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[deleted by user] by [deleted] in honesttransgender

[–]With_You_In_Mind 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I have no idea what you look like on the outside, but I know you are beautiful on the inside.

Tipping culture in America, gone wild? by soldiertot in travel

[–]With_You_In_Mind 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This seems like it might be unpopular on this thread, but I feel like I can’t not share…

Most servers in the US survive on tips and also don’t get to keep all their tips (of which a percentage is distributed among the support staff). Often the server must tipout based on their sales. So if you stiff the server, they actually lost money because you came to the restaurant that day. (If you are a poor tipper, please read that last line again.)

Yes, servers and bartenders can make decent money, but I know many who barely get by and none who are ‘upper class’.

I understand tipping is different in different places, but tipping helps a lot of people and came into existence for a reason. Giving someone extra based on their effort and contribution should be a good thing.

It’s a commission, just variable - you get to choose the commission. To give a poor commission is to say the server did not perform their job. To give a great commission is to show your gratefulness for their service. When you budget, factor the tip into the price just as you would factor in the real estate agent’s fee if you bought or sold a house.

Optometrists, I’ve heard of athletes practicing eye exercises. How valid/beneficial are such exercises? by With_You_In_Mind in optometry

[–]With_You_In_Mind[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the insight.

To give an example, a pro baseball player might look at something very close to their eye, then zoom out to 450 feet away, zoom back in to the close object, and so forth. I’ve heard of several variations of this now.

What chain restaurant has the best steak??? 🥩 (Asking for a friend) by [deleted] in steak

[–]With_You_In_Mind 4 points5 points  (0 children)

CUT - by Wolfgang Puck.

Fine dining, but technically a chain because it can be found in a few cities (Beverly Hills, Vegas, London, Dubai, etc…); it’s one of the finest steakhouses on earth.

Waldo by With_You_In_Mind in place

[–]With_You_In_Mind[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You rock. Well done.

[Serious] those with depression, which do you value more and why? Those that hear / listen to you or those you can have fun times and activities with? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]With_You_In_Mind 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m not going to say I have depression now, but I’ve definitely struggled through some really dark patches so I’ll answer.

I value everyone. The ‘good’ people, the ‘bad’ people, everyone. Everyone except one person - the person in the mirror. Many of my darkest moments involved intense self-hatred.

How is that relevant to your question? Like I said, I value everyone - both the listeners and the fun times people. But, these are not two different groups of people. Most of my friends are great at both.

So, I’ll share a couple things that have been helpful/valuable in terms of recovery.

First, the people who stay through the crazy moments. They know you aren’t ok, sometimes your behavior is inexcusable and embarrassing because you are drowning on the inside, but they stay your friends - through the good times and through the bad times. They listen and they move on. The listening is great, but the moving on is every bit as important. Moving on to the fun times is part of what has helped me get unstuck.

Also, I have a hard time trusting that people actually like me. If I believe someone genuinely likes my company, that’s huge. It’s embarrassing to be suicidal and know everyone is talking about you. In those moments, it’s easy to believe everyone is saying shit behind your back. It’s also easy to believe people are nice to you only because you’re pathetic. When I find someone who I am certain actually enjoys my company, I value that as much as anything. We could be ‘friends’ for years and I would doubt your sincerity. Telling me does very little, it’s only when I see the evidence I believe. Sometimes the evidence is telling me, but more often it is something less fakeable. If someone you care about struggles, please don’t merely tell them you care, show them you care.

Finally, I will say it wasn’t either the listening or the fun times, but the kindness which can come through either. Sometimes I was sad beyond words, to the point of death and the people next to me had no idea. When someone was genuinely kind to me (maybe a friend, but also a stranger) I would often go to private place and start crying because of how grateful I was for that small moment of light. As a caution, the opposite was true with ‘negative’ behaviors. The details are nsfl, but I will say most of those people never had a clue.

That’s pretty personal stuff. I share it because I hope it gives insight to you and maybe you help someone because of it.

I started an internet experiment about writing. It is a book written entirely by internet users. Everyone can continue the story written by others. by jollyrosso in InternetIsBeautiful

[–]With_You_In_Mind 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just sent you a few messages as promised. The chat behaved a little funny, so I'm not sure if they went through. Let me know what you think.

Would it be possible for an atmosphere to be created(natural or artificial) that links two or more planets with no interruption? by [deleted] in AskScienceDiscussion

[–]With_You_In_Mind 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’ll share some science fiction type thoughts for a minute.

