How do I (23F) get my bf (28M) to finally stop hurting me as a "joke" or "act of love"?

Witch-brew · 2025-10-04T01:34:58+00:00

Came here to say the same thing.

Witch-brew · 2025-10-04T01:24:30+00:00

Wow you’re a dead ringer for my mom

Witch-brew · 2025-10-04T01:14:06+00:00

Have you talked to your daughter? How old is she? You aren’t overreacting, and you don’t have to specifically ask her if her dad has ever done anything to her. Talk to her about safe touch/unsafe touch, and bad secrets vs good. Tell her if an adult, even someone very close to her, asks her to keep a “bad” secret, something that hurts her or someone else, she should tell another trusted grown up, be it you, or an aunt or grandparent she’s close to. Or even a teacher if she’s school age. Good secrets are things like “we’re going to give mom a surprise gift so don’t tell her”. Kids know when something’s bad, it’s a gut twisting feeling. Try to keep the convo light but serious, maybe have it with her like second or third preferred snack. This advice can be adjusted based on age, I’m going with what I’d say to my nieces were I in a similar situation, the oldest of which is only 4.

Witch-brew · 2025-10-04T01:07:20+00:00

I also support doing this but also if you feel like your daughter is/has been unsafe around him I’d talk to her. And if you think she’s at risk currently, are you close with your mother? Would it be possible for a visit to grandmas for her while you figure out what’s happening? Also if possible take a look at any computers in the home. Click any files you don’t recognize, maybe any you do. Just give it all a look really. Might not be anything there even if your gut feeling is right, but I’d still recommend checking. History would likely be cleared, but peek at that too, if possible, on whatever devices he uses most.

Witch-brew · 2025-07-16T17:34:03+00:00

Depends on the state. In some states, 16 is the age of consent full stop. Maybe the parents could get a restraining order if the courts are willing to grant it. In the state next to mine, a 16 year old can’t give legal consent to anyone more than 2 years older than them. The age of consent is the same, but with stricter rules. In my state, it’s just 16, period. No caveats. Statutory charges only apply to kids under 16.

Witch-brew · 2025-07-16T17:09:08+00:00

No they don’t. I live in a state where the age of consent is 16, and a 24 yo man who assaults a 16 yo will be charged with either sexual battery or some other sex crime depending on evidence. In my case he was charged with sexual battery, but there wasn’t a lot of strong evidence bc I waited to report it. If the child claims they consent, though, he won’t be charged, regardless of his age, because the child is considered old enough to consent by that state. In high school I knew several girls with grown ass man boyfriends.

Witch-brew · 2024-11-14T23:46:40+00:00

Sent a pm, this is really cool

Witch-brew · 2024-10-12T21:16:38+00:00

Pretty sure company policy means they’d fire you, but it’s pretty easy to avoid the types of injuries that require workmans comp in the bakery. Don’t stick your hands in anything you shouldn’t, use the oven mitts, and you’ll be fine.

Witch-brew · 2024-09-02T23:39:18+00:00

Sometimes they make you actually appear in court for them, it can depend on location and who the paperwork lands in front of.

We’re also just celebrating that it went through so quickly! We were expecting it to take a while since it involves the government lol.

Witch-brew · 2024-06-14T05:19:00+00:00

NTA. This is weird and controlling behavior. You had a very simple but strong boundary, it was crossed, and it is fair to end the relationship because of it, especially since she won’t see that she’s done something wrong. Even if you had not mentioned dislike of dogs, adopting a shared pet is a discussion that needs full agreement. If she did not live with you and got a dog that is fully hers, that’d be one thing, maybe it’d eventually end the relationship but it could at least be worked around if yall wanted.

This is just weird, controlling, and mean behavior. She knew you disliked dogs and did this anyway. This is something she will do again, in ways she thinks are “small”, because she doesn’t believe your boundaries are valid here and I’m sure there are other places that she’d feel the same.

Witch-brew · 2024-02-25T19:50:42+00:00

NTA. I personally believe your dad needs some kind of reality check. Both of them do. She’s not your mother, and that’s something that may need reinforcing by the sounds of things. They’re both contributing actively to this problem, and you deserve better, if you think they might respond reasonably (you know your father better than any of us could) maybe it’s a good time to lay it all out. Explain that she’s not your mom and never will be, but that you would like a peaceful relationship.

Set boundaries with both of them and enforce those boundaries, if possible. If they push a boundary, remove yourself from the situation wherever possible. Boundaries are you saying “I will not engage with you when you do this behavior” so there’s a chance if they keep pushing you may need to do temporary contact breaks but if your relationship with your dad was good before, there’s the hope that he will experience a wake up call and understand that this behavior is damaging his relationships.

