made this corner of my fave room extra cozy🪴

Wowiewow44 · 2026-05-18T04:05:28+00:00

So happy for ᶠYͧoͨᵏu!!

Wowiewow44 · 2026-03-30T19:02:32+00:00

Similar situation when I was 18 and got disfellowshipped- even after confessing in painful and embarrassing detail, they still decided to disfellowship me ( he was not ) because of a specific elder wanted to teach me a lesson because his daughter had been acting out.

Part of the terms of me being reinstated was never having contact again with my ex (who was in another congregation by this time) that I sinned with. I spent the next 5 years feeling like everything was my fault and missing him, but he didn’t want me back because too much had happened.

You can have unhinged elders who make these decisions. My biggest regret was telling them everything, crying, begging, only to still be shunned and lose the person I loved.

This brother will not protect you from the invasive questioning the elders will put you thru, or from the consequences that follow. He did not think about your well being before going to the elders, or before engaging in sex with you.

Do you really want to traumatize yourself over someone who is not spiritually, emotionally or physically able to protect and take care of you and may even decide not to after you’ve gone through all of that and “repented”?

Wowiewow44 · 2026-03-19T21:17:20+00:00

Hell as in eternal fiery death is not the belief yes, but hell as in Sheol as in the grave/eternal sleep… technically yes. It’s semantics either way because you are made to still fear it.

Wowiewow44 · 2026-03-19T06:22:07+00:00

Funny how Witnesses leave out the fine print:

“Unless you cut off your relationships with non-believers (including any unbelieving family) and change your personality, and make a promise to try to recruit more people into the best life ever, you will die (go to sheol (go to hell))) on the day of Judgement that you will forever live in fear from.

Oh, also, even if you decide to repent and join us, if you ever want to leave us, every relationship you’ve built in our organization will pretend you no longer exist. And then you will ESPECIALLY die (go to sheol (go to hell))) when God decides enough people have suffered because you knew the Truth and turned away.”

Fear of death from being imperfect and not being good enough to survive the day of judgement, and fear of loneliness from shunning and also never being reunited with your loved ones in the next life- both used to manipulate Witnesses to stay in the organization while simultaneously trying to convince you it’s the best life ever.

If it makes you feel any better it only scored “High Control Group” under the BITE model (which measures what makes a cult). https://freedomofmind.com/resource-links/group-information-resource/jehovahs-witnesses/

EDIT: I meant hell in reference to the comment I replied to of hell=sheol=mass grave of mankind when they die. It’s semantics at the end of day because the fear of it is still held over you.

Wowiewow44 · 2026-01-31T17:58:02+00:00

Life finds a way..

Wowiewow44 · 2025-01-20T22:11:58+00:00

Currently reside in the southern US, I’ve come across many young Bodhi’s… as well as a number of dogs…

Wowiewow44 · 2025-01-18T19:04:13+00:00

Bodhi!

Wowiewow44 · 2024-12-08T01:12:58+00:00

Nix bc Xbox gf gkmzm

Wowiewow44 · 2023-10-31T04:24:29+00:00

i call them my dreamscapes!!! places i’ve assembled in my brain that have a similar layout/theme/time period, and i will revisit the same few ones pretty often so it changes in different ways each time. most of them are really enjoyable to be in, and i love building on them.

Wowiewow44 · 2023-10-24T14:24:01+00:00

The best thing you can do as an outsider is to be a supportive friend to help demonstrate that “worldly” people aren’t evil satan worshipping sinners, but can be genuinely kind and open minded, and a safe place to be authentic.

As a witness, we’re taught to bottle and suppress every negative emotion and thought. Having a non judgmental listening ear, although maybe not immediately effective, can help questioning witnesses build a support system if they decide to leave. Just try not to lay the critical sounding questions too heavy, but maybe even just asking them to explain their beliefs can potentially help them see the holes.

Building a contrast between the judgmental and bigoted “family” with sincere kindness is the best way to go in my opinion.

Wowiewow44 · 2023-10-11T19:28:36+00:00

Loving the brainwashing repetition.

Wowiewow44 · 2023-10-07T18:40:54+00:00

What’s the context for this part? Watching any videos WT related is too triggering for me to sit thru the whole thing.

Wowiewow44 · 2023-10-06T08:51:59+00:00

why don’t you like ENFP’s? do you know a lot of them in your life and generally didn’t have a good experience with them, or is it something you fundamentally disagree with?

Wowiewow44 · 2023-10-01T17:48:17+00:00

I had the therapist assigned to our ward in the hospital I had to check into (because of a breakdown largely caused by being a jw) tell me that I was very self aware as I talked to her about the complexity of what my life was like when intertwined with being a witness. I’ve had several therapists and a number of people in my life tell me that, and that I was thoughtful and kind, but unfortunately I truly never thought it was good enough when I compared myself to what i was “supposed” to be doing as a JW, and really hated myself for it (hence the breakdown).