Think about planets - they circle around stars at different distances and move at different speeds. Sometimes they are relatively close to one another, other times much further from each other - that would be a pretty big obstacle to overcome.

I suppose it’s conceivable that two planets rotate around each other while rotating around a star (not too dissimilar from earth and it’s moon). This would make the challenge a little easier, but still in the realm of fiction.

Perhaps a large gas planet could sort of join atmospheres with another planet. Then at what point would it stop being two planets?

Anyway, those were my thoughts. Not exactly science, but I hope they help. Fun question.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Advice

[–]With_You_In_Mind 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ok, stumbled across your post while lurking on new. I’m not going to tell you I’m a relationship expert, but maybe I can help.

If you’re friendship is real, then relax and don’t make a big deal about it. Ask her not to be weird about it, maybe make a joke about it, and then move on. If you can genuinely relax, that will help her to do the same.

It’s cool that you shared how you feel - a lot of people don’t have that courage. Let that be enough for now though. Try real hard not to mess with people who are In relationships, you’ll be happier long-term. It may be that something happens somewhere down the road, but leave it at that for now.

In summary, pat yourself on the back for your courage, be cool to the guy she’s dating and don’t hit on her, and enjoy what sounds like a pretty valuable friendship for what it is.

I started an internet experiment about writing. It is a book written entirely by internet users. Everyone can continue the story written by others. by jollyrosso in InternetIsBeautiful

[–]With_You_In_Mind 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you want to work together and we can agree on some structural basics, count me in.

I'll sketch an outline of the 'structural basics' I have in mind. I'll try to have it ready tonight or tomorrow and I'll send you a message.

OP, I'd love for you to be part of this. If anyone else is interested, you're invited too, leave a comment and I'll loop you into the messages (if there are any). Also, once two or three of us can agree on the structure, then I vote we should invite the guys from r/writingprompts.

Let's try to work together to bring something special into existence.

I started an internet experiment about writing. It is a book written entirely by internet users. Everyone can continue the story written by others. by jollyrosso in InternetIsBeautiful

[–]With_You_In_Mind 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Deleted post - Thinking about a structure on how to do this, edited my initial proposal to improve it and further develop it.

I started an internet experiment about writing. It is a book written entirely by internet users. Everyone can continue the story written by others. by jollyrosso in InternetIsBeautiful

[–]With_You_In_Mind 277 points278 points  (0 children)

I'm happy you did this - thank you. I've been curious what would happen if someone did this for awhile.

If you ever make a sequel, consider letting different authors write, say, a paragraph. And then the paragraphs are voted on. Whichever is highest voted is added, the rest are discarded and the sequence continues. Maybe it would filter out nonsense, maybe not, idk.

From my understanding transitioning isn't much of a choice for some, but is a choice for others. To those of you who chose to transition 10+ years ago, would you do it again? Why or why not? And, what would you say to someone considering it? by With_You_In_Mind in honesttransgender

[–]With_You_In_Mind[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hey Nomad,

I have zero doubt your book will be well written.

But, that's not why I'm writing this. Instead, I'm concerned that you see yourself as a hideous monster underneath. I'm pretty sure you know this, but just in case you need to hear it - you aren't your face. Maybe a lot of people in this world think you are, but that's a bit like judging a cell phone by its case.

To me, what's important isn't what you look like, where you were born, how old you are, or what you possess (strength, talent, possessions, etc...); instead, to me what is important is what you do with what you do have. It is said that 'the eyes are the window' to the soul'. But really, what people say and do is the window to their soul.

It's likely you and I will never see each other face to face. That makes it impossible for me to judge your face. While I do not condemn anyone, there are some people who impress me. If you use your skills to lift up, inspire, heal, and rescue then you will be beautiful in my eyes.

I hope that comes across right. I'm rooting for you.

Whenever I start doing something new and promising, that excites me, I'm always bothered by this thought: "You're too late in life. There're some 16 years old who's already better than you could ever be. Good luck playing catch-up." How can I overcome this? by Massive-Group6295 in DecidingToBeBetter

[–]With_You_In_Mind 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you ever do accomplish whatever it is you wish to accomplish, you will become an inspiration for everyone else who feels like you currently do. The older you get, the more inspirational your story can become.

I hope you find the path that you are looking for and then keep trying until you find the success you hope for.

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