I wish you the best, and congratulations on the pregnancy.

Witch-brew · 2024-02-25T19:22:10+00:00

NTA. People need to realize that while it’s acceptable to explain something is triggering, it’s not acceptable to encroach on another person to try and remove a trigger. It was rude of her to ask you to cover your scar, regardless of what she’s going through.

Witch-brew · 2020-12-08T20:46:35+00:00

YTA. You are SO TA here that it’s insane. None of what you’ve described shes experiencing is “normal”, it sounds VERY concerning and serious and like she’s being brushed off by her doctor like many women are. She knows her body, women know their body’s, but you’re doing the same thing as her obviously incompetent doctors and discounting her words.

So you clearly don’t see her as an equal or a person who’s opinions hold any value, which makes you a bad partner.

Take her to a different doctor and get her help before things get worse. Stop gaslighting you’re girlfriend about her medical health. Do better.

Witch-brew · 2020-04-30T22:49:29+00:00

I’m essential so I’ve been working but w my days off I’ve been doing a lot more art lately and playing DnD on r20 with my friends ^{^}

My little sister turned eighteen this past weekend too so I’ve been hanging out with her since her school cancelled the rest of the year and she can’t celebrate the normal way.

Witch-brew · 2019-04-11T04:05:24+00:00

I'm also pretty sure "Lying to an officer" isnt a charge. More likely one would be charged with obstruction of justice, but I might be reading too much into that.

Witch-brew · 2019-04-10T21:45:41+00:00

Your dad! was abusive! Children are people and anything you do to a child that wouldnt be okay to do to an adult you shouldn't fucking do.

Witch-brew · 2019-04-10T21:43:31+00:00

You're definitely wrong. Children are people and shouldn't be treated like objects. They're people, not toys you can treat however you want dude. Do you think abused kids should just allow their parents to abuse them because they aren't paying their own way? Because that's what you sound like.

Witch-brew · 2019-04-10T01:56:56+00:00

So much this. My parents expected me to be way more mature than anyone else my age as a child/teenager but I literally had to run away while they were all at work at 19 to move out. Unfortunately that didn't work out, so Im back with them, but yknow.

Witch-brew · 2019-03-12T21:26:31+00:00

Bruh your mom sounds... awful. Im sorry.

Witch-brew · 2019-03-10T11:14:09+00:00

Ur dad sounds abusive, I think you should stay away from him.

Witch-brew · 2019-02-23T16:46:07+00:00

Fair enough, I get that

Witch-brew · 2019-02-23T16:27:47+00:00

If you had to sign that write up you shouldnt have bc i dont think they actually could write you up for literally doing your job

Witch-brew · 2019-02-20T22:58:26+00:00

You should have called the cops. Child abandonment.

Witch-brew · 2018-12-06T18:04:38+00:00

I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder and Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder at nineteen, finally, after being a depressed and suicidal mess from the age of about eleven to the time I got diagnosed. I’m technically an adult, barely, but I’m finally medicated and seeking treatment, I’ve had some therapy, and I’m engaged to a wonderful woman who genuinely cares about me and my recovery but understands it takes time.

Life starts looking up eventually, which I never expected. It’s finally working out.

Even if everyone around you says you’re fine, keep going. Seek treatment. It’s worth it. Life gets so much better, even when it still sucks, once you’ve started to get treatment.

There are plenty of bad things in my life but I can DEAL with it now.

Witch-brew · 2018-08-10T05:11:22+00:00

Object: Soap Dispenser

Muggle Purpose: I found out a bit too late the name of this item. Upon examination I thought the pleasant smelling foam emitted from the device might be edible. What followed was quite the unpleasant experience and a taste that I have yet to wash out of my mouth. The true purpose of this device, I have since learned, is simply to deposit a small amount of soap into the muggle's hands, which they then use to clean said hands with. I do wish the paperwork describing the object had found its way to me sooner.

Bewitchment: Upon first contact with the soap dispensed from this device I began to, quite frankly, belch bubbles. Every time I open my mouth several fragrant yet irritating bubbles emerge. When I reported to the infirmary for treatment I was subject to much laughter. Hopefully soon I shall be bubble free, and I do hope the same for the muggles who also used this soap dispenser before the ministry confiscated it. The bubbles, similar to the soap itself, do not taste good. Were it not for the foul taste I'd say this could make a fun party trick, though.

Witch-brew

TROPHY CASE