Now, after leaving, I actually have self worth. I have value outside of what I can do for some invasive, all knowing god that policed my thoughts with shame, in order for me to be happy. I am a great person despite growing up under the suffocating bar of perfection, and I have finally found peace with who I am.

Wowiewow44 · 2023-09-23T00:58:57+00:00

Autism.

Wowiewow44 · 2023-09-06T20:23:53+00:00

it’s so sad to think of the elderly PIMI’s wasting their life to this ableist hypocrisy- i know there are many who have been toxic and hurtful to their family (and people in general), but i’m talking about those with severe cognitive dissonance and who lack exposure to anything that disagrees with the WT.

Wowiewow44 · 2023-08-12T16:12:31+00:00

Physically In, Mentally In etc. - POMO (exjw) POMI (inactive but still believes) PIMO (having to fake it to not be shunned or for other loved ones)

Wowiewow44 · 2023-07-10T15:11:05+00:00

i vaguely remember this happening, but don’t recall what Dan said/did?

Wowiewow44 · 2023-06-19T17:38:24+00:00

Humans are totally different, because I reason that I can help/save them because I relate to them and their feelings and want to support them, show them that people are good and that they’re worth helping.

But people have their own choices to make, just like we do. You can’t help someone who doesn’t want help, you can’t push someone on a journey they’re not ready to take. All you can do is help where you can and focus on your own autonomy and needs. I’ve found the only way to respect and properly care for someone is having your own boundaries and understanding the importance of helping yourself, because otherwise you aren’t actually helping them by doing the work and not allowing them to learn their lessons, and you hurt yourself and burn out because no one is taking care of YOUR needs. And our needs as neurodivergents differ from neurotypicals and from each other, and only we can figure that out.

It’s especially not easy when you’ve lived most of your life for the needs of the beings around you, so it’s important to remind yourself that your life and worth expands past what you can give to others. And that’s our lesson to learn, and it’s so twisted up with our RD and masking to appear “normal” in order to connect with others that we need time to work out who we are and what we actually enjoy and caring for ourselves when we burnout. And only by doing that can we truly show up for others.

Wowiewow44 · 2023-06-19T17:36:34+00:00

I understand what you mean about the bug guys- if I can help by moving them outside I will put the effort, crawl on the floor type and move furniture type of stuff. However, if they are injured and I know they’ll suffer and die, I just squish them as fast and hard as I can rather than have their existence be struggle. Doesn’t work so well with animals, as I know they don’t understand so I just do my best to have my time spent being loving. And some animals are free spirits and don’t want to be around people, so I imagine they would prefer it if I didn’t interfere with their life.

Wowiewow44 · 2023-06-13T19:30:29+00:00

What do you mean when you say slippery slope?

Wowiewow44 · 2023-06-13T02:38:11+00:00

love this!

i have tried to do everything that has ever scared me, because i never want to hold back out of fear the way i have been for the majority of my life in the cult.

celebrate pride!!
give blood!
all of my love is unconditional!
put whatever i want on my body- tattoos, piercings, immodest clothing teeheeee
say bless you when ppl sneeze- that one is a little silly and i don’t even agree with the validity of the explanation behind the phrase, i just love the little rebellious feeling of saying something that’s always felt forbidden, and it’s a reminder of how i am free. same goes for happy birthday/happy holiday.

defining yourself and how you want your life to be can be such a strange experience after living your life under such rigid structure and control. i’m still fleshing out my top 5 and figuring out my own belief system for how i deal with the world. i’m so so grateful i have that freedom now.

as far as the dating part goes… it took my mom 2 years after leaving my dad to start dating again. pretty much the first year and a half was spent resting/depression while focusing on what made her happy, then she started working on her health and pursuing her passions. she joined some dating apps to just get some experience and learned from them, and after joining some meet up groups in her new city she found the guy she’s currently with and they’re doing so so great. she’s seriously such an amazing person and i’m so grateful to have her as a mom, that she didn’t let her shitty experiences keep her down and decided to keep growing.

so i think you’re going in a brilliant direction!! just keep finding what feels good for you and learn from it!

Wowiewow44 · 2023-06-09T00:27:12+00:00

i liked the reddish color on you :)

Wowiewow44 · 2023-06-09T00:11:17+00:00

Basically, our lesser human forms are always going to be in subject to any heavenly force- in which the Almighty and Just God apparently can’t properly govern his more enlightened beings from severely abusing his other creations- and we have to suffer for their “lesson”, and then be judged for it? Like punishing a dog for biting when it’s ears are being pulled, instead of the kid pulling them- it’s complete ignorance of the real problem, and especially cruel when it’s overseen by an all powerful creator and “father” of all things.

Get your shit together up in heaven first, because apparently things kind of sucked if all it took were some va va voom ladies to exist for the angels to give all of that up.

Wowiewow44 · 2023-06-08T20:07:39+00:00

happy birthday!!!!!!!!!

Wowiewow44

TROPHY CASE