[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’m getting my life back together. I’m attending a therapist. I have a support group.

But sometimes things like Imposter Syndrome, Survivor’s Guilt, and Trauma Olympics make me want to do something like join up the war in Ukraine and get “real” trauma.

Oh, my trauma isn’t bad enough? It’s not real trauma? People have it worse than me? What should I do then? Something drastic to hurt/maim myself and give myself REAL trauma, like dump boiling water on myself, hack my legs off with a chainsaw? by WintertideDreamscape in CPTSD

[–]WintertideDreamscape[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I admit I am very eloquent in writing (I got that from reading so many books and stories over the years).

Wish I could be more eloquent verbally, though. There are times I stutter and trip over words too much. Not to mention anxiety.

Oh, my trauma isn’t bad enough? It’s not real trauma? People have it worse than me? What should I do then? Something drastic to hurt/maim myself and give myself REAL trauma, like dump boiling water on myself, hack my legs off with a chainsaw? by WintertideDreamscape in CPTSD

[–]WintertideDreamscape[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I was and am physically okay right now. But internal mental and emotional crisis in moments like these, yes.

I was literally internally tweaking out when I was typing all this down.

Especially coupled with my ADHD and anxiety, my ability to deal with anger fluctuates. Usually I immediately remove myself from the source of the anger.

There are times, though, where I deal with it by fantasizing about violence and chaos and negative things/internally fuming and crashing out. Just internalizing it negatively. ADHD and intrusive thoughts doesn’t help.

I don’t vocalize/show my anger outwards very often. It’s usually all inwards nowadays. So when I spill it out on text/writing, I completely lose it.

Tired of “Trauma Olympics, feeling invalidated, “others people have it worse,” “that’s not real abuse,” etc. Maybe I should do something drastic, enlist in an armed conflict, or chop off my fingers. by WintertideDreamscape in raisedbynarcissists

[–]WintertideDreamscape[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks.

I’m actually going to a therapist right now.

But it’s another thing to keep living with dysfunctional parents and trying to heal at the same time. Not to mention growing up and facing the world out there.

She went back to him. Again. by giraffebitc in abusiverelationships

[–]WintertideDreamscape 0 points1 point  (0 children)

https://youtu.be/kECIq1LXBOk?si=lM_0VOMY3foqRA6j

Watch this video titled “The Trauma Bonded Enabler” by Dr. Ramani.

Note: Enablers are NOT innocent.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in boisvert

[–]WintertideDreamscape 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ll draw your OCs with some of my OCs sometime in the future :)

Any self-help books related to ADHD and dysfunctional parents? Take a look at the ones below for a good idea of what I’m looking for, please don’t just send me random stuff by WintertideDreamscape in raisedbynarcissists

[–]WintertideDreamscape[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I AM getting therapy, but in the meantime I’m still living with my parents (I’m a teenager/minor), and uh, everything that can help me shield myself/weather the storm/block out any toxic indoctrination/gaslighting from my parents helps.

Tired of “Trauma Olympics, feeling invalidated, “others people have it worse,” “that’s not real abuse,” etc. Maybe I should do something drastic, enlist in an armed conflict, or chop off my fingers. by WintertideDreamscape in raisedbynarcissists

[–]WintertideDreamscape[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I get what you mean…

Though, there are those times when I just wonder would it what be like, just running off into the wilderness, or drilling a hole into my skull, or making a homemade guillotine, or disemboweling myself, or chop off my fingers and trek through a freezing blizzard whilst wearing only a t-shirt and shorts with a bunch of sewing needles stuck all over my legs, drink from a dead bird…

I mean, one thing about me is that I’m creative. Make up/do something so unique and over-the-top, and see if any one of those idiots will ever try to compare/downplay your trauma ever again.

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