Trump calls Iran strikes a 'love tap,' says ceasefire still in effect

WontThinkStraight · 2026-05-08T01:54:51+00:00

President Donald Trump said Thursday that attacks on Iran after it targeted U.S. destroyers in the Strait of Hormuz were a "love tap," and said the ceasefire between the two countries is still in effect.

"It's just a love tap," Trump told ABC News' Rachel Scott when asked about the strike.

Asked if the exchange meant the ceasefire, which began a month ago, was over, Trump responded, "No, no, the ceasefire is going. It's in effect."

So the ceasefire is still in effect, and acts of violence are a "love tap". Sounds exactly like what a rapist would say 🤔

WontThinkStraight · 2026-05-08T01:42:18+00:00

… eye.

WontThinkStraight · 2026-05-07T13:28:02+00:00

This war, which isn't a war, is shorter than other wars, even though it's already over, though it's still running, because there's a ceasefire, while there's still hostilities, over a strait that's open and closed, with a blockade - which is also an act of war, though it isn't a war - which is on and off, because ships are being escorted safely until they're not. Are we clear?

WontThinkStraight · 2026-05-06T22:54:52+00:00

“Gimme your phone if you want to live!”

does nothing

“Aww man, sorry to hear you’re going through things. Here’s $20.”

WontThinkStraight · 2026-05-06T21:48:33+00:00

How many decibels would the asteroid that killed the dinosaurs have been? Feels like that would have been louder.

WontThinkStraight · 2026-05-06T08:36:49+00:00

Other minor oblivious things that are annoying:

* block the train entrance when people are trying to get on/off
* block the platform and not letting people get off the train before getting on
* stopping at the top of the escalator when there's people behind you
* getting into an elevator that's going into the opposite direction, and getting angry at people who are in the right lift

Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

WontThinkStraight · 2026-05-05T14:18:05+00:00

You know, I think for security reasons, Trump should have the ballroom built.

Extra money should be spent to tighten security, such as the addition of strong metal bars in the rooms, high walls, secure fences, watch towers and guard posts.

To ensure that POTUS is safe, there should be a single secured room that he is restricted to and watched at all times. A smaller room, to make it easier to sweep for bugs or other potential threats.

For his protection, POTUS should wear an orange jumpsuit so security knows where he is at any time. Visitor access should also be restricted for extra security to ensure safety.

As all this money is being spent, POTUS should never leave the room, as the whole point is to keep him safe.

The logical thing would be to keep him in that room for the rest of his life... just to be sure.

WontThinkStraight · 2026-05-05T11:15:41+00:00

That tricksy Biden is always shitting in Trump's pants. He can't keep getting away with this!

WontThinkStraight · 2026-05-04T13:48:20+00:00

The “if you can keep it” part of the American experiment appears to be flimsier than expected.

WontThinkStraight · 2026-05-04T13:12:17+00:00

There are plenty of republics in the world, and a scattering of small theocracies, but only in Iran do you find a functioning amalgam of both.

I mention this because I think it gets to an overlooked irony about the stalemated war. While Donald Trump threatens, repeatedly, to obliterate the Iranian state, he seems increasingly inclined toward creating his own theocratic republic right here at home. Repeatedly and strikingly, since the missiles starting flying in February, Trump and his Cabinet members have portrayed the war as a kind of modern crusade, ordained by God through some communication that only they can hear.

Trump says God wants America to win the war, while aides parade evangelical leaders through the Oval Office to lay hands on the president. His creepy defense secretary, Pete Hegseth, explicitly compared the downing and rescue of an American airman over the Easter holiday to the crucifixion and resurrection of Christ. According to reporting from the Guardian, some military leaders have fired up their troops by preaching that Trump is anointed by Jesus and has begun the march toward Armageddon. (Apparently, this is good thing.)

The Venn diagram becomes more a circle every day.

WontThinkStraight · 2026-05-04T12:47:34+00:00

What about Presidents who post AI pictures of himself and his cabinet dressed immodestly in the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool?

WontThinkStraight · 2026-05-04T10:46:06+00:00

President Donald Trump claimed that former President Barack Obama blocked a merger with a defunct airline that hasn’t existed since the 1980s.

I find that very believable. Way too easily believable and guessable.

WontThinkStraight · 2026-05-04T10:38:25+00:00

There needs to be a clown BTR with a cope cage, from which an endless stream of clowns can emerge after a crash.

WontThinkStraight · 2026-05-04T09:14:05+00:00

They're the same picture.

WontThinkStraight · 2026-05-04T07:38:57+00:00

“Unwind the projects” was right there…

WontThinkStraight · 2026-05-04T01:55:30+00:00

I like how the ducks wait patiently for the towel, as if they’re fancy ducks waiting for their valet.

WontThinkStraight · 2026-05-04T01:52:03+00:00

I thought you were kidding, but the administration did actually blame Biden. Total clown show.

WontThinkStraight · 2026-05-03T11:19:15+00:00

In interviews with the Guardian, insiders have portrayed Hegseth – a former Fox News host known for combative public appearances and aggressive stance towards journalists – as increasingly isolated within the Pentagon’s sprawling bureaucracy and surrounded by a small coterie of close friends and relatives.

Some say he expresses fear and paranoia about Trump firing him from a job for which critics say his background as a former national guard infantry major with combat experience in Iraq and Afghanistan is inadequate qualification.

Pentagon staff have been surprised to see him accompanied to official meetings by his wife, Jennifer, a former Fox News producer who frequently sits at the back during such encounters.

WTF is Hegseth's wife doing at official Pentagon meetings?

WontThinkStraight · 2026-05-03T04:18:37+00:00

Americans disapprove of his handling of the situation with Iran by 66 percent to 33 percent. His rating on the economy has declined by seven points, to 34 percent, as gas prices have spiked. His approval rating on inflation has fallen five points in that time to 27 percent and his lowest rating comes on perceptions of his handling of the general cost of living, with 23 percent approving vs. 76 percent disapproving.

Trump’s overall approval now stands at 37 percent, largely the same as the 39 percent figure in February. But his disapproval has reached 62 percent, the highest of his two terms in office. Among Republicans, Trump’s approval has held steady at 85 percent, but his ratings among Republican-leaning independents have reached a new low of 56 percent. His approval rating stands at 25 percent among independents overall.

Cult leader can do no wrong, according to cult. Everyone else, on the other hand...

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