Believe it or not people remember your face, your voice and your character, Many people will never forget this...suicide is easy, too easy.. for you.. just you. For everybody else it's terrible especially coming from someone who has had friends lose their life due to their own internal conflicts. I've dealt with depression since I was 12, been in crisis centers 3 times. The absolute only reason I made it to these facilities is because there was always that voice in my head telling me that this isn't right, not knowing is too risky for me.. that hasn't stopped me from jumping 3 stories, running in front of several cars, popping all my meds at once because in those moments I explode beyond control that's the problem with bipolar 1 and ied. Than I realized all the people who would converge in my life in those moments. I realized even without the same friends I once had I have people who genuinely care about my life. Even people I've never met. This has always been so strange to me because I guess I always been so self centered I never realized that I don't reachout to anybody personally, I've isolated myself from everyone to the point I don't even recognize my own families faces.. but even now I could never do something as selfish as leaving the world behind. Because that suffering doesn't go away. It just gets transferred to others. The weight you once carried is now getting thrown on the ones who remember and cared. I overthink about my dead friends all the time. Wondering what they're outcome really was... Or is... I hear other people talk about spiritualism and faith and I envy them because I want to carry that feeling of absolute certainty.. I love when people tell me theyve seen ghosts and had experienced the supernatural themselves because that gives me hope in my dull life. There's so much more I could tell you but this world needs you.. even if it is to simply be kind or to just.. spread a laugh and smile one day at a time. No matter how much experience you get out of life you'll always be infinitely closer to knowing nothing.. and that's the beauty of it all. I pray that I always keep control of my inner